So I already have a gender neutral name (Alex) and wasn't planning on changing that as part of my transition. However, it seems that most people do, so i guess my question is whether there is anyone else here who did not change their name/isn't planning to? I understand the psychological reasons for choosing a new name, but as far as I'm concerned "Alex" has always been a man, and therefore I see no need to change it.
Plus, ya know, hassle... :-\
If you are comfortable with you old name, more power to you. My name clearly carried gender and that was the only reason I felt the need to alter it. It would save me a great deal of problems if I didn't need to change it as I could just submit the gender change paper work and court action wouldn't be required.
The only things I want to change is my middle name (currently Lucy - I propose changing it to Luke, as the name Lucy was given to me in honour of my Grandma, and I don't want to totally ignore that...it's not like anyone knows or uses my middle name anyway!) and the fact that I'm legally a 'Mrs'. When my ex and I got our civil partnership (this was before gay marriage was legalised in the UK, so any matrimonial name changes had to be done via Deed poll) we both changed our title from Miss to Mrs.
I have no intention if changing my name although I might alter the spelling. Spoken it is gender neutral. It is my name and I owned it a long time ago. I am the same person I have always been.
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I can't think of any other folks here, but I have heard of people with more neutral names just keeping them. I personally know an Alex, a Ryan, and a Riley that all kept their names. My old first and middle name were both extremely feminine and mildly old fashioned, so I had to get rid of them. I considered changing my last name as well, and would have if my family hadn't taken it well.
I say kudos to you if you don't feel you have to change it. I don't know if it costs money there or not, but here it can be quite expensive in some places.
Quote from: uk_older_ftm on September 22, 2016, 04:08:58 PM
So I already have a gender neutral name (Alex) and wasn't planning on changing that as part of my transition. However, it seems that most people do, so i guess my question is whether there is anyone else here who did not change their name/isn't planning to? I understand the psychological reasons for choosing a new name, but as far as I'm concerned "Alex" has always been a man, and therefore I see no need to change it.
Plus, ya know, hassle... :-\
I originally wanted to keep my birth name because mine can be turned into just Sam and it works out
my birth name is also gender neutral or can become gender Neutral. I wanted really badly to keep my name but the problem became i new everyone would associate it with my birth name and i couldn't get away from that.
So i started trying to change my name and so far it's alright but nothings completely clicked or stuck with me
maybe it's a matter of time or maybe i'll stay with my old name who knows whatever the case it'll work out :)
So yes i could possibly be one of them people who in the long run keeps my birth name you're not alone!
and never will be ^.^ it's fine to keep a name and if it is unisex then even more reason to keep it sometimes. For me i don't dislike my birth name i have no problem with my birth name i actually adore it
problem is as i said how people saw it but i'm starting to get over how others see things and its helping.
My birth name was Samantha its a wonderful name but i used sam even as a kid and may still.
Dude, youre hella lucky. When I was a kid I wished I had a gender neutral name like Alex or Taylor. You won the legal birth name jackpot.
I personally have no reason to change mine aside from being more male, so I just go by my nickname and change my full legal name.
Definitely not worth the hassle if you got it made!
I'm keeping my middle name. It signals a change to people because a lot of people at work had gotten used to using my first name, which I've always hated. My name is a family name so I like holding on to it.
If it was just Alex on your birth certificate and not Alexandra, then that's great. No need to change. When I was a kid Alexandra wasn't all that common a name in the UK really. In fact I heard people getting Alexandra wrong and calling girls Alexander mistakenly in school because they didn't know any better. These days though, if they hear/see the full name they recognize it as female. And some people insist on using the longer version until corrected or asking "so your name's Alexandra then?", if you give the short version and they read as a female. That could get very annoying for you if you have the longer version of the name and still have to use it in formal situations like applying for a job or a passport or whatever.
But if you were only ever called Alex legally, that's a bonus. I was. So it's not a problem for me. I might change my name anyway though. For one thing, people have constantly wondered if it was short for something like Alexia or Alexandra, and in quite a few jobs some of the staff took to calling me either of these things on their own. I had to keep crossing off the rest of it on my time cards until they finally "got it", and some people never managed to understand that I was never given any long version of the name. :-\
It's not a bad name though. Fairly androgynous which is an advantage during transition and later on easily accepted as a perfectly masculine name.
