So here is my introduction. I thought I have been away for 9 years, but in searching for traces of me being here before I see that I was part of the wiki staff in 2006 so that would be that my fateful night was December 31st 2005 when I stop going through the guns looking for the perfect one and found this web site.
Yes my life has changed in ways that I could never imagine that night. There has been some struggles. There has been some losses. It has been well over 9 years since I have had a thought of ending my life. The internal struggle is gone and I am at peace with myself.
July of 2007 I had SRS in Thailand. I am happy that I have done that. I got divorced and then Married again. Is it my third or the first marriage of Amber. I have a 29 year old son that up until a few weeks ago supported me in this journey. I have started a family again and have a 6 and 4 year old that call me mom. That is such a joy in my life. I have parent in laws that respect and appreciate me. My Parents have gone into witness protection so to speak and then come back into life.
I have started a business and I have found myself in places at times I never would of imagined. I have traveled to Utah and even spoke in public. I have found new friends and my life has been busy and productive.
A chance to reinvent myself. A metamorphic change that in a large part I have had some control over. At times I still struggle with misgendering by people. At times I find myself hyper vigilant in being aware of my surroundings. But for the most part I am respected in my small community. There maybe challenges ahead as I start taking my kids to school but I know that I have a huge support network.
So here I find myself searching the web for answers again. My son whom was supportive has told me that I must hide a part of me to be in new grand daughters life. I am to be stripped of all titles. I am not his father. I am not her grandmother. I am just family. We are at odds right now as I have told him that there is no choice for me. I can not hide who I am or who I was. The one thing I have learned over the years is that I must be true to myself. To be put in a closet again would be damaging to my mental well being. It will be interesting to see how this unfolds
Amber
Welcome back to Susan's Place. The final decision will and should be yours but this brings some interesting thoughts to my mind. What happens when the granddaughter starts asking what happened to grandpa? What relationship is this mystery woman who spoils me rotten? Most important does your son wish to raise a child that will not be accepting of differences in people. Your son really need to answer these questions as these are the questions he will be dealing with in the future and it would be best if he doesn't live a lie.
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Hi ravenwolffe :icon_wave:
Welcome back to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here again, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Hi Amber and welcome back! Congratulations on transitioning. You really have progressed quite nicely. I pray that your son does come around and let you see your grandchild. Thank you for such a positive and encouraging story.
:)