Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Kaylin on April 26, 2017, 02:55:10 PM

Title: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: Kaylin on April 26, 2017, 02:55:10 PM
First I want to explain my worries, and then I'm very curious to hear experiences and opinions :)  I'm not actually undergoing transition yet, this is my worries for the future.

1. I feel like I will end up dating a trans person. Obviously that isn't a problem haha  What I mean is, I feel like due to the problems with dating cis people and the fact that I naturally am meeting lots of trans people, it is simply likely that people I develop relationships with will by chance be trans. Is this common?

2. I don't plan to get SRS unless I really feel that I need it after a good period of time on HRT, although I won't discount it. I do worry that I will either date a trans woman who has had SRS and isn't interested in a women with a penis or a trans man who has had SRS and doesn't want a woman with a penis. I worry that I will end up getting SRS just to allow me to have a relationship. Any thoughts?

3. I would like to have kids one day. I am aware of the technicalities of this for trans people, but I don't know if it really happens. I mean I still get annoyed because people have a problem with gay couples having children, what the hell do they think about trans people having children?


Feel free to chime  :angel:
Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: dre_moe on April 26, 2017, 07:10:59 PM
I just made a poll to see how many trans people are even willing to date other trans people.  You definitely won't be limited to only other trans people.  I'm currently dating a cis woman and I am pre HRT but she accepts me as me, Andre.  I start HRT this summer and my top surgery is scheduled this winter.  I identify as a heterosexual so I'm only attracted to women cis or trans doesn't matter to me.  SRS or not.  I definitely would not touch her wiener though lol.  Not on some it's gross thing or whatever, it's just as a trans dude, I'd have some dysphoria and be a little jealous.  One of my military friends used to say lesbians have penis envy lol.  I think I would a bit.
Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: Debra on April 26, 2017, 07:49:47 PM
I dated a couple guys in my transition and ended up with a cis-man. I'd say don't pidgen-hole yourself into categories.
Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: Sophia Sage on April 27, 2017, 10:05:26 AM
I don't think you can really know, this far in advance, how your sexuality is going to turn out.  It is by no means assured!

Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: BrittanyRose on April 27, 2017, 10:08:18 AM
I've had these thoughts before too. I mean there are plenty of guys who like transgender women but also there is the problem of some of them only being in it as a fetish etc which is a bummer. But there are definitely men who legitamitely dint care about a penis...itll be hard to weed them out though. I'm a bit worried myself for this too but I'm sure its all in how patient we are we will find who we want! :)
Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: pretty pauline on April 27, 2017, 05:00:49 PM
Quote from: Debra on April 26, 2017, 07:49:47 PM
I dated a couple guys in my transition and ended up with a cis-man. I'd say don't pidgen-hole yourself into categories.
Quote from: Sophia Sage on April 27, 2017, 10:05:26 AM
I don't think you can really know, this far in advance, how your sexuality is going to turn out.  It is by no means assured!


It's never a sure thing, like Debra I dated a few men, but nobody was more surprised than myself when I ended up actually marrying a cis- man, he is now my husband for 7 years.
Title: Re: Dating as a MtF Transgender Person
Post by: Lady Sarah on April 27, 2017, 11:08:54 PM
Not only have I dated men that do not care about the penis, I married one. Sure, many cis men are superficial, but that does not mean they all are. A great many just want someone to come home to, and love.