Quote from: T.K.G.W. on September 23, 2016, 10:12:57 AM
If it was just Alex on your birth certificate and not Alexandra, then that's great. No need to change. When I was a kid Alexandra wasn't all that common a name in the UK really. In fact I heard people getting Alexandra wrong and calling girls Alexander mistakenly in school because they didn't know any better. These days though, if they hear/see the full name they recognize it as female. And some people insist on using the longer version until corrected or asking "so your name's Alexandra then?", if you give the short version and they read as a female. That could get very annoying for you if you have the longer version of the name and still have to use it in formal situations like applying for a job or a passport or whatever.
But if you were only ever called Alex legally, that's a bonus. I was. So it's not a problem for me. I might change my name anyway though. For one thing, people have constantly wondered if it was short for something like Alexia or Alexandra, and in quite a few jobs some of the staff took to calling me either of these things on their own. I had to keep crossing off the rest of it on my time cards until they finally "got it", and some people never managed to understand that I was never given any long version of the name. :-\
It's not a bad name though. Fairly androgynous which is an advantage during transition and later on easily accepted as a perfectly masculine name.
It's Alexandra on my birth certificate, but when I did the deed poll I legally changed it to Alex at that point anyway. Another deed poll would just be to change my middle name and title. Funny looking back, I hadn't accepted my trans self when I changed it to Alex, but perhaps part of me had lol...
I did not change any part of my name. It works, though the ambiguity was a bit tricky in the early stages of transition. I did not believe that I was anybody else and it felt too strange to consider being called something different after 40 years of life.
My name is Heather and I don't plan on changing as of now. I'm not good at naming things anyways but I think the name Roman would be nice if I did change it.
I like my birth name though no matter how girly it is so a name change would be more of a convenience thing really
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Quote from: haeden on September 23, 2016, 05:54:37 PM
My name is Heather and I don't plan on changing as of now. I'm not good at naming things anyways but I think the name Roman would be nice if I did change it.
I like my birth name though no matter how girly it is so a name change would be more of a convenience thing really
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How about Heath?
Quote from: Dena on September 23, 2016, 06:05:48 PM
How about Heath?
I thought about Heath but I didn't feel a connection to it. I tried Hector too since it still started with an H (I was trying to stick with the letter H because I like that letter) and my snapchat name has it in there. I've also been called Hector before by friends because of my snapchat name so I thought that would fit me better and I just wasn't feeling a connection with it either. Roman is the only one I felt a connection to
I don't know though. I don't know if I have this connection with Heather because it's my name and it's all I've ever known (though I have been called Frank and Amber before. Even a Stephanie recently) or if it's because I'm afraid if I actually change to a more masculine name I'll get more dysphoria. Right now I don't really have dysphoria I just know I want top surgery but nothing else in my life bothers me so I don't want to trigger any dysphoria if that makes sense
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For the most part I like my nickname and think I'll probably keep it. It can sometimes be interrupted as a nickname for a different feminine name, but as a name alone I believe it is more of a male's name (usually in a different country, but still male according to google :P). I would definitely like to change my legal name though (for the sake of documents) as both my first and middle names are feminine.
I've also always liked Jamie though as it is a masculine name used a lot in my family, but don't like how it is being used more as a girl's name where I live (I live in the US by the way).
It'll be a good while before I can actually change my name though, so I still have a while to decide.
Quote from: haeden on September 23, 2016, 06:43:14 PM
...Roman is the only one I felt a connection to...
...or if it's because I'm afraid if I actually change to a more masculine name I'll get more dysphoria. Right now I don't really have dysphoria I just know I want top surgery but nothing else in my life bothers me so I don't want to trigger any dysphoria if that makes sense
By your profile pic, I think Roman would suit you if you went with that name. Go with your instinct on what is most comfortable for you though. :) And minus the fact that I get dysphoria from my birth name, I think I know what you mean when you say you "don't want to trigger any more dysphoria". I mean I am paranoid with "passing" as it is. If I have overly masculine name I think I might feel pressured to live up to it and "pass" even more. I think I might be able to decide things better name wise once I get top surgery and see where my comfort levels are.
Quote from: sigsi on September 23, 2016, 11:00:57 PM
For the most part I like my nickname and think I'll probably keep it. It can sometimes be interrupted as a nickname for a different feminine name, but as a name alone I believe it is more of a male's name (usually in a different country, but still male according to google :P). I would definitely like to change my legal name though (for the sake of documents) as both my first and middle names are feminine.
I've also always liked Jamie though as it is a masculine name used a lot in my family, but don't like how it is being used more as a girl's name where I live (I live in the US by the way).
