Ok, so this topic might be a little indecent. I will try to keep it as pg-13-R rate as possible. So I know I'm a woman, and I like the thought of someday riding on a "penis" but I don't know if I really want to be with a man. I've never really liked the male figure. I female body has always been more attractive to me.
Does that make me a lesbian then?
The labels are all so new to me.
Thanks ladies 💋❤️💋
Alora
PS - to the moderators sorry if this is considered inappropriate.
Well, of you identify as female and are interested in female partners...that spells out 'lesbian'. If you like both, then 'bi' js accurate. I identify 'pansexual', meaning it is not about being attracted to male or female, but to the person irrespective of gender.
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Sometimes it will become clearer as time and situation progressed. I thought I was a closeted lesbian before with the same thought as you. But as I move further along in my transition it becomes clear that my interest was more of a longing for something that I didn't have before. My orientation has changed..straight now.
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It's been said, but give it time..it may change. In my case questioning and transitioning really only solidified my understanding that I'm super gay (or lesbian rather) (:
I've only ever really been drawn to women. There was a period where I questioned the exact same thing though. Maybe try not to put a label on it and just do you.
Are you looking for resources regarding terms / labels?
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Quote from: Jill E on November 19, 2016, 09:08:57 PM
Are you looking for resources regarding terms / labels?
I would love some resources. I went to a Trans101 forum at my college on Friday and I learned a lot. But my head was spinning and I don't know how much I truest obsorbed.
Thank you everyone. I will give it time and try not to put my new self in a box just yet. But I can relate to what you said. Maybe I am a "super lesbian" too.
Loves 💋❤️💋
Hi Alora and welcome to the forum!...
My advice would be not to worry to much about a label to attach to yourself...if you are moving forward with transition you will find it a journey of discovery about how you relate to others.... I came from a lifetime of attraction to and relationships with women ....I never had a desire to be in a gay relationship with a man during my previous life but had always wanted to be with a man as a woman.... As I moved into transition, I explored that further and recently married the greatest guy in the world!!!! ... My attraction to women... Or what I interpreted as attraction, just kind of melted
Here is some reading for you that I recommend highly!
http://www.avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm
Onward we go!!!
Ashley :)
I'm kinda in the same boat, although I am attracted to both male and female. On some level, I'm pansexual, but I would say bisexual because I like manly men and girly girls. Regardless, I do feel that I more or less fall in love with the person and not their sex or gender. I wouldn't mind being with anybody as long as we are mutually attracted to each other and are truly interested in each other. I get more turned on by intellect, so intelligence plus good looks equals a deadly combo for me. I wouldn't know what to do with myself. Did I digress? I digressed, didn't I? Sorry about that.
As to how you described yourself, I, too, am attracted more toward females than males, but I could see myself being swayed in the male direction given the right mixture of characteristics. I certainly think what you described is bi-curious because you entertain the thought of being with a man, but merely for the act of sex. It's a tough call, but only time will tell.
Quote from: SiobhánF on November 19, 2016, 10:18:04 PM
As to how you described yourself, I, too, am attracted more toward females than males, but I could see myself being swayed in the male direction given the right mixture of characteristics. I certainly think what you described is bi-curious because you entertain the thought of being with a man, but merely for the act of sex. It's a tough call, but only time will tell.
Thanks ladies both for the welcome and sharing with me. Siobhán you know I think your right. Given the right combination of both physical and mental strengths I could entertain being with a man. And yea, bi-curious may be the best way to think about things right now.
Thanks again ladies 💋❤️💋
Quote from: tgirlamc on November 19, 2016, 10:15:09 PM
Here is some reading for you that I recommend highly!
http://www.avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm
Wow. As I read through the whole thing, I found many of the things I've experienced throughout my life and really made me feel like I'm truly not alone. Thank you, Ashley!
(btw, sorry in advance for derailing the conversation. I just wanted to make a note about the linked text.)
I think men are beautiful , but I also think that of women
For about all my life I have been sexually attracted to women. In bed with same, the only way I could orgasm was to get into my fantasy of being the female. My wife knew all this took good advantage of it ;)
I try not to worry about labels.
