Ok so obviously I'm thinking ahead and the choices are pretty straight forward but my thoughts are both personal and based on assumptions. At the moment I am pretty set on cosmetic but owe it to myself to properly weigh all options so would appreciate some additional thoughts.
First of all what I think I know (any/all of it could be wrong)
Cosmetic
Theoretical possibility of better aesthetics as more time can be spent on looks and there would be no function to compromise
Sensate clitoris is still possible to give a button to that part of my brain (I don't use that part but options open at minimal effort)
Penetrative vaginal sex not possible
Future surgeries possible via grafts to convert to full but not recommended
No maintenance required
Less invasive surgery
Less risk
Shorter recovery time
Full (sorry don't know a better term)
Depth and capabilities are variable and can be trained to a degree
Structurally you can also clench inside similar-ish to cis
Inexperienced sexual partners would be unlikely to notice any real difference if stealth
Varying degrees of self lubrication
Daily dilation necessary to preserve function
I'm pretty much sold on cosmetic for multiple reasons
1. I'm 38 and not getting any younger
2. Haven't indulged in any personal sexual gratification for about a year (still enjoy pleasing partner though)
3. Doubt very much I'll be settling down with a guy (still possible and mind is open but doubt it)
4. I'm a low maintenance kinda gal and cosmetic is pretty much do it then forget it ever happened
5. Dilation I think would make me feel less real instead of more every time
Surgical risks can be managed and recovery time not a real issue long term.
Boils down to dilation really the amount of work to properly dilate and look after a functional vagina on the off chance I ever decide to have sex with a guy. Seems like a lot of actual work not to mention the psych trauma of having a daily reminder as to why I have to do it. Taking a couple of tablets a day forever with my vitamins etc is no big deal but pretty sure I'd struggle with dilation.
That said I know very little about dilation beyond maintenance guidelines.
I guess I'm looking for someone to make a pitch for full.
For those that lubricate is it controllable? (unlikely but had to ask I've had enough of my body doing things on its own to last a lifetime)
For those with experience of girl/girl relationships would the lack of penetration be seen as a significant loss by self or partner?
Bit of a car crash of a post but it's the best I can get my thoughts into any cohesive fashion.
Open to any and all thoughts particularly if based on experience.
38 is not too late to start. I had my "full" GCS at 38 and so far enjoying the benefit of it (even only with myself).
I don't see dilation session as "trauma" per say, it is more a "me" time to explore myself. Considering some cis women will also need some play time to truly understand what turns them on or off. Some cis that I talked to even mentioned that they don't feel anything the first time they experienced it.
by doing the "cosmetic" way, if the right guy comes along, you might have to resort to the back door option. I am personally not too comfortable with that option that's why I rather have the "full" option.
Lubrication and being orgasmic is crapshot pretty much, if you lucky you'll have both, some will have just one, some will have none. It is not something that can be guaranteed 100%, but with the advance of medical technique the number is inching closer and closer to 100%
It is a personal choice.
For me, I want a male partner. I will need a graph and I am 54. Dilation will be a pain but the schedule will get reduced with time.
I agree on the age element but if I were half my age the chances of me pursuing sex would likely have been significantly higher ;)
I have to admit from your own post and a page I was just reading (http://ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conway/TS/SRS.html) I am still definitely open to further thought.
I still have issues with who/what I was before so I fear that dilation would be a reminder of that but to flip it around as you said to "me time" that could be an approach I can work with.
Likewise not a fan of plan B for penetration so if sex is on the menu it has to be full from the outset.
Sex and masturbation are kinda on my block list just now as obviously any activity in my genital region freaks me out but naturally after surgery I most likely would be inclined to enjoy my body in any ways available. So if I went cosmetic it would be too late which is why I need to work it out before.
If you don't mind me asking.
How much of an impact on your life does dilation and vaginal maintenance make?
Thinking of the time cost of looking after yourself after "full" V's pleasure from it since would you consider it a fair trade?
