Hey ladies! I am planning to live as a female openly once I finally figure out how to move away from good ol Nova Scotia, but am currently moving in with a roomate and am closeted in my CDing for now. The question I have is that I am too scared to buy stuff at the store (like many of us) and want to figure out my proper fitting size etc, and be able to order clothing online to fit my needs, however I'm scared of a package coming to my building and me not being there to get it and my roomate grabbing it and knowing that what ive ordered is womens clothes/sex toys/lingerie etc... Are there any discreet packaging places to order from? How do you order your girlclothes if you do? Any other ideas for obtaining clothing discreetly?
I know this has probably been asked a million times but hey here it is again haha.
I need to start figuring out what types of clothing goes with what and what looks too trashy together etc...very limited amount of girl clothes with me that i lug around in a plastic garbage bag when I move lol
P.O. box? Or UPS will "ship and hold" which means you'll be notified the package is at the local terminal for pickup.
Hugs, Devlyn
If you order through Amazon you could see if they have a "Locker" nearby. Pretty much a self-serb station where you can pick up your Amazon package.
Otherwise PO box as suggested...
Hmmm maybe ill look into the PO box thing
In the end it will also depend where you order. Amazon for example you can always say it is something for a hobby or a friend or something else. I have done that multiple times when I ordered yet another pair of shoes...
Some of the larger retailers offer both male and female clothing, so it would most likely not raise any suspicion either (unless someone opens you boxes).
Lastly: I know you are afraid of shopping in person. So was I and initially I pretended to buy for someone else. Later when I had a bit more courage I started shopping far away from my home town where no one really knew me (had some great experience in Toronto). Not sure if this is a possibility for you.
So do you feel embarrassed shopping or worry what the store assistant thinks (they don't its just another transaction in a boring day).I just browse in the sale section ,see some thing I like in my size(that's the think knowing what will fit) and get it.
Usually when I order from Ebay and Amazon, the packages come in anonymous. No one can tell what is inside them. Even I was surprise one day when package came in after almost 8 weeks later from Hong Kong.
I have used birthdays and Christmas to order clothing items for female relatives and threw in items for myself too. You know one foe her two for me....
Hugs,
Jeanette
My mom had this sent here, its for my girlfriend, none of your dam business, I am buying gifts for, Mother, sister, girlfriend ,aunt ,cousin , friend...I will open it later my (insert female her) asked me to get it delivered here....or Its mine...you are fine with that aren't you!!
All valid answers
Most packages I get from Department stores at best will have the store name on it. They could contain anything and the packing slip detailing the items is usually inside the box. The more casual and dismissive you are of the package the less your room mate will care about it...however acting funny and drawing attention to it would be suspicious...When you room mate gets packages what do you think? They probably think the same
Liz
I use the UPS hold at a local UPS store near my office. It's free unlike a PO box, but it can be unobvious how to get Amazon to ship UPS rather than postal. I have to get online to UPS after the package is shipped and reroute it to the store.
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In the UK most clothe stores are partnered with this 'click & collect' service where pretty much most convenience type stores are involved with, order the clothes and they're delivered to the store and you get a text saying it's there and you just go and collect it, think it's free too over a certain amount.
Also Amazon here have 'Amazon Lockers' where you order stuff and it gets put in the locker which is in quite a few grocery stores and you just type the code and it opens a door and your stuff is in there, I use this quite a bit with all my Amazon orders since I don't have to worry about being out when the postman comes also it seems to get your stuff quicker, ordered something at like 9pm last night and it was here today. ;D
Do you have services similar where you are?
Along these lines, but I am a little old school so my experience lies in going in person. If you pick up one item that would always be assumed to be a gift(like flowers) and then clothes shop, anyone would assume that the clothes are a gift. I did that for a while, and then after I've truly decided that my buying habits are none of anyone's business, It is clear to me that people still assume I'm gift shopping. [emoji12] By and large, it's a matter of you trying to feel more comfortable because usually people know to mind their own business.
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Y.O.L.O it and go with amazon?
Yes to them thinking you're gift shopping. A year ago, before I was out to myself, I bought a top for my wife. To check the size I held it up to my own torso, since I know how we compare. I liked doing that :-) but I felt compelled to say something to the clerk to justify my action. But really, there was never a question that I was buying a gift.
Amazon is my friend.Gift wrap is available to give yourself a nice descrete present😃
I see that you are a fellow Canadian. Canada Post has the perfect free solution for you called FlexDelivery. It allows people to have their online orders shipped to their nearest Canada Post outlet and when the package arrives, you are notified by email that your package is ready for pickup. I have consistently used this service without any problems.
Elli
Amazon is pretty discreet - no telling what is in the plain box, and most sex toy vendors are VERY discreet - return addresses usually do not even have the name of the company - it reads things like "Warehouse, 123 Main Street, State of Confusion, 12345
I find that click & collect from the store is the most discreet, particularly if you buy several items and it's a big anonymous package.
The mail can be most embarrassing, as sometimes the package contents are listed and they get delivered to next door.
I almost had a package clearly labelled "dual electric breast pumps" delivered to the neighbour, and I have had several bags delivered next door containing bras clearly identified by the shape of the underwires.
On the other had, I have had a couple of lovely eBay transactions where the seller obviously knew I was CD, and asked about my boobs. She said "lots of my customers are men!"
The mail can be most embarrassing, as sometimes the package contents are listed and they get delivered to next door.
On a similar vain, I had purchased breast forms and requested they be delivered to my PO box. I put my daughters name on the order not thinking there was a problem and once I got them home nobody would ask questions because it had her name and I could just say she is coming to pick the package up. Unfortunately the Post Office would not deliver them to my PO Box and instead used my daughters name to look up her address. Imagine my horror when I found out they had been delivered to her house. They opened them up and finally realized what they were and then the fun began. Photos to facebook. Laughs were had by all and then I got the call. You should see what I got in the mail today. I think I crapped my panties. I explained it was probably just some cruel joke and I would return them for her. All was well until about 6 weeks later when she went searching for something in my closet and came across "the box"
Also Amazon has remote delivery. Ours is located at the nearby Safeway store. It is a set of lockers they deliver the goods and you pick them up.
I've bought a lot of things on eBay. Since eBay things come from individuals in all sorts of packages it's usually impossible to know what's inside before opening. Of course, you can also find a lot of bargains on clothes, which is one of the most competitive categories for sellers. Being in the US, I avoid the China stuff, which can take a long time to arrive. I've learned to pretty well distinguish a reliable seller from a questionable one, too.
The down side of eBay is you may not be able to return it if it doesn't fit, so avoid purchases with tricky sizing. I've given up trying to buy jeans online at all. But things like tops and jackets or anything with an elastic waist can be easy enough to fit.
When it comes to retail clerks. Nobody cares! Seriously. They all have their own movie going on.
I go into Pennington's here. The sale clerks are great. I let them know that the close are for me and they make suggestions and I have no problem trying everything onto see what I like best. They are fantastic.
I used to buy from a store where 3 older women worked. They couldn't do enough to help me. They'd often make suggestions too. You can also try used clothing stores, to stretch your budget.
Hi Brittany,
Have you thought about maybe just telling your roommate and gaining freedom to cross dress in your apartment?
If you haven't signed a lease, and still looking for a roommate, you can mention something like 'non-gender-conforming', or something like that and weed out intolerant ones right away.
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