Hi Girls! I'm relatively new to the community and I am, for what matters, pre-everything (for the purpose of full disclosure, I did auto-medicate with E for 2-3 weeks, a long time ago, but I don't think that counts as HRT). I'll be having my first appointment at a gender clinic in quite a few months but I am already starting with some potentially reversible changes (though I doubt I'll ever change my mind - I didn't for the last 40 years...), such as weight loss, epilation, taking very good care of my skin, promoting hair growth (minoxidil + finasteride - but I still have a considerable MPB, whence the head cover), learning to walk like a woman (including in heels), etc. Today I decided to fool around with my wife's make up (very basic stuff... some BB cream, lipstick, eye shadow...), put on plain tricot top and this was the result. Note: I still haven't started with beard removal (other than usual shaving) and I am willing to undergo FFS as needed.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1253.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fhh588%2Fvandistelsarah%2F20170214_141619-COLLAGE_zpsriamb0du.jpg&hash=24abe8699f118340253c8d5bb1338d57a0b228c7) (http://s1253.photobucket.com/user/vandistelsarah/media/20170214_141619-COLLAGE_zpsriamb0du.jpg.html)
Do you honestly think that I have any chance of passing, in some (very?) distant future? I may look ridiculous, but the truth is that I felt very cute while taking the pics... :icon_chick: But I am also very well aware that it's difficult to look objectively at oneself. So, thanks beforehand for your much appreciated opinion!
Hugs, Sarah
Honey,
First you have great potential! Just look at the Before and After thread.
Second: never use your partners clothes or make up unless they allow it. It is a car crash waiting to happen when they find out.
I can tell exactly where my lipstick, eyeshadow, moisturiser are from day to day. I think most women do.
It is also unhygienic.
Quote from: Cindy on February 15, 2017, 03:55:30 AM
Honey,
First you have great potential! Just look at the Before and After thread.
Second: never use your partners clothes or make up unless they allow it. It is a car crash waiting to happen when they find out.
I can tell exactly where my lipstick, eyeshadow, moisturiser are from day to day. I think most women do.
It is also unhygienic.
Thanks! That's encouraging! And you are right about the other stuff. The make up is my wife's but she never uses it (was still unopened since years - a gift that she never used) and she previously gave me her permission... As for lotions, creams, skin care products, they're all genuinely mine and only I use them. The clothes, also mine (far from a wardrobe, but a couple of nice items I gained the courage to buy some time ago). ;) Sorry that I didn't made that clear!
Hugs, Sarah
Great starting point with plenty of potential. I am always encouraged seeing how incredibly pretty and feminine other people have become, with 'worse' templates than both of us. Awesome to hear you are taking care of your skin; I too started doing that pretty early and it was such a boost! Far nicer no-makeup look, the face looks cleaner and softer and any makeup you apply will look just so much more even.
If you can build up the courage you should go to a specialist store and get some foundation that matches your skin tone. I only started working on my makeup very recently after joining this place.. But I find that having the right shade of foundation, and the right set of natural eye shadows and blush is very important for a good result!
Quote from: Floof on February 15, 2017, 04:31:50 AM
Great starting point with plenty of potential. I am always encouraged seeing how incredibly pretty and feminine other people have become, with 'worse' templates than both of us. Awesome to hear you are taking care of your skin; I too started doing that pretty early and it was such a boost! Far nicer no-makeup look, the face looks cleaner and softer and any makeup you apply will look just so much more even.
You, Miss, made my day! :icon_flower: That's so true, about the skin care! I couldn't believe it... After just a couple of weeks, I looked already a few years younger! I almost can't wait for the magic of HRT! May I ask for how long you were on E when you took your picture (avatar)? You do seem to have a smooth skin!
Quote from: Floof on February 15, 2017, 04:31:50 AM
If you can build up the courage you should go to a specialist store and get some foundation that matches your skin tone. I only started working on my makeup very recently after joining this place.. But I find that having the right shade of foundation, and the right set of natural eye shadows and blush is very important for a good result!
Yeah... The keyword here is "courage"! :-\ Perhaps if I go with my wife it wouldn't seem so odd... Eventually, I will have to do it because it's one of the few things you cannot just order online, without actually seeing (and possibly trying), right? At least, not the first time...
Hugs, Sarah
Quote from: Sarah.VanDistel on February 15, 2017, 04:56:23 AM
May I ask for how long you were on E when you took your picture (avatar)? You do seem to have a smooth skin!