Never too old to go after what you want but for me at 38 some days I feel like it should be 308.
Sexuality I'm still working on but my mind is growing up into the "curious" phase. What if's are fun and of course remind me to keep my options open. That and as I understand it a fully functional vagina can be enjoyed solo and in same sex relationships.
I am starting to sway towards full but am still concerned about dilation. The psych bit I think I can work with the "me time" angle leaving just the practicalities which is a very significant step forwards.
I'm not very disciplined which is why I'm sitting here in my PJ's at 00:51 knowing I'm up at 07:00 which is a lot funnier once you know my plan for tonight was to be in bed by 18:30 for an early night as a treat to myself.
With the importance of dilation I fear the consequences of failure given I'm the girl who was having 2nd thoughts about getting braces because I didn't want to wear a retainer while I slept. Having to set aside a private 30-40 mins several times a day for months following surgery seems impossible pushing me back to cosmetic.
Definitely food for thought but it's way past time to go sleep so I'm going to stop here go do my face etc and crawl off to bed.
Thank you both for your posts.
I'm in a same-sex relationship, older than you, but still opted for a functional vagina. I considered the 'cosmetic' option but passed. Reasons?
1) I wanted to feel complete as a woman
2) I wanted to be anatomically correct as a female to medical professionals
3) I wanted to leave open the possibility of someday having coital sex with a man
4) The extra cost was minimal, while doing it later, expensive
5) I was not worried about complications or a longer recovery period
6) The prospect of having to dilate regularly didn't trouble me
Now nearly a year post-op, I can say that I love having a functional vagina. I healed quickly without complications. I feel more confident as a female in most situations. I enjoy my daily dilation time which has been reduced to once every other day now, and is not at all painful. It's an excuse to be alone, relax, and read a good book before turning out the light. Vaginal penetration with a dildo is sometimes a nice complement to clitoral masturbation.
Sexual orientation has been known to shift post-op, sometimes years later.
Thank you Clara your post really does help me a lot and the balance is shifting further on points 1-3 alone particularly 2. As with the "me time" being "complete" does help to change my perception from ghost of the past to validation.
Being as close as I can to who I was always meant to be is important to me but with aesthetics being a much higher priority than function historically. As with the development of my breasts being not fussed at first (I was too concerned with saving my mind early on) I couldn't imagine not having them now. A functional vagina I think could follow the same path.
Dilation could simply be as much my fear of the unknown but your own portrayal of your dilation time actually seems quite pleasant. I will be doing more research into dilation later but so far it is sounding a lot less scary for both the process and long term time commitments.
Quote from: Clara Kay on October 11, 2016, 09:21:22 PM
I'm in a same-sex relationship, older than you, but still opted for a functional vagina. I considered the 'cosmetic' option but passed. Reasons?
1) I wanted to feel complete as a woman
2) I wanted to be anatomically correct as a female to medical professionals
3) I wanted to leave open the possibility of someday having coital sex with a man
4) The extra cost was minimal, while doing it later, expensive
5) I was not worried about complications or a longer recovery period
6) The prospect of having to dilate regularly didn't trouble me
Now nearly a year post-op, I can say that I love having a functional vagina. I healed quickly without complications. I feel more confident as a female in most situations. I enjoy my daily dilation time which has been reduced to once every other day now, and is not at all painful. It's an excuse to be alone, relax, and read a good book before turning out the light. Vaginal penetration with a dildo is sometimes a nice complement to clitoral masturbation.
Hi Clara Kay
I have to say I agree with your sentiments, I am 52 and I would like full surgery, for some of the reason you list above. I have no intention of straying out of my marriage to "try the equipment out" but I am also not doing it for those reasons. I have limited funds and am not sure what I am actually going to be able to afford but this is a very high priority for me amongst the things I want to do surgery wise.
Liz
Quote from: Jerrica on October 11, 2016, 06:25:53 PM
If you don't mind me asking.