It'll be a good while before I can actually change my name though, so I still have a while to decide.
By your profile pic, I think Roman would suit you if you went with that name. Go with your instinct on what is most comfortable for you though. :) And minus the fact that I get dysphoria from my birth name, I think I know what you mean when you say you "don't want to trigger any more dysphoria". I mean I am paranoid with "passing" as it is. If I have overly masculine name I think I might feel pressured to live up to it and "pass" even more. I think I might be able to decide things better name wise once I get top surgery and see where my comfort levels are.
Thanks! It feels the most natural!
I think Jamie is a very neutral name. I've known both males and females with that name but mostly males. I'm even reading a webtoon comic and the guys name is Jamie
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Quote from: haeden on September 23, 2016, 11:16:45 PM
Thanks! It feels the most natural!
I think Jamie is a very neutral name. I've known both males and females with that name but mostly males. I'm even reading a webtoon comic and the guys name is Jamie
Thanks for your viewpoint, that's awesome. :)
The only guys I've met named Jamie so far have been related to me somehow, but I've met a couple of girls named Jamie (or Jaime/other spellings) over the years so I was starting to think it might be changing. I read a few articles/charts a while back where it showed how popular the name Jamie was for males/females, and it looked to be neutral/feminine in the US and more masculine in the UK (which made me a bit over-analytical and paranoid).
I was aiming for a semi-masculine neutral name, so that works out great. Thanks again.
Quote from: sigsi on September 24, 2016, 02:31:59 AM
Thanks for your viewpoint, that's awesome. :)
The only guys I've met named Jamie so far have been related to me somehow, but I've met a couple of girls named Jamie (or Jaime/other spellings) over the years so I was starting to think it might be changing. I read a few articles/charts a while back where it showed how popular the name Jamie was for males/females, and it looked to be neutral/feminine in the US and more masculine in the UK (which made me a bit over-analytical and paranoid).
I was aiming for a semi-masculine neutral name, so that works out great. Thanks again.
Yeah to me it's a neutral/masculine name. Did you do that search for your birthday year or currently? It wouldn't matter if it's becoming more neutral / feminine because people that are around your age and older would be majority males with it so it wouldn't be odd if your name was Jamie. I mean people never question Jamie Foxx right?
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So my parents named me Christine. No one ever called me that. I've been Chris my whole life.
So when it came round to whether I'd change my name (legally / on documents), I came close to just leaving it alone.
I did end up changing it legally to Chris (not Christopher or any other variation), but yeah I almost didn't. I never show my ID to anyone (I guess when I was traveling a lot I showed my passport to airport folks) but otherwise my IDs are collecting dust lol
Quote from: sigsi on September 24, 2016, 02:31:59 AM
Thanks for your viewpoint, that's awesome. :)
The only guys I've met named Jamie so far have been related to me somehow, but I've met a couple of girls named Jamie (or Jaime/other spellings) over the years so I was starting to think it might be changing. I read a few articles/charts a while back where it showed how popular the name Jamie was for males/females, and it looked to be neutral/feminine in the US and more masculine in the UK (which made me a bit over-analytical and paranoid).
I was aiming for a semi-masculine neutral name, so that works out great. Thanks again.
Where I am, Jamie is definitely more of a girl's name... but it is definitely on the more neutral end of the spectrum? I have always liked Jamie and James.
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Quote from: haeden on September 24, 2016, 06:48:42 AM
Yeah to me it's a neutral/masculine name. Did you do that search for your birthday year or currently? It wouldn't matter if it's becoming more neutral / feminine because people that are around your age and older would be majority males with it so it wouldn't be odd if your name was Jamie. I mean people never question Jamie Foxx right?
Haha that's true about Jamie Foxx. And I searched for both. For my birth year (mid 1990's), it was more popular for a girls name. I think I somehow associated male with it because of my family, and will probably still use it as a middle name if I still stick with my birth name nickname :).
Quote from: arice on September 24, 2016, 10:30:53 AM
Where I am, Jamie is definitely more of a girl's name... but it is definitely on the more neutral end of the spectrum? I have always liked Jamie and James.
I was debating about James too as that name has been used a lot in my family as well. James kind of felt too masculine to me in a way though. I lean more on the agender spectrum so I think Jamie might work.
Thanks again to both of you for your replies :)
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And apologies to uk_older_ftm for lots of replies, not meaning to hijack your thread. Back to the main poster's question of anyone else not planning to change their birth name.
