Recently during a wonderful night out with my 2 best friends, I told them that I was transgender. To my surprise my friends welcomed it with open arms. Which is great! However, my fiance of 2 years has still only partially accepted my coming out. I came out to her about a year ago and its still an issue...
I'm pretty much at the at the end of my rope here... What do I do?
I can't tell you what to do. But there is an elephant in the room...
If your fiancee is not accepting, is this a relationship that you want to committ to "until death do you part"? I think you should resolve this issue before proceeding with permanent plans.
Different people need different amounts of time to process this kind of information. Is a year enough? Only you can decide that. If you have given her "enough" time (whatever that is) and the answer is not, "Yes, I accept you are you are" then you have to assume that the answer is, "No, I don't accept you."
Can you honestly stay in a relationship with someone who doesn't believe you are who you say you are? Or who can't abide?
Keep in mind, marrying someone is WAY different than just being friends: you're talking about deciding to spend the rest of her life with you, as a different gender than when you met. Yes, this was a MUCH better time to tell her than most people I hear about, but I'm going to say something unpopular here: I don't blame spouses for being upset when their partner comes out. Agreeing to a serious long-term commitment like marriage with someone, then suddenly finding out they're a different gender can be a real upsetting thing. Not saying that the complete rejections are acceptable either, but you can't ask a significant other to keep the same feelings when you're a different gender...
Well, last night we talked things over. She has agreed to stay friends, which is nice. She said she is happy for me and is excited to teach me about makeup, so there is that. ;D
All in all, I think it's a good thing, I can finally open up to myself and live life the way I want to and finally be who I am supposed to be!
Quote from: PrincessCrystal on October 26, 2016, 12:45:16 AMI'm going to say something unpopular here: I don't blame spouses for being upset when their partner comes out. Agreeing to a serious long-term commitment like marriage with someone, then suddenly finding out they're a different gender can be a real upsetting thing. Not saying that the complete rejections are acceptable either, but you can't ask a significant other to keep the same feelings when you're a different gender...
I completely agree, and I say that as someone who made this exact mistake.