As I posted here before, I met with a psychiatrist for a mental health intake assessment with the VA last month.
I just got to read her report from that visit.
It says though I have had suicidal thoughts, coming close to trying it once, and having had similar thoughts a few time since I am deemed not to be a risk. My guns are not deemed a risk to my well being. Neither am I at risk of doing harm to others. It says I feel isolated but have support through an online support group. I wonder what group that may be... I have good problem solving and coping skills.
Now the good part,(Ithink it's a good part) I saw it right there in print.
"Diagnosis - Gender Dysphoria"
It's official. I do not identify well with my assigned gender at birth.
I think that's good? I'm not just a nut that likes to dress up as a woman.
Hugs,
Jeanette
Although I believe that doctors should not decide our gender and that ultimately we are the only ones who can truly decide or feel our own gender, I'm glad that they see that you are not a risk to yourself or anybody else if they just let you move on with your life as you see fit and they have given you the diagnosis which will help with that. Congrats!
Yes, I think there needs to be a diagnosis, "gender dysphoria" or whatever to sort out a suitable treatment plan. I mean you've got to call it something and start somewhere. Of course only you can know if the diagnosis sits well with you.
For me it was a help to know that there wasn't any underlying mental health issues, and I didn't mind the label as I already identified with it.
A clinical opinion is just an acknowledgement that what we are experiencing is real. It offers up some protections and maybe new ways to explore our feelings that we didn't have access to before. A gender therapist, HRT, surgeries, if those are the paths you want to follow. For everyone it will be different, so hook up your GPS girl, only you can plot the rout and destination, it might cost a bit to get there, but at least your on your way.
Just my ramblings, but that's kind of how I felt after similar assessment results.
shy
Thank you for your thoughts Lynne.
I mentioned the other stuff more as humor. I knew all that before but it is what the psychiatrist has to do as part of the initial intake assessment. The diagnosis on other hand made me feel good. I took it as a confirmation of these mixed up feelings I have had.
You have to understand that i have not really felt this dysphoria of which everyone speaks. If I have had it , it was likely lessened and hidden by my long long history of crossdressing with undefined feeling that I might like to have been a girl. I grew up with 5 sisters. Many were the times I envied what they had and what they did.
I did not expect to see the diagnosis yet, thinking it would be something arrived at with a gender therapist. But seeing it in her report was affirming for me and I liked seeing it in print.
I hope you can understand a bit better what it did for me.
Hugs,
Jeanette
Thanks Shy for the encouragement
Congratulations on your diagnosis, Jeanette! It is like having a ticket on the next train. All aboard!
Quote from: JeanetteLW on March 04, 2017, 03:10:17 PM
You have to understand that i have not really felt this dysphoria of which everyone speaks.
I used to think that, too. To recognize dysphoria, I would have had to identify that
this is dysphoria and
that isn't. But there was no "that" in my life that wasn't dysphoric. My entire life was dysphoria, so I had no frame of reference with which to recognize it.
Now, I am starting to undertand it.
Quote from: KathyLauren on March 05, 2017, 06:44:37 AM
Congratulations on your diagnosis, Jeanette! It is like having a ticket on the next train. All aboard!
I used to think that, too. To recognize dysphoria, I would have had to identify that this is dysphoria and that isn't. But there was no "that" in my life that wasn't dysphoric. My entire life was dysphoria, so I had no frame of reference with which to recognize it.
Now, I am starting to understand it.
Hi Kathy,
I would tend to agree with what you say. I have likely been dysphoric throughout my life and did not recognize it. That is what I was trying to convey. I think my crossdressing history was probably a way of coping / appeasing it even though it caused it's own stress, worry, guilt and wreaked havoc on my now defunct marriage.
Hugs,
Jeanette
not to derail but i need massive mental help :/