That pic is 2015 actually, I only started any sort of HRT 3 months ago today! Of course I have the benefit of being young, but I still noticed a huge difference after starting to take proper care of my skin and being diligent in that routine every morning and every evening. I am noticing some improvement from the HRT too, which is great. Sooo excited to see myself a year from now.
Quote from: Sarah.VanDistel on February 15, 2017, 04:56:23 AM
Yeah... The keyword here is "courage"! :-\ Perhaps if I go with my wife it wouldn't seem so odd... Eventually, I will have to do it because it's one of the few things you cannot just order online, without actually seeing (and possibly trying), right? At least, not the first time...
Hugs, Sarah
Trust that for me too, going to that makeup store for the first time was just impossibly hard. Took days to build myself up to it, and when I went there I freaked out and passed it initially, walked into a random book store and just stood staring blankly at a shelf of cooking books trying to calm my nerves! I did manage to gather myself and go there in the end, and it was absolutely worth it. The lady I met was very kind and understanding of my situation, and gave me great help and advice. Even got some free stuff -a little bag to keep the things in, some mascara and lip balm-, which was a very nice gesture.
I think we are both in very accepting and open countries, so the biggest obstacle for us is our own -often unfounded- fears of how people will react. Sure there are awful experiences too.. But at least in Norway they are few and far between, compared to the times I am met with kindness and sympathy. Don't rush into it though, you have plenty of time before your appointment with the gender clinic to sort these things out!
Best of luck <3
I wasn't aware you were in Norway. We're almost neighbours! Yes, I know that if I go inside a cosmetics store, nobody will kick me out and they'll probably be nice, but still... The pounding heart... You know how it is. I smiled while reading your experience. :-) It was almost the same when I went to buy my first set of feminine underwear. The other women looked at me a little confused, but nobody called security. Lol But I am confident that I'll do it (cosmetics store, I mean), despite being a little shy... And it may not take so long. Do you know any good reference or site that teaches makeup?
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I honestly think those cheekbones will look absolutely stunning if you keep on with HRT!
Honestly I was the same in terms of not knowing and wondering if I will need FFS to achieve feminine facial features but it seems like I'm on quite the good end for face changes.
Personally I'd reccomend getting a peach colour correct stick like CoverFX to mask your beard then use a foundation - then go wild! As long as you're applying good bases and moisturising you can honestly go crazy with makeup - I personally don't use much but I've already had my good share of weekends where I'm essentially going on a personal face painting journey. HAVE FUN!!!!!!!
I hope your gender clinic sessions are great and informative... I reckon it'll be just fine ^-^
Quote from: nicolejr on February 15, 2017, 07:01:25 AM
I honestly think those cheekbones will look absolutely stunning if you keep on with HRT!
Honestly I was the same in terms of not knowing and wondering if I will need FFS to achieve feminine facial features but it seems like I'm on quite the good end for face changes.
Personally I'd reccomend getting a peach colour correct stick like CoverFX to mask your beard then use a foundation - then go wild! As long as you're applying good bases and moisturising you can honestly go crazy with makeup - I personally don't use much but I've already had my good share of weekends where I'm essentially going on a personal face painting journey. HAVE FUN!!!!!!!
I hope your gender clinic sessions are great and informative... I reckon it'll be just fine ^-^
Thanks Nicole! [emoji4] So happy to read such nice comments! So encouraged, also! Thank you for your makeup tips - I'll consider them for sure. As long as I don't get rid of the beard, I'll have to cover it really well... But your post made my future look a little brighter and I'm really thankful for that!
Hugs, Sarah
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Quote from: Sarah.VanDistel on February 15, 2017, 06:15:20 AM
Do you know any good reference or site that teaches makeup?
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Can't be of much help there I'm afraid! I usually just go on youtube and search for a makeup guide on whatever I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get the hang of eyeliner and eye shadow at the moment, but I'm just so terrible at it.. Hard to get it to look nice!
I'm sure some of the other ladies will be able to provide you with some helpful links, vids and advice :)
Sarah, you have great potential. With a bit of an eyebrow trim, you could be my best friend's sister in photo #3.
Quote from: KathyLauren on February 15, 2017, 02:35:39 PM
Sarah, you have great potential. With a bit of an eyebrow trim, you could be my best friend's sister in photo #3.
Thanks Kathy! Sooo happy today! Really floating in tje clouds! [emoji39] My next step will definitely be visiting a cosmetics shop and begin experimenting!
Hugs, Sarah
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I agree, very good potential. Still a ways to go, but that's true for just about everyone starting out.