How much of an impact on your life does dilation and vaginal maintenance make?
Thinking of the time cost of looking after yourself after "full" V's pleasure from it since would you consider it a fair trade?
Of course I don't mind :) the first few months (I think it depends on your surgeon's schedule) does takes a lot of time and dedication, even more during the first 1~2 months. Pretty much you will have a hard time going out, but I take it one day at a time and keep at it.
Looking back at it, I consider it more than a just fair trade (it was ahhh.. mahzhing). It is even better than before, with the only downside is when you have to go to pee somewhere disgusting (but I guess that also goes with the "cosmetic" option)
Thank you again jfong it is good to hear of your experiences directly particularly your honesty over the dedication required Vs reward.
I consider time to be a bit like pain and money if the reward is high enough I'll pay it gladly and not look back. The "cost" of dilation is starting to seem a fairer trade and more acceptable to me.
For hygiene how do you take care of inside? Obviously external genitalia is easy for cleaning in the shower and naturally I always want to look and smell my best.
In a related topic (possibly for Clara Kay if ok with it) there is no easy way to ask but can you enjoy receiving oral sex and from your partners perspective do you feel, smell or taste particularly different from GG. It's a deeply personal question and I'm sure bodies will vary considerably but any information is more than I have.
Likewise from a males viewpoint would be good to know as anything is possible.
Full is becoming a more solid possibility but I still have more to learn. Most importantly are there any negatives apart from dilation (which is no longer seeming that bad).
Are there any situations you worry that your vagina could cause concern for you. Does it ever cause discomfort, itch or sweat if hot or exercising etc. Does it ever hurt?
Ultimately apart from ongoing dilation I can just live my life?
With regards to sex would I be enough to satisfy my partner or would I be second rate Vs GG?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9-XMl3fg4M
Princess Joules describes her dilation process and "tools" Pretty informative as are most of her videos's.
Quote from: Jerrica on October 12, 2016, 10:53:39 AM
Thank you again jfong it is good to hear of your experiences directly particularly your honesty over the dedication required Vs reward.
I consider time to be a bit like pain and money if the reward is high enough I'll pay it gladly and not look back. The "cost" of dilation is starting to seem a fairer trade and more acceptable to me.
For hygiene how do you take care of inside? Obviously external genitalia is easy for cleaning in the shower and naturally I always want to look and smell my best.
Some say that it is self cleaning, but I do find sometimes the odour lingers (but I think it is more from the pee than the vag). Nothing that can't be fixed with a regular bath. If you need to, you can also douche with saline water (suggested by my surgeon) and nothing else.
Quote from: DawnOday on October 12, 2016, 11:42:44 AM
Princess Joules describes her dilation process and "tools" Pretty informative as are most of her videos's.
Just take it with a grain of salt. Everyone is different, and also she had complications the first few days of her surgery. I think now she's ditching the orange ones and just use the green one.
ps. I know her personally so that's where I derive my comment from.
I had the same question a little while back and posted a tread concerning surgery with vaginal canal or not. A similar discussion ensued. I am waiting for my date. I am 63 and will be going the vaginal canal route. In the end, I came to the same conclusion as Clara, with my list being almost the same. I have no interest in males. I have always wanted to feel like the woman I always knew I am!This includes having a vagina! That is me talking so please don't take it that one has to have such GRS to feel female. Each of us will and should make our own decision. Doing the research not will help you when you are ready to get GRS. I am sure that there are many others who are thinking of this decision. All the Best!
Hugs,
Kelly
Thanks DawnODay been a while since I watched that one and is a good introduction to dilation scheduling and of course discussing the dilators themselves.
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I love your openness jfong and very much appreciate your help.
Your comment about odour is exactly the kind of information most wouldn't even think about but is important to me. Doesn't make or break my decision but little things count and shows how much thought is put into your replies. I know I keep saying it but thank you :)
Pendulum of thought swinging back the other way of cosmetic = job done. As I understand it you can still masturbate effectively (should I choose to someday) with cosmetic so it really boils down to doing "full" for another person.