Quote from: Alora on November 19, 2016, 08:01:48 PM
Ok, so this topic might be a little indecent. I will try to keep it as pg-13-R rate as possible. So I know I'm a woman, and I like the thought of someday riding on a "penis" but I don't know if I really want to be with a man. I've never really liked the male figure. I female body has always been more attractive to me.
Does that make me a lesbian then?
The labels are all so new to me.
Thanks ladies 💋❤️💋
Alora
PS - to the moderators sorry if this is considered inappropriate.
I noticed that when I was on medroxyprogesterone, that men started to look really amazing. But now they seem to be a bit less so because I've since stopped. I need to get back on Progesterone because this isn't quite natural. Anywho, the brain of nearly all animals is designed to find the female form more appealing so that's not really a surprise. But I am in a similar boat. I think of myself as questioning, and once I start becoming a more sexual person deeper into my transition, I think I'll most likely end up identifying as bisexual.
You might discover that the kind of sex you want can change during and after transition. Or not.
Be open-minded about it.
Quote from: SiobhánF on November 20, 2016, 05:29:40 PM
Wow. As I read through the whole thing, I found many of the things I've experienced throughout my life and really made me feel like I'm truly not alone. Thank you, Ashley!
(btw, sorry in advance for derailing the conversation. I just wanted to make a note about the linked text.)
Glad you enjoyed it Siobhan! i too was amazed at how much of my life was reflected... I am definitely a group 3 girl :)
Onward we go!!!!
Ashley :)
Quote from: tgirlamc on November 21, 2016, 12:25:05 PM
Glad you enjoyed it Siobhan! i too was amazed at how much of my life was reflected... I am definitely a group 3 girl :)
Onward we go!!!!
Ashley :)
Me, too. It's the reason most everybody that I know didn't see it coming when I came out. Thanks again! :)
Quote from: tgirlamc on November 21, 2016, 12:25:05 PM
Glad you enjoyed it Siobhan! i too was amazed at how much of my life was reflected... I am definitely a group 3 girl :)
Onward we go!!!!
Ashley :)
I want to reread it, but I definitely think I'm a group 3 girl too. But I digress.
Loves 💋❤️💋
I feel the same way. I identify more as a lesbian too, due to attraction. Although I might try it with a guy anyway cause I want to know what it feels like.
Right now, I am in a phase or stage where I don't care anymore. I am close to 40, and I don't see myself in a relationship with anyone. I had a few stints with a couple of males, fun nights after my SRS. But the intimacy alone doesn't cut it for me. But I also can't be in a relationship. It's difficult. But it also takes the pressure off, like, I don't have to... a peaceful way of living, but it can be lonely.
I don't know, maybe it will change. I believe in a certain destiny. And that the people you meet are there for a reason. It might not make sense and void of reason, but I experienced so much, that it is true for me even if I cannot explain it. I certainly will not put everything down on random chance anymore.
Quote from: 2cherry on November 22, 2016, 01:42:21 PM
I believe in a certain destiny. And that the people you meet are there for a reason. It might not make sense and void of reason, but I experienced so much, that it is true for me even if I cannot explain it. I certainly will not put everything down on random chance anymore.
I believe as well... There is much to our relationships to others and the world around us beyond that which we see with our eyes!!!... I have seen too much in my life that is far beyond random chance...
Onward we go...
Ashley :)
I love to read Dr. Vitale's essays. Here's another that's relevant:
http://www.avitale.com/relationships.htm
Wow I'd swear most of that growing up was recorded from my life. I never realized how common or how predicatable the behavior associated with being a "group 3" is. Reading that paper put me in an all out tears down my cheeks moment, not normally something I do.
Her developmental review is something that I urge everyone I come out to to read. It truly is the most eloquent and accurate description of growing up dysphoric that I've seen. Not to mention that she even provides discussion and citations for the medical/hormonal side of it, which is something that helps people understand that "Yes, this is a real thing."
Reading that essay helped me accept who I am and realize that I'm not alone and needed help. She's touched a lot of lives by simply sharing that piece with world. I'll always be grateful to her for the work she's done.