I think you'll benefit greatly from FFS.
Start electrolysis now, because it takes a lot of time and if you get to the point where you're chomping at the bit to go full time, you don't want to have to deal with facial hair. If you're still concerned about reversibility, begin with your neck -- if you do decide to step back from this all, you won't regret having that area all nicely taken care of.
Plus, how you feel about actually having electrolysis will be a good measure for your own personal understanding -- not so much whether you can tolerate it, I'm not talking about that. Rather, if you feel good about changing your body to appear more feminine, if you like the sense of female gendering it confers, that will surely point you in the direction you'll want to go.
Quote from: Sophia Sage on February 15, 2017, 03:25:23 PM
I agree, very good potential. Still a ways to go, but that's true for just about everyone starting out.
I think you'll benefit greatly from FFS.
Start electrolysis now, because it takes a lot of time and if you get to the point where you're chomping at the bit to go full time, you don't want to have to deal with facial hair. If you're still concerned about reversibility, begin with your neck -- if you do decide to step back from this all, you won't regret having that area all nicely taken care of.
Plus, how you feel about actually having electrolysis will be a good measure for your own personal understanding -- not so much whether you can tolerate it, I'm not talking about that. Rather, if you feel good about changing your body to appear more feminine, if you like the sense of female gendering it confers, that will surely point you in the direction you'll want to go.
Thank you Sophia! I feel very encouraged! [emoji4]
I do see some aspects that I would like to change on my bony structure, especially the frontal bossing and I think I need some kind of temple augmentation, perhaps some chin contouring and lip lift. I want very much to be passable but I certainly don't want it "overdone". I'm blessed with a small and barely visible Adam's apple. 😊 Anyways, concerning FFS I don't want to rush things because HRT will possibly (probably?) modify my face a bit...
As for electrolysis, my beard is indeed one of the most disturbing sources of dysphoria. I try to shave every day and although I know I must definitely get rid of it, I didn't yet because I'm still stealth in public (namely at work) and I suppose people would start to question... I'd prefer to come out after I've had at least a few therapy sessions at the gender clinic and preferably after I've began with HRT. On the other hand, many MtF say that electrolysis may be much less painful if done before starting HRT, so I've not yet decided. What I have decided is to start IPL on my beard (coincidentally, yesterday was my first session) - in a worst case scenario it won't be effective and there is always a chance that it will (perhaps substantially) reduce the amount of beard to be subsequently removed through electrolysis.
You know, a few weeks ago, I would say that the "reversibility" feature was important, but some important events took place in the meantime and this isn't relevant anymore - I decided that reversibility is no longer an option for me. I want it done and it will be done, but I want it smoothly done... In want to stay "zen" along the process... I'll do whatever I can to make it a natural metamorphosis.
Again, thank you so much for you comments and advice. I feel that you and the rest of this community were my salvation! [emoji6]
Warm hugs, Sarah
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Facial hair removal is easy enough to explain. You can claim difficult with ingrown hair or skin irritation from shaving. Another approach is to have your treatment spread across the face so the hair is thinned out instead of removed in spots. My hair was thinned and I only received one comment. I was asked if I had indian blood because of the spareness of my facial hair. This would not have normally been noticed except I was growing out for a treatment.
Quote from: Dena on February 15, 2017, 10:12:57 PM
Facial hair removal is easy enough to explain. You can claim difficult with ingrown hair or skin irritation from shaving. Another approach is to have your treatment spread across the face so the hair is thinned out instead of removed in spots. My hair was thinned and I only received one comment. I was asked if I had indian blood because of the spareness of my facial hair. This would not have normally been noticed except I was growing out for a treatment.
Hummm!... Interesting!... I didn't think about that "excuse"! I guess I'm going to consider electro sooner than I initially thought! Thanks! [emoji5]
Hugs, Sarah
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Don't know about the rest of the world of course.. But in Norway it is not that uncommon for men to do laser hair removal so they do not have to shave, I have met plenty who have! I'm with Sophia, absolutely start getting rid of those hairs as soon as possible. I'm almost facial hair free now -after nearly a year and a half of sessions- and it is absolutely awesome. There are something like 20-30 visible hairs remaining, with perhaps as many hidden that will grow in the next cycle.
Added benefit; when you don't have to shave your skin takes less damage and looks even better ;D
Sarah, you may want to reconsider IPL treatments and go for a combination of laser and electrolysis (if you need it) instead. I know girls that have wasted lots of time and money on IPL without great results. True lasers are much better...safer and more effective.
