Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Topic started by: Denise on March 12, 2017, 08:54:17 PM

Title: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: Denise on March 12, 2017, 08:54:17 PM
I'm assuming everyone who goes out in public on this forum is basically paranoid that people are thinking .... let's just say ungood thoughts about you. 

Well I've been wanting to know for real "Do I pass" or are people just being nice.  I want someone to follow behind me to a store or something and ask the clerk after I left "Well tell me about your last customer."  Tonight I had such an opportunity.

Tonight I was at a casual pizza restaurant with a married couple and a long time (female) friend of theirs stopped by the table.  They chatted for about 5 minutes and then she left.  Ah HA!  The perfect opportunity.  I asked them to ask her, the next time they spoke with their "visitor" friend to ask if they had any idea about me.

Well they stopped of at her table as I was walking out of the restaurant and they asked.  SHE HAD NO IDEA!

I have been looking for an opportunity to run that test.  And I got a passing grade!!!!!

YIPPEE!
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 12, 2017, 09:55:48 PM
 Congrats Denise,
  Affirmation can be a heady thing. It is a good thing to know yes but don't let it go to your head lest they clock you by that. Overlarge heads are a dead giveaway. LOL

   Seriously Denise I'm happy for you getting the results you were after.

  Hugs,
   Jeanette
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: Denise on March 12, 2017, 10:12:31 PM
Quote from: JeanetteLW on March 12, 2017, 09:55:48 PM
... Overlarge heads are a dead giveaway. LOL

   Seriously Denise I'm happy for you getting the results you were after.

That's funny...  The results I'm after - not yet.  FFS (chin, lips, nose, eyes) consultation at the end of May.  (I waited less time for Hormone prescription)
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 12, 2017, 10:24:30 PM
Quote from: Denise on March 12, 2017, 10:12:31 PM
That's funny...  The results I'm after - not yet.  FFS (chin, lips, nose, eyes) consultation at the end of May.  (I waited less time for Hormone prescription)

Now, now, Denise We were talking about the desired results for your test only. We both know the rest is still a work in progress. (in my case it prolly will be  ForEver!)

Baby steps, Denise baby steps

  Hugs,
   Jeanette
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: LizK on March 13, 2017, 06:27:24 AM
Denise

I read a biography where a trans woman got her friend to follow along behind her with a video camera as she went about a few normal tasks out in the world. This told her all she  needed to know.... Her observations were very confronting and whilst she used them positively she was devastated by her results.

Thing about passing I have noticed and I don't know wether I do or I don't pass but I am not that fussed if I don't...I am working as hard as I can on self acceptance and each and every time I start to think about passing I stop myself and talk it through in my head. It gets a little easier each time..so each time I go out into the world, it becomes easier and you think less about other people, the less you think about them the less stressed, more confident and natural you look.... and that probably helps you in passing...just my thoughts

Liz
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: Denise on March 13, 2017, 09:12:25 PM
Quote from: JeanetteLW on March 12, 2017, 10:24:30 PM
Now, now, Denise We were talking about the desired results for your test only. ...
Sorry tongue and cheek only.

Quote from: ElizabethK on March 13, 2017, 06:27:24 AM

Thing about passing I have noticed and I don't know whether I do or I don't pass but I am not that fussed if I don't...I am working as hard as I can on self acceptance and each and every time I start to think about passing I stop myself and talk it through in my head. It gets a little easier each time..so each time I go out into the world, it becomes easier and you think less about other people, the less you think about them the less stressed, more confident and natural you look.... and that probably helps you in passing...just my thoughts

Liz - I agree that it's more a frame/state of mind about passing.  Being comfortable and confident is key.  And on occasion I get clocked and I actually think it's more fun/funny than a problem.  I like to see other's reactions when they figure it out.

It's amazing the different reactions.  My wife and I frequent one particular restaurant and yesterday I went with some other friends but I got there first.  I sat in our usual seat and the waiter, who I've known for YEARS, didn't even bat an eye.  My guess is he was "warned" ahead of time by other servers since I was just in there the day before.  But his reaction was scary too - NONE.

Thanks all for your comments.  The original post was due to not being able to stop smiling.  :)
Title: Re: Yippee - confirmed
Post by: JeanetteLW on March 13, 2017, 09:46:54 PM
Quote from: Denise on March 13, 2017, 09:12:25 PM
Sorry tongue and cheek only.

Me too, me too no need to be sorry

  Hugs,
   Jeanette