Think I'll have to give some heavy thought to penetrative sex to decide it. Still loads of time but think convenience may win out in the end for me.
Quote from: Jerrica on October 12, 2016, 10:53:39 AM
In a related topic (possibly for Clara Kay if ok with it) there is no easy way to ask but can you enjoy receiving oral sex and from your partners perspective do you feel, smell or taste particularly different from GG. It's a deeply personal question and I'm sure bodies will vary considerably but any information is more than I have.
Interesting question.
In a study of the differences in microbial flora populations within the vaginas of natal vs trans women, it was found that the pH of trans women's vaginas is higher (more alkaline) than that of a natal woman. The higher acidity of a natal woman's vagina means that it will not support the growth of various pathogenic species which cause infection, strong odor, etc. It seems that the higher acidity is due to the presence of the lactobacillus bacteria which for some reason cannot survive in the neo-vaginas of trans women.
So, what does this mean for me personally? Well, first, I don't douche. Dr. Chettawut told me it's not necessary unless I experience strong odor from my vagina. I don't. The odor is actually pleasant when I'm a bit aroused, but it's not the same as my partner's. Still, oral sex is certainly a possibility depending on your partner's attitude about it.
Dilating on a regular basis (at 1 year post-op I dilate every other day) using a water soluble lubricant (KY or equivalent) seems to clean my vagina pretty well by itself. I do wash my outer genitals when I shower. I have not experienced any problems with discolored discharge or strong odors since my first month post-op.
BTW, my outer genital area (clitoris, clitoral hood, vestibule and labia minora) is always moist (self-lubricating) from the urethral mucous tissue placed in that area during GRS.
Thank you Kelly I'm sure it's a question we all have to answer in the end and it's great to have others willing to share their experiences.
No denying the vaginal canal route is popular and with many good reasons.
It would be good to know if anyone has actually chosen cosmetic here and their thoughts after.
For myself simply being able to see all of me in a mirror without flinching or sighing is the dream and to wear whatever I want without worrying about exposure. Cosmetic would give me that without feeling any less a woman.
The optional extra (in a way) is to be able to have sex which is of variable value to us all.
Brilliant post Clara Kay thank you very much for replying and the level of detail given especially your personal intimate experiences.
The information about the self lubricating aspect is very interesting.
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Quote from: Jerrica on October 12, 2016, 02:31:09 PM
I love your openness jfong and very much appreciate your help.
Your comment about odour is exactly the kind of information most wouldn't even think about but is important to me. Doesn't make or break my decision but little things count and shows how much thought is put into your replies. I know I keep saying it but thank you :)
Pendulum of thought swinging back the other way of cosmetic = job done. As I understand it you can still masturbate effectively (should I choose to someday) with cosmetic so it really boils down to doing "full" for another person.
Think I'll have to give some heavy thought to penetrative sex to decide it. Still loads of time but think convenience may win out in the end for me.
You are most welcome :)
Btw, I found out since that like cis women I have 2 ways of being stimulated, internally and externally. Sure the internal one takes a while longer than the external one to learn, but when they both combined.. "WOW" is all I can say .. lol. That is also why I said that the full one is definitely worth it in my book in my earlier replies.
According to what I read, cis women also don't usually enjoy sex until their mid 30s (this might be outdated info) but you can imagine they also need to learn how to enjoy what turns them on, and that's why "me" time is important. Some will prefer internal stimulation, whereas some just like the external ones just like some of my cis girl friends.
In the end it is up to you to learn the +ve and -ve and decide what's best for you.
The possibilities are definitely there and "WOW" could make for a very good reason.
I still have issues to sort out in my mind about masturbation but higher chance of that than intimacy with another person so options open I guess.
