It's been in the works for several months with HR, my manager and others
but I finally did it. Patty, who I work closely with and has been there for me so much
that I started calling her "My rock" .. I so appreciate her help I'm doing a piece
of art work for her.
On my coming out day, I was scared to death. I arrived late, having a lot to get ready
but I thought I had a pretty nice outfit - white/grey and black sweater dress, black tights
and calf high black boots. I texted Patty and she came and got me in the parking lot and
we went in - my stomach doing some sort of roller-coaster amusement ride thing. Everyone
was very nice and I settled in to my cube and soon started feeling more comfortable.
Using the women's room was stressful and still is, but I'm getting better with.
Some of the guys are difficult, not wanting to talk to me or even look at me, but hopefully
this with improve overtime. It's been a hard and difficult struggle but I'm getting there.
All the best,
Kath
Kath,
Congratulations.
Question for you, roughly what percentage of the people in the area you sit knew beforehand?
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First of all, congratulations, that is awesome!! I'm sure that's got to be a major weight off your shoulders (of course maybe some new ones forming now). Hopefully over time things will settle out and they'll just accept you for who you are. I'm sure you'll have some challenges to deal with but it sounds like you've got a good support structure at work.
I'm kind of curious too, did you make a formal announcement to anyone (like a group email or anything) in advance or did you just show up one day in full female presentation?
Way to go Kath. I found that if the majority support you there can be a social pressure for the non supporters to be quiet. Be aware that not everyone who is quiet is hostile. I had a number not say much to me for a while. The reason, they were afraid of saying the wrong thing and hurting my feelings. Congrats!
Monica
Lisa and Monica thank you
It is a relief not to be sort of in between.. boy mode at work
and then girl mode everywhere else. Feels good and easier to
be just me everywhere. I do realize that for some (mostly guys)
it is hard to approach me and not sure about what to say. I feel
I need to force myself on them a little bit to break the ice.
Having so much support at work has really helped me coming out.
HR and management did have meetings with everyone the prior week
while I was taking days off and also in court getting my name
changed. They all had a long weekend to digest the news and get
used to the idea of me showing up as Katherine.
Hi Kath,
I found humor was awesome getting people to relax with the new me. Once people realize you will still joke with them it helps them loosen up.
Monica