I have till date come out to 4 of my close friends. 3 out of them have broken all contact with me, they don't reply to my texts, they have stopped calling me completely, nor do they smile when they see me.
Today, I came out to another of my close friends, friend no. 5 . He has been ignoring all my calls since morning, he has seen my texts, but hasn't replied.
I feel like I'm losing so much of my social circle. I don't know if I'll have any friends left, after I come out to everyone.
Is there some way I can be accepted by my friends? Should I do something differently? Is it my fault I don't have any friends to talk to? Am I expecting too much from them?
Quote from: Saira128 on March 17, 2017, 10:42:15 AM
I have till date come out to 4 of my close friends. 3 out of them have broken all contact with me, they don't reply to my texts, they have stopped calling me completely, nor do they smile when they see me.
Today, I came out to another of my close friends, friend no. 5 . He has been ignoring all my calls since morning, he has seen my texts, but hasn't replied.
I feel like I'm losing so much of my social circle. I don't know if I'll have any friends left, after I come out to everyone.
Is there some way I can be accepted by my friends? Should I do something differently? Is it my fault I don't have any friends to talk to? Am I expecting too much from them?
Give them time to process. This is a big change for them as well as for you.
As to friends, those that don't come back after a while weren't really friends to begin with. For me I have not told one of my friends yet. My only other friend is willing to help me with choosing my make up and style choices.
I have also been telling my coworkers at a rate of about 1 per week. So far everyone of them has been very accepting of it. Some of them, while discussing it, had commented about how happy I have appeared over the past few months, and were happy to find out why.
QuoteI don't know if I'll have any friends left, after I come out to everyone.
What kind of friends might those be that don't care about what actually makes you happy?
Oh god, I don't have any good friends.
I really don't have anyone.
I'm so lucky I was a social oddball, atleast friends is something I don't really have to deal with lol
Jeeezz listens to me haha sad :')
Quote from: Saira128 on March 18, 2017, 01:02:29 AM
I really don't have anyone.
You have us.
Don't count them out yet. Remember that this is a big change that you are asking them to accept. Give them time to process it. You've had time to process your feelings, don't expect them to immediately accept it, they need time to process as well.
Give them a chance and if they were ever really your friends they will come round...you may need to be a little more patient with them.
Liz
This all sounds very familiar... I too lost almost all of my friends when I came out. But:
You can also look at it the other way: if those people immediately broke off all contact, they weren't friends at all in the first place. They liked you because of convenience, you fulfilled a purpose to them, and since you're different now, they're turning away. Good for you! This will give you the freedom to find a new circle!
The definition of a friend
A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations.
When I came out to my friends, they were understanding and have supported me all the way. I have even been offered a place to stay if ever needed. I have known these people for many years.
I have also lost friends, A couple of them very dear to me but they were just to heterosexuality and could not handle it.
Then I had a couple friends that after a few months of no contact I get a text saying they may have over reacted and that we should get together.
Point is you have to let people process this. Its a huge change in peoples lives. You will loose some friends, you will keep some and most importantly you will make new friends. You have many friends on this board so you are never alone Hon.
Be patient, don't push them, give them a chance.
Huggs Niki