Your help has been invaluable taking a cosmetic pretty much decided to a much closer call which is actually kinda fun to have a real choice to make.
I'm definitely in a much better place to give both options a fairer consideration thanks to you all.
The choice is obviously yours. As I have said in other threads on a similar topic; The advantage of full SRS is that you have the chance to know what having the surgery feels like and how you feel post op about maintaining your new parts. If don't want to carry on with dilation you just stop and your body will take care of making sure it heals over.
I'm 18 months post op and still haven't done anything sexual but I did test out how it all works a couple of times :angel: For me dilation is my time to just give myself some pampering. Not everyone agrees with me about dilating and most just do the minimum they can which is fine, Depending upon who your surgeon is after 6 months you can basically do it when you feel like although I still follow Chetts dilation routine because unless I'm busy I feel I owe it to myself to look after the bit I spent so many years craving.
Feminine hygiene is something we all need to deal with and it would be easier without an inside part but you'd still have to clean down there properly. I suspect jfong is right that much of the odour is related to urination which you'll still do. I get an odour but while I'm cleaning up from dilation I have a feminine wash solution I clean the area outside with and also apply bio oil for scar reduction.
I hope you manage to decide and are eventually happy with whatever you choose
Hugs
Sorcha ;D
As I got towards the end of transition, I discovered my sexuality changing. Well, it's kind of funny to say -- I was heteroflexible before, and heteroflexible afterwards (with varying periods of just being queer). The point is, I started becoming strongly attracted to men in a way I hadn't been before. And this after feeling non-sexual during transition itself (because "down there" was a source of dysphoria and had to be repressed).
So having the "full deal" was crucial to pursuing that interest.
It's an interest that developed in my 30s, and now as I approach my 50s it hasn't changed. If anything, it's grown stronger. I've had many sexual experiences this year, with men and women, many quite experienced, and with all I never disclosed my narrative, and as such it was utterly crucial to having had full SRS and secondary labiaplasty to make that happen. A while back, I was in a long term relationship for over six years, again with no issues. In other words, I am pretty certain that having a "normal" vagina (with an interior) is crucial to passing in bed, which in turn will affect how you pass in such relationships overall.
So, a little about my experience. I went to Toby, fit and trim, and got a very good result. Fully orgasmic, both vaginally and clitorally. I'm at about 7 inches of depth, and working to develop more. My pussy smells like pussy. I do need lube, but this is common for women of a certain age, and of course it's not exactly uncommon even among younger women. One of my younger partners back in the day, a ciswoman in her twenties, always needed lube.
Daily dilation isn't necessary to maintain function, not after the first 3 or 4 months post-op. Regular sex can take care of that further down the road. In my case, I had a fallow period after breaking up with Mr Six Years, and went about three years without dilating at all. It took about a month of regular work to regain my depth and stretchability. And personally speaking, I haven't found dilating to be unpleasant at all. In maintenance mode, it takes about five minutes a week, though I usually take longer because I find it much more pleasurable to incorporate this with masturbation. Hell, I don't even need stents anymore. I use dildos and vibes, like any other woman.
Finally, don't think that regular dilation post-op is anything "fake." Consider cis-women who suffer from vaginismus -- hyper-contraction of the vaginal muscles upon any kind of penetration. There is a cure for this condition, and it's basically dilation. And lube. And Kegel exercises. Exactly what we do as we recuperate from surgery.
Mostly, though, there's a very powerful sort of gendering that occurs during sex, especially when you pass and haven't disclosed your narrative. I learned more the first time I had intercourse this way than I did in years of therapy and transition, or gobs of books and eloquent writings, what have you. It's... I struggle to find the right words for it. Being seen in this way, so close, so intimate, it got... it got deep into my soul. I'm really sorry I don't have the right words for it. Okay, maybe it's like this -- you know what it's like to be dysphoric? To even have a twinge of it? Now, imagine all that gone in a puff of smoke, all the way down to your bones, even into your memories. I saw myself in someone else's eyes, in a way I hadn't ever seen myself before, and there was a truth there that I simply had to accept. And so there was a "letting go" and at the same time a reception, an acceptance, all at the same time.
