Hello everybody!
My given name is Brent, but you can call me Renée (a name I've been throwing around in my head). I'm an 18-year-old college student finishing up my A.A. before planning to move on to a 4-year, and then who knows where to get my Masters, and maybe even a Ph.D. I intend to get a degree focusing in Music Theory/Composition. I play guitar in a folk-rock band and a metal band, and I enjoy volunteering at local museums and hanging out with my siblings, friends, and beautiful girlfriend. Now that I've introduced myself, on to the reason why I'm here.
For years I've battled depression and anxiety rooted in my unresolved identity and orientation problems (particularly in identity; not rooted in dysphoria, but rather, euphoria or desire to be different from what I physically am). I insisted to myself for years that I was inventing my own problems and it was all in my imagination. I was very afraid. I hid all aspects of my character and focused on my studies. That was until I finally accepted that I felt romantic attraction and started dating my girlfriend. Being with her has allowed me to grow as a person in unimaginable ways. Eventually, I started to realize, one by one, that my primary fears had some merit. A couple months ago, I came out to her as bisexual. About a week ago, in midst of self-realization, I told her what I still struggle to accept myself: that I am a girl, that I am trans. I just came out to my mother two days ago and things are going well.
My girlfriend has been encouraging to take baby steps in my moving forward. That's why I'm here. I have made myself an account and am posting my introduction in an effort to keep progressing and working towards normality in what was supposed to be normal, had my body not been incongruent with my mind. So...
Hello everybody!
(P.S.: Hopefully I posted this in the right place.)
Hi, Renée! Yes, you definitely posted in the right place. :)
Welcome to the site. You've taken some pretty darn big 'baby steps' already, going through a process of self-realization, and coming out to someone else. I think that the support you have gotten from your girlfriend is fantastic. I hope you can find the help you need in starting your journey with the folks on this site.
I hope you feel welcome here.
I also want to share some links with you. They are mostly welcome information and the rules that govern the site. If you have not had a chance to look through them, please take a moment to go through them.
Things that you should read
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- News posting & quoting guidelines (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,174951.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Once again, welcome to Susan's. Look around, ask questions and join in.
Thank you very much for the warm welcome! :D
I already feel pretty welcome here; I've been looking at posts on this forum on and off for a couple weeks and beyond that I was occasionally reading threads in the past years. Reading the posts here have helped me become more comfortable and, in between the moments of crisis, I finally feel excited for the road ahead of me, despite the trials and tribulations.
Hi and welcome Renee,
I invite you in to take a seat and get comfortable. Pull up a chair, put your feet on the foot stool. Let you hair down if you can. (Some like me can't as it just isn't there anymore) Relax and read the forums. Post your questions. If there is one thing this place has an abundance of it's people like you and I that are here to offer help in the way of advice, personal stories and just plan information. So jump right in and get to it.
Be welcome Renee,
Hugs,
Jeanette
Hi Renee,
There are wiser and more experienced voices here than me, but I will join the chorus of welcome begun above.
I think your girlfriend has given you good advice. Take your time. There is no need for a headlong rush. One carefully- considered step at a time. You are fortunate in that university communities often have a multitude of services that may be able to assist you in your journey. Use the resources available to you. Find a counselor (therapist) in whom you have confidence. This is an essential first step.
All the best to you.
Renee,
Professional therapy is very important. They can work through some of your feelings and offer some guidance. Typically they will not tell you what to do but together you explore possibilities.
Baby steps are key. You don't want to scare those around you and you don't want to scare yourself. (Trust me, I've done both!)
- Dee