Poll
Question:
where has most of your support come from
Option 1: family
votes: 3
Option 2: friends
votes: 2
Option 3: doctors
votes: 0
Option 4: therapists
votes: 5
Option 5: significant others
votes: 3
Option 6: other
votes: 0
Option 7: yourself
votes: 11
Option 8: more than one of above
votes: 16
my support comes from my therapist of 3 years. She has been with me from day one. I have a sister ans a niece , but the only contact I have is through Facebook and to be honest it's pretty minor almost to the point of being superficial .
My support definitely comes from my therapist, and a bit from folks in the support group. This board and everyone here is a strong runner-up. I get more support by far from my electrolyst on our weekly sessions than from my family and their "Don't ask, don't tell, and never ever show HER around here" policy.
Electrolysis tomorrow morning! My last chance this week to present in line with my identity, then it's male drag for family events all weekend. :P
Therapists, wife and children - My wife would have had a harder time coming to the support without the help of therapists, but she has been of course daily help ( and not costing $120/hr always is a good thing too ;D) Kids were pretty much on board from the time i disclosed my plans.
In one sense I don't consider cost with my therapist because its through Medicare and I don't pay anything so for me she is an important friend.
Therapist, partner :-*, books (like the Transgender Guidebook), Internet ;D
I must confess Susan's has helped me through this process .
My GP has been absolutely amazing, she's the most fantastic, helpful, supportive, understanding woman on earth. She's more like a sister than my doctor.
My yoga teacher has also been absolutely fantastic. She persuaded me to transition and has been a great support through some really difficult times. She's like the aunt I never had.
My voice therapist, counsellor, electrologist and the friends who I've told so far have also been a great help, as has Susan's Place.
Parents have been much less than helpful, trying at every opportunity to make my transition as difficult as possible. I rarely speak with them now.
My local gender identity clinic has been of slightly more use than a chocolate fireguard. The woman who saw me on intake was fine but apart from that, they're not interested.
Jx
Myself most everyone in my life was disproving of it. But i don't care about there feelings on it. Considering to them i am just an embarrassment. I had some support from friends. But it was mostly i gave up one day on trying to please or impress people. Conformity is so depressing.
So after several idiot therapist. I finally found a doctor. Got hormones and family currently avoids me.
My therapist, my spouse, my support group, and last but definitely not least, the good people here on Susan's Place.
Myself...
All of the above really. My SO has been my biggest cheer leader and shoulder. Therapist and support group (IRL) has played a significant role. My doctors have been very supportive and helpful where they can. Friends that are sticking by my side, birth and adopted family...in the end, it is the internal perseverance and will to live is where the bulk of the support it.
Overall, the Myself option is the most practical, but I recognize that without the others...it will all be for naught.
Myself.
Mom also helped me big time, <3 mom.
I'm usually pretty intuitive when it comes to human behavior, but I was dead wrong about who was going to back me on this. The supposed love of my life washed her hands of me immediately, but my father and stepmother have been 100% supportive from day one--life is very strange.
Elora
Therapist, PCP, group, trainer, brother (deceased) and sister, work and fiends have helped me significantly. My boss was a hindrance.
My wife and daughter want no parts and were a hindrance (being nice).
Majority of support for my transition has been from within myself. When you can't see yourself being anything but the woman you are, that's all you really can do. I don't have the option to be anything else, being a girl is all I know. I transitioned when I was 15 and have always been girly. The other support I have is my family. I'm the youngest of 5 , one older brother and the rest of us are girls. My eldest sister has been my rock and she's always been the one to get everyone in check on my name and pronouns and I never really had to come out as trans because my sister beat me to it lol. I didn't have to have a deep talk with anyone. Also my dad was the first person to label me as trans and he was the first one to embrace it even when I didn't even know what trans was. My daddy died last week and it's been taking a toll on me because he was my biggest supporter and I also have srs with Chettawut in November and it's going to be really hard without my dad
sorry about your dad
I guess myself. The "friend" I did tell doesn't see me as a dude and doesn't respect me as one.
My mom actually has said she is happy as long as I am happy but we don't talk about feelings and sentimental stuff so we never talk about my transition past the point of planning for surgery.
So I would say I am my support system because I only really talk about me being trans to myself and I hardly do that lol
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I have had amazing support. I get a lot from my local trans support group, San Antonio Gender Association. My best support though is from my AA group. They have been amazing. I came out in AA and they haven't blinked. The cis girls have welcomed me and invite me out to girls nights. They give me makeup and tips. I haven't really started transitioning yet so this is huge from them. They guys too don't question me about it and just accept it. I will go to meetings with clear coated shiny nails, eye makeup and lip gloss. No one says a thing. It has let me become comfortable with myself as well as practice with not killing my nails or smearing my makeup. I guess it is a small reward for suffering through 40 years of alcoholism and being closeted. My wife, waiting on paperwork to be ex, on the other had treats me pretty bad. She says it is a choice, I ruined her life, I'm going to hell, she doesn't "believe in it", etc. I am hoping to be able to be out of our house by Jan. My life away from the house keeps me sane though. Good topic.
Support is a slippery slope....are others cheerleading us into our transition? That's not good. Speshully not if you're a people pleaser, and many of us are. Ultimately, I think if you're being objective, the only one that should motivate you towards any transition, should be yourself. In the final analysis, only you get to live in the skin you're in. You gotta :police: your own brain or you may end up prodded into the biggest mistake of your existence.
Two prime sources got me through the worse of times in the early days, my support group, especially a couple of angels there, and of all people my wife, the one person in the world that knows me best. Sometimes even better then myself.
Today, there are no angels. Perhaps because I am better able to handle me then I was and learned the lessons I needed to from them. To help fill the void is my therapist for the things I cannot burden my wife with. (9 times out of 10 not GD related, just life BS)
All of the above and more. I also have received tremendous support from my employer and coworkers. So I would be unable to quantify the term "majority" because no one source has a majority.
I was my own support group. There was some acceptance among friends and family then, but no support. I was 'it', literally and figuratively. Now it's the same old story all over again. I am still fighting the uphill battle. So, obviously, it's me.
I selected significant other, but should have checked the bubble that says more than one, as I have a couple of close friends who are great about transition too!
For me it would be pretty much all of the above... There was really no one in my life who was not supportive ....
Before I knew that I would have any support whatsoever, my decision was made and it really would not have made any difference in me moving forward whether I had support or not... I was going to claim my life and not let anything stand in my way...But ... Having the people in my life behind me was icing on the cake and certainly made things easier
Onward we go!!!
Ashley :)
Hi Aria94
Sorry about your Dad
Liz
My therapist, wife and family and friends that know have all been amazingly supportive. And it seems like I add more every day.
My best friend, she has been wonderful to me.. She took me in when my family disowned me.. She encouraged me to face my female side and explore.. She gave me the courage to start therapy and also supported me when I started HRT. She taught me how to be a woman, she gave my fashion tips, taught me how apply makeup and even taught me how walk in heels.
When my mother reached out a few years later after my father passed away, she encouraged me to mend fences.. I am so glad she did as now, my mother and I are super close. She loves having a daughter.. and my new step father has no idea, his step daughter was born a boy.
She was also there waiting for me, when I came out of SRS. As a welcome to womanhood event, she painted my nails pink (hands and feet) and gave me a its a girl card.
Friends have by far been the biggest support for me. One friend in particular made it very clear that I should see a therapist before I started transition. She new I needed to do something about my gender and she very adamant about my seeing a therapist. So glad she was behind me. Hugs
Mariah