It never hurt (he had plenty of lube), but I was sore in the morning. Oh, that soreness in the morning! Being able to actually feel my emptiness. It's strange, but I felt so much closer to womankind that morning. (It's no less profound with another woman. Having our fingers and hands and mouths and strap-ons inside each other. Mirroring each other.)
It's something I'll never forget.
I'm not saying if you go this route, you'll have the same experience. Everyone is different. But if you go down the other path, you'll likely be foreclosing this possibility for the rest of your life.
Any type of elective surgery is a very personal thing and each individual must not be influenced by other people. This is something that you must do by your own choice. I will make a few comments of my own or add to from other posters similar experiences, as I feel other people's experiences may help someone to visualise their own life in later years.
I had full srs approaching ten years in a few months. I had always wanted this done and still feel it is the best outcome for me (still super happy and never no regrets).
Your major comments often relate back to dilation. Yes at first it is scary and uncomfortable, but after things settle and you start adjusting to the new lady bits it is not an issue at all. I followed the schedule very strictly for the first 12 months, after this period you are very comfortable and learn to know what you need down there. Over the years I have tapered off with dilation and now dilate once a week, just by inserting 32mm dilator, with lube. I feel I could completely stop dilation, but for my own piece of mind I keep this up. In saying this I have a male partner and we are sexually active at least 3-4 times per week, approaching 7 years soon.
All girls are faced with feminine hygiene issues, which means vaginas do need a little bit of care. I donot douche, or should I say I did very early post op under initial hygiene, but only a few times and have not done that for years. I do not have what I call odour, there is a smell if a stick a finger and smell, but not a bad odour and as others have said it is possible some natural and some urine. I am constanly moist down there, but not wet, I feel it is just nice. On a day to day basis there is not much discharge if any. I have a habbit (don't know why) but when I pee I usually take a peek of the cotton crotch lining of my panties, and it does vary from day to day but it ranges from slight to nil. My boyfriend does often go down there to give me pleasant oral and apart from me finding it nice, he often goes back, so I don't see an odour problem. I do always wipe dry after peeing and give good pat dry with towel after showering, but I have never had infections or such as some girls mention (either girls like us or cis). I hate using dirty rest rooms, but that is a problem for anyone regardless of theis surgery status.
I am very sensative and can achieve climax without problems. I did have problems early post op, but that was years ago and now everything is great. I feel that climax from penetration is my ultimate and we have achived together at the same time on many ocasions and it is great. We do use lube, but that is personal choice and we have done it, just from own natural source, but we like it wet.
I have not seen a cosmetic only result or what life is like with a cosmetic vagina. This type of surgery never entered my mind. I had my surgery at the age of 26 (now 35) and at the time I was not in a relationship and it was a few years after surgery before this relationship started. I would not let your age factor your decision, just continue with the thoughts if you need a vaginal canal or not. You will still look perfect standing in front of the mirror, public changerooms, beauty parlour or massage etc.
This is possibly no help but it just reflections of what surgery has done for me, but all comments may help
xx
Thank you all for your posts every bit of experience helps and your posts provide exactly the kind of real life details that raw medical information lacks.
It really does seem to come down to dilation as if asked cosmetic or full with no difference in aftercare it would be a no-brainer for full. Can be hard to think of a year as a small period of time when you've not really been alive that long but that said this year has really flown in.
Alone time sounds good then again it does sound as good and almost impossible to all mum's I guess. With dilation as high as 4 times a day for 30 minutes a session I honestly don't know how I'd mange to fit that into my life with work alone blocking 9-5.
Options are always good and I have grown up a lot since I got back and not finished yet so more changes are on the cards especially after surgery when my genital mind block is removed. Sex remains a possibility which is only provided through one option.
