Hey everyone,
My name's Michelle, I'm 23 and have been on HRT for about 10 months now.
I was unsure about srs before hormones but now that I'm on it I just feel so confident that this is something I want to do.
I don't hate my genitals. I just feel like on hormones my sexual response has changed to the point where having a penis just feels like a limitation in that area.
For anyone whose gotten it I want to know, what was it that gave you the courage to set up that appointment. I'm so scared about side effects and recovery and also in terms of finding a partner, I'm worried that men are only into transwomen pre-op and if i'm post-op and they know I'm trans then no one will want to be with me.
I know that sounds awful but it's something on my mind (considering that honestly the primary reason for my getting it is because I want to be able to enjoy my sexuality)
Any thoughts/advice would be great.
also hope everyone is surviving trump!
<3
Quote from: moon on November 24, 2016, 05:19:00 AM
I'm worried that men are only into transwomen pre-op and if i'm post-op and they know I'm trans then no one will want to be with me.
Do you really want to be with someone like that?
for one thing I don't think a guy who wants a transgender specifically would be looking for someone who had the operation. I could be wrong , but once you have the operation you function totally as a woman. I just don't feel that's what a specifically orientated transgender seeker is necessarily looking for. I much prefer someone who wanted me for me. I would think most guys are looking for a companion and not specifically orientated towards the penis. If I'm making any sense.
I just HAD to do it. I followed my heart and never regretted it. I did it for ME, first. To feel comfortable and right in my body so that everything made sense. I didn't care about side-effects, I was ready for anything but I also knew that, in general, the surgery is quite safe nowadays. I had confidence in my surgeon, was surrounded by friends and family who supported me.
IT FELT RIGHT. :)
Hi Michelle,
Our genitals are a huge source of how we construct gender. You're a woman, so it makes sense that you'd want a vagina. Of course!
So it was very easy for me to set up that appointment. As for recovery, I made sure I was physically fit going into surgery, and that helped a great deal.
As for finding a partner post-op, why would anyone think you're anything but a woman? You're a woman, and you're under no obligation to disabuse anyone of that fact.
I can't speak from experience, but I wanted to comment on your concern about relationships post-op. It's been the experience of (multiple) trans women friends that heterosexual cis men are more attracted *after* surgery. The most common given reason was that they personally didn't think they could sexually function with someone who had a penis instead of a vagina (regardless of gender identification; I do wish to stress that for the majority of these, they were respectful and presented it as an issue with their own sexual function and not because they disrespected or erased the fact that the trans women they were attracted to were still women).
So, while there's probably some individual out there who is flat opposite, I don't think it's something that would be common from what friends have said.
I have to echo the poster who asked, though, why you would even bother with someone who would make a big issue out of you being trans. That would be an instant "Nope" for me.
Also, *hugs and cookies offered*. <3