Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Non-binary talk => Topic started by: j-unique on August 21, 2016, 09:44:02 AM

Title: Pronouns refused?
Post by: j-unique on August 21, 2016, 09:44:02 AM
Did near people (friends, parents/relatives etc.) ever refuse to using a certain pronoun (like "she") for you when you have explicitly asked? How did you react / what was your strategy to deal with that?

I know that it shouldn't matter what other people think, do, etc., and I know that I'll never pass as a woman, but it hurts nevertheless ...
Title: Re: Pronouns refused?
Post by: Elis on August 21, 2016, 10:08:39 AM
My dad screwed up a lot when I came out and I'm pretty sure he knew he was doing it. I ended up sending a text to him a few weeks later explaining how hurtful it was and he rarely does it now. I also told him and family it's understandable to get it wrong because they're used to using old pronouns but it's important to correct yourself.

Btw; you might want to check the before and after mtf thread. It's amazing the transformation that's possible even after decades of T poisoning.
Title: Re: Pronouns refused?
Post by: Tommy K on August 25, 2016, 10:39:23 PM
My father outright refuses to use "he". The rest of my family completely ignore it.
Title: Re: Pronouns refused?
Post by: Michelle_P on August 25, 2016, 11:03:19 PM
Oh, absolutely.  My spouse refuses to even recognize my transgender nature.  Total denial.

This makes like interesting, for highly conflicted values of interesting...
Title: Re: Pronouns refused?
Post by: j-unique on August 26, 2016, 09:00:29 AM
Ok, seems to be a common problem :(

At the moment, I don't want even to talk with my parents (and some "friends") because of that.

Some days ago, a friend told me "Life's too short to surround yourself with people who want to make you depressed" ... maybe she was right. ???
Title: Re: Pronouns refused?
Post by: Elis on August 26, 2016, 10:54:08 AM
Quote from: j-unique on August 26, 2016, 09:00:29 AM
Ok, seems to be a common problem :(

At the moment, I don't want even to talk with my parents (and some "friends") because of that.

Some days ago, a friend told me "Life's too short to surround yourself with people who want to make you depressed" ... maybe she was right. ???

Of course she was right; she's definitely one to hold on too. All of our negative thoughts come from our environment; it's up to yourself to nip those thoughts in the bud.