Ok so we know with cosmetic you can at least in theory undergo further surgery to get a functional vagina if you change your mind.
If starting from full however and deciding nope you're 100% sure now you're never ever going to use it. Can it be closed? Is it safe or painful to stop dilation on a never again basis?
With a way out so to speak it would allow going for full but with the option to almost change your mind if it came to it.
If that is possible with no adverse consequences such as pain or discomfort forever then Full would be the way to go but I always need to have a Plan B as a safety net even if it isn't used. Naturally I'll need to look into the medical side and discuss with a surgeon eventually but as always any information already know to any of you would be greatly appreciated. (I'll do some googling later for more info too of course but more credibility is always given to posters here)
Quote from: Jerrica on October 13, 2016, 02:35:02 AMWith dilation as high as 4 times a day for 30 minutes a session I honestly don't know how I'd mange to fit that into my life with work alone blocking 9-5.
Well, you'll want to take a good two to three weeks off work for SRS, or any major surgery for that matter. The first week will be in the hospital or aftercare facility, depending on where you go. The next week (hopefully two) at home.
Once you're back in the work flow, it doesn't have to be so frequent, or for as long. By the time I started my third week, I only needed to dilate twice a day for about 15 minutes to maintain my width and depth. You could dilate in the morning, before work, and when you get home from work, and at bedtime if you need to do more. That's really going to be sufficient, and catch up on the weekends if necessary. Even then, it's only for another month or two. Depends on how fast you heal, which in turn depends on your overall health. I was very fit when I had SRS, so I didn't have to be so aggressive. (I ended up being more aggressive anyways, just because I got to the point of really enjoying doing it in the first place. Any pain I experienced was a dull thuddy achey pain that quickly went away.)
QuoteOk so we know with cosmetic you can at least in theory undergo further surgery to get a functional vagina if you change your mind.
Theory is different from practice. Where is that skin graft going to come from? Will it take? (For there are issues of blood supply and innervation.) Can you afford to take more time off from work? What about the repercussions of a relationship going south because you didn't take care of it the first time around?
There are fewer surgeons who will do this, and they'll probably be more expensive.
QuoteIf starting from full however and deciding nope you're 100% sure now you're never ever going to use it. Can it be closed? Is it safe or painful to stop dilation on a never again basis?
With a way out so to speak it would allow going for full but with the option to almost change your mind if it came to it.
If you change your mind after full SRS, you just stop. It doesn't hurt, and it won't affect your functionality (the urethra isn't in the vaginal canal). No surgery required. Much easier if you're inclined to change your mind.
And, if you change your mind
again, it's possible you'll only need to dilate to regain your functionality.
Thank you Sophia. Generally I heal pretty fast and would say I'm relatively fit and healthy so should have a reasonable recovery time. Time will tell.
Completely agree with the issues regarding further surgery from Cosmetic and it certainly wouldn't be a desirable choice.
Time off work will be ok and if 3 times will suffice while working that is definitely doable.
With the last piece of the puzzle coming from you with regards to the ability to stop dilation (if need be) I am now secure enough to decide on full.
Thank you all for your help and looks like Full is the right way to for me to go a choice I couldn't have weighed properly without you all.
I'm back to necro my post with my final decision........ cosmetic!!!
What makes this decision more final than the last one???
I've emailed my request to Chet and I won't be changing it ;D
Ever since I made the previous decision for full I've been rebelling against it in my mind and coming back to pick at it going round & round in the classic Brain Vs Feelings way.
In short full surgery would be to the benefit of someone else who would not be me or my wife.
Whilst there are no guarantees my marriage will last I feel it will and I'm going to go with it.
I would like to thank everyone who got involved while I was working my way through this but slice'n'dice then I'm done.
I'm planning a very busy life and seriously not organised enough to do anything beyond my tablets.
Dilation and even sex are just not for me if the worst happens I'll be looking for someone who wants me for me not just for what they can do to me.