Quote from: Floof on February 16, 2017, 01:39:55 AM
Don't know about the rest of the world of course.. But in Norway it is not that uncommon for men to do laser hair removal so they do not have to shave, I have met plenty who have! I'm with Sophia, absolutely start getting rid of those hairs as soon as possible. I'm almost facial hair free now -after nearly a year and a half of sessions- and it is absolutely awesome. There are something like 20-30 visible hairs remaining, with perhaps as many hidden that will grow in the next cycle.
Added benefit; when you don't have to shave your skin takes less damage and looks even better ;D
Never really noticed that, here in Belgium. I did notice that it is not uncommon at all for men to shave their body, though. I've been thinking about the issue and I increasingly believe that nobody would really care if I got rid of my facial hair... So I think I will do it without much second thoughts... I'll start looking for someone who does facial electrolysis on men. Thanks, Floof!
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Quote from: staciM on February 16, 2017, 12:17:22 PM
Sarah, you may want to reconsider IPL treatments and go for a combination of laser and electrolysis (if you need it) instead. I know girls that have wasted lots of time and money on IPL without great results. True lasers are much better...safer and more effective.
Hi Stacy! Actually, I already have an IPL machine that I'm using for the rest of my body, so I won't really spend "extra" money. So I might as well try it and in the worst case scenario it will not be effective on facial hair (the machine, a Philips SC2009/00, does include a facial attachment) and I'll be loosing some time (a few weeks)... If I see no results whatsoever after 4-5 sessions, I'll simply give up and opt for one of the other two solutions (laser of electrolysis). But I'm well aware that IPL is not as effective as the other solutions, alas. Thanks for your advice! :-)
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^ ah, makes sense if you already have it. Hopefully it works well for you.
This definitely and those eyebrows need work too. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Cindy on February 15, 2017, 03:55:30 AM
Honey,
First you have great potential! Just look at the Before and After thread.
Second: never use your partners clothes or make up unless they allow it. It is a car crash waiting to happen when they find out.
I can tell exactly where my lipstick, eyeshadow, moisturiser are from day to day. I think most women do.
It is also unhygienic.
I think you'll be fine. Moreover, I think a little bit of FFS and no one will even suspect.
I had FFS in April 2015. In the last 8 months, I've encountered people who knew the old me and they didn't even recognize me. So it's definitely possible.
Quote from: staciM on February 17, 2017, 03:13:56 PM
^ ah, makes sense if you already have it. Hopefully it works well for you.
I hope so, but I know for sure that I will eventually need electrolysis (I have a few white hairs at the chin, so IPL and laser won't be effective). But if I manage to get rid of just 10% (about 4000 follicles, I'd dare to say) of my facial hair with IPL, it will already be a very significant saving on electrolysis! [emoji4]
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Quote from: LizMarie on February 17, 2017, 04:29:04 PM
I think you'll be fine. Moreover, I think a little bit of FFS and no one will even suspect.
I had FFS in April 2015. In the last 8 months, I've encountered people who knew the old me and they didn't even recognize me. So it's definitely possible.
Thank you for your encouraging words, Liz! I, too, feel that way. I think that for someone who is almost 45 years-old, my facial structure and complexion are far from a lost cause. With HRT (hopefully starting around september or october), proper skin care, electrolysis and a bit of FFS (and of course a lot of behavioral re-education, voice training and probably breast augmentation surgery [although my moobs already fill decently a B cup, despite having a BMI of "only" 29.8]), I think I'll be able to discretely live my life as the woman I've always been. I don't want to be a supermodel... Just a plain (preferably somewhat cute) girl... 💁
Hugs and thanks again for your kind words!
Sarah
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Quote from: Mariah on February 17, 2017, 03:16:47 PM
This definitely and those eyebrows need work too. Hugs
Mariah
Thanks Mariah! I wish it was only my eyebrows that needed work! 😄 Well, the "good"news is that I didn't do any work on those brows, yet, so the the potential is still intact! I like to look at the glass half full... 😉 On the other hand, I don't want them over-plucked - Lily Collins, Cara Delevingne and Hilary Rhoda all have thick eyebrows and I wouldn't mind looking like them any day! But I understand what you mean... I intend to "do" my eyebrows progressively so people (especially at work) won't be asking too much questions just yet. I'll be plucking a couple of hairs every other day and in a few weeks (months?) my eyebrows will look much more feminine and almost nobody will have noticed the change (except those who haven't seen me in a while). Thanks for your feedback!
Hugs, Sarah
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