Oh gosh I didn't even know this wasn't your post. Sorry uk_older_ftm!
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Don't worry about it guys, it's cool :D
Quote from: xchrisx on September 24, 2016, 07:58:40 AM
So my parents named me Christine. No one ever called me that. I've been Chris my whole life.
So when it came round to whether I'd change my name (legally / on documents), I came close to just leaving it alone.
I did end up changing it legally to Chris (not Christopher or any other variation), but yeah I almost didn't. I never show my ID to anyone (I guess when I was traveling a lot I showed my passport to airport folks) but otherwise my IDs are collecting dust lol
Ha, thats funny, I go by Val...I considered keeping it as Val when I changed it but Im deciding to elongate it to Valentine, Val isnt nearly common enough to be taken on its own so I figure when people ask my name it'll be that. Unlike Chris which works on its own
If I had a neutral name, I'd probably not change it. But I have two fairly feminine names, one of them is pretty rare and uncommon but is feminine. So I'll change them as soon as I can. Bad thing I actually liked my name, I like unusual names buut I get dysphoric when I'm called by it. Like, always. xD And I'll kind of miss that people had to ask me like three times my name when I met them, it usually made them remember me.
But anyway. If I was named Alex, or Dennis, or something like that, I wouldn't change it. If I was named something like Samantha, Jacqueline or some name that can be shortened to a neutral version (like Sam and Jack for the ones I said) I'd probably just change them to the shortened way.
I saw some info the other day about most popular names for FTM and Alex being one of them (on of the top 5 or something). Not sure how I feel about it myself. I like my name better when it was rarer. The more people that have it, especially if it has become a common name for FTM, the more inclined I feel to change it...
Quote from: T.K.G.W. on October 01, 2016, 01:51:49 PM
I saw some info the other day about most popular names for FTM and Alex being one of them (on of the top 5 or something). Not sure how I feel about it myself. I like my name better when it was rarer. The more people that have it, especially if it has become a common name for FTM, the more inclined I feel to change it...
Early 90s babies were named it. There were several in my grade level so I don't think most people would assume trans like they would with names like skye or aiden. Even then they would have to know a thing or two to even guess those.
Quote from: CodexUmbrae on October 01, 2016, 10:31:05 AM
But anyway. If I was named Alex, or Dennis, or something like that, I wouldn't change it. If I was named something like Samantha, Jacqueline or some name that can be shortened to a neutral version (like Sam and Jack for the ones I said) I'd probably just change them to the shortened way.
As someone with a neutral name when you shorten it, you still have to go through legal stuff to change your full name regardless, although its nice to not have to go through the trouble to change too much, because people will not have such a hard time adjusting to your new name since you always go by your shortened name.
My legal name is Natalie Rose. Obviously, that has to change. I spent forever thinking of names, but none of them really landed with me. So I just decided I'd go from Nat to Matt. It just feels natural with me, and while my given name would make me feel horrible and dysphoric every time I heard it, "Matt" just feels natural. It's not my favorite name or anything, but it's the change I needed (also, I work with a Natalie, so this made things so much easier).
You're lucky to have been born with a gender-neutral name. My whole life, every time I would hear my name or someone would ask my name, I would have a mini panic attack on the inside over it (even when I thought I would be ok living my life as a girl). And going by my middle name wouldn't have been able to help me at all, so I've just been stuck with this curse all my life. As far as the name Alex, I have a roommate with that name. So I always associate it much more as a man's name than a woman's, but I like it for either.
I was planning on legally changing my name soon, but I just had my driver's license renewed, and they changed the license laws in my state. So I won't have a new ID until I'm about 40 (if I weren't changing my name, they would make me use my 21 year old picture until then). So now I'm just gonna wait until I look male enough that my ID will work for me for the next 8+ years. I already hate having to buy alcohol with this ID. Even my bank always comments on how it looks nothing like me already. I guess that gives me time to learn how to write my new name in cursive before I actually get to sign it on things.
Quote from: WolfNightV4X1 on October 02, 2016, 09:02:26 AM
As someone with a neutral name when you shorten it, you still have to go through legal stuff to change your full name regardless, although its nice to not have to go through the trouble to change too much, because people will not have such a hard time adjusting to your new name since you always go by your shortened name.
I know, I was just trying to say that I wouldn't change it for another name, yet I'd clearly shorten it legally. Would hate to take out my id that has Jacqueline or something like that written in it. xD