I think my wife is jealous. She has been very supportive of my transsistion, but seems to not want to say how nice my hair is or how thin I am, or how nice I look. Ok, maybe she's not super supportive. She struggles with her weight and her hair is thinning as she gets older. I think she has high T that's why we get along so well, cause she's the guy. Anyway, she said she is supportive but never uses the correct pronouns or calls me by my name, only my old name. I think it just comes down to I'm a better looking woman than her. Anybody else ran into this?
As I have always been single, I have never had that issue. I have a suggestion for you to consider. See if you can find things to complement your wife about and do so often. I suspect if she sees the good in herself and feels better about herself she will be more comfortable complementing you.
But I do complement her. The problem is I'm 5'8" 130 lbs size 6. And she's a size 13 5'4" 168lbs. My hair although I have reseeding peaks is very thick. I think she just thinks I look better than her but doesn't want to admit it.
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As you needed support, so does she. It is a big adjustment for a SO. Being female (my wife tells me over and over) means being self conscious. I have thought of this situation in my relationship. I make every effort to understand her feelings. I don't tackle that issue directly, but I make sure she feels comfortable that she can tell me anything, she can vent or discuss her insecurities.
Monica
Quote from: rachel.i. on September 03, 2016, 10:26:03 PM
But I do complement her. The problem is I'm 5'8" 130 lbs size 6. And she's a size 13 5'4" 168lbs. My hair although I have reseeding peaks is very thick. I think she just thinks I look better than her but doesn't want to admit it.
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Hi:)
I'm a SO as well, could I ask how long your partner has know about you for?
It can be really hard as a SO, although I'm quite confident in my looks:)
I agree lots of compliments as you're doing helps allot.
My special friend I think will look amazing with a full transition or somewhere in between. It took me a few months to accept how great they will look.... But being so much further down the track now with acceptance, I just wish for them to be happy whatever they look like anywhere on the spectrum. I would be proud of her:)
It takes time to move through these things and love/life isn't about who looks better, just the love and support along the way:) your partner will be needing lots of support as well. Possibly, if you haven't already you could take her on the journey of talking to her how important it is to you too look feminine, just an idea:)
I just thought I would reply from a SO point of view, hope that's ok.
Also well done on looking and feeling great:)
Marie
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Sometimes I do not understand her husband and <her> desires. Sometimes <she> makes me angry. I love <her> very much and try to support in all. Sometimes, I think <she> looks better than I do. <She> is more concerned about their appearance than I am. Maybe you should choose clothes together? ...
Moderator edits to clarify and correct gender.
Quote from: Sussy on September 07, 2016, 10:39:35 AM
Sometimes I do not understand her husband and <her> desires. Sometimes <she> makes me angry. I love <her> very much and try to support in all. Sometimes, I think <she> looks better than I do. <She> is more concerned about their appearance than I am. Maybe you should choose clothes together? ...
Moderator edits to clarify and correct gender.
sorry to interrupt the thread. I want to welcome Sussy to our site.
Thanks for joining in. I am not sure but I think you are the spouse of a transgender person? It's great to see you offering advice. There is also a section specifically for significant others and their families.
I hope you find what you are looking for here.
I also want to share some links with you. They are mostly welcome information and the rules that govern the site. If you have not had a chance to look through them, please take a moment:
Things that you should read
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With warmth,
Joanna