So my best friend was driving me home from watching a local wrestling show and we were talking about bodybuilding. I jokingly asked if he was going to watch Mr Olympia this year and he said that's gay and that he thinks I'm gay. I said nah, and he said I'm pretty sure you are.
I said I can't be gay, I'm three nil up, three women zero men slept with. (which is actually pretty pathetic for a 32 year old) He said but the last time you couldn't even get it up. I counter with the fact that I still did two times before. He maintained that it doesn't matter. What matters is who you're attracted to. Kept going on about how it's ok to be gay and there's nothing to be ashamed of. Seeing how he wouldn't drop it I ended up saying "Not quite".
That seemed to encourage him further. What does that mean? Not quite? I said it doesn't mean anything. It means I'm not gay. He said no, not quite means you're close. So are you bi?
I lied and said no. Then he asked if I was a crossdresser. He said I know you are. I was astonished and asked how he could possibly know that. He said cos he's not an idiot. So what is it? What are you hiding? He seemed to know there was more.
I looked ahead and quietly said "I'm trans". And he said I know you are. I've known that for years. He accused me of living a lie. I said that's too strong. He asked again if I'm living a lie and I said what is truth? He said now you're just trying to be clever. He said I knew there was another side to you you were hiding I was just waiting for you to say it. I asked why he didn't say anything earlier then, and he said because you'd probably run and hide for four more years.
He asked if I hated being a man, I avoided the question but he kept asking and I finally said yes. He asked if I wanted the surgery and I said yes. He said he finds it weird but that's just him, and thats only because he doesn't have what I do. I said you find it weird? I find it weird too. I don't know what to make of this most times. He asked why I don't transition and I brought up that there's alot of bigotry and he said there's alot of support too. He knows I hide in my room alot, but I left it saying that I'm not likely to change, but who knows. He told me to stop hiding things and that he's the best friend I'll ever have. I go home with my head bowed but I sent him a pic of me in feminine clothes and he said "bless ya".
Now that is a true friend. You are free to be yourself around him. Happy day!
I hope you realize how incredibly lucky you are. If i were you, i'd call him and tell him how much you really appreciate his friendship.
Laura
Some people are very sharp and we don't give them credit for it. If he's a decent friend then try to keep him on side.
Some common lines you'll probably hear when coming out to people:
Finally.
It's about time.
I've always known.
We often are just fooling ourselves that we are able to blend in and nobody notices that we are different.
If you think back in time, you might realize people knew that about you before you even realized it.
Yeah, I have gotten random comments all my life that hinted that my disguise wasn't as effective as I thought it was.
What a great friend to have!! I remember thinking the same thing when coming out to people, they would be honest and say they think its weird but still support my decision. I would tell them ya, I think its weird too! But I don't know what normal is?
You already have someone in your corner. That is a huge thing to have. Things will go much better than going it all alone like myself. I also took things very slow, I think this is a good way of doing things. It doesn't freak people out as much. I just gradually switched over to the other side. I finally had to become female fulltime, this was after being gendered female almost exclusively for at least 6 months.
Good luck, and appreciate the good friend you have!
Is it ok that kind of feel like Crying after reading this?
So nice! :3
It's ok, we've been best friends for 20 years. ^-^
I was expecting to go on hrt where eventually he'd notice a change, but I guess not. Hah.
wow what a nice friend and person. I'm so happy your friend was understanding AND you got to tell the truth. Bet it's quite the weight off your shoulders! Good luck!
Such a good story! I think I actually teared up...