Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Non-Transitioning and Detransitioning => Topic started by: Charlie Nicki on May 03, 2017, 08:49:09 PM

Title: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Charlie Nicki on May 03, 2017, 08:49:09 PM
So I ran into this video on youtube by chance and it, as someone who is still discovering their gender, it really worried me. Especially after reading the comments where there's a lot of people who said they also thought they were transgender but then realized they weren't, it was just that they didn't act stereotypically like their assigned gender. Here's the video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4IR2dGhiXM&

What do you think? This is the sort of thing that I'm scared if it happens to me. What if I'm kidding myself and I end up realizing I wasn't transgender... just that I wasn't the image of what a man is supposed to be that I had in my mind and therefore thought the only other option was to be a girl :( it really scares me.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: AnonyMs on May 04, 2017, 01:04:18 AM
I don't see a video - just a big empty space? Whats the name of the video/channel? I can search for it.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Geeker on May 04, 2017, 08:43:49 AM
ditto, no vid.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Charlie Nicki on May 04, 2017, 08:45:36 AM
Sorry! Don't know what happened before but it's embedded now. It's called "Why I Transitioned / Detransitioned" by account Frankological. Here's the link again: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4IR2dGhiXM&
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Violets on May 04, 2017, 09:13:08 AM
Sounds like he never had dysphoria. Nothing wrong with being an effeminate guy and wanting to express that femininity, but this on its own doesn't make you a good candidate for medical transition.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Elis on May 05, 2017, 06:34:36 AM
A lot of people stop medically transioning either due to finding people's disapproval too hard to cope with or because they realise they're more trans nb than trans binary so realise HRT didn't quite suit them but ofc many people ignore nb being a real thing and assume they're not really trans.

Any all that matters is how you feel about your gender presently. If you're unhappy now about it then some sort of transitioning is most likely the best thing for you.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Charlie Nicki on May 05, 2017, 11:40:02 AM
Quote from: Elis on May 05, 2017, 06:34:36 AM
A lot of people stop medically transioning either due to finding people's disapproval too hard to cope with or because they realise they're more trans nb than trans binary so realise HRT didn't quite suit them but ofc many people ignore nb being a real thing and assume they're not really trans.

Any all that matters is how you feel about your gender presently. If you're unhappy now about it then some sort of transitioning is most likely the best thing for you.

Sounds reasonable. What's transgender NB? Non binary? Do you think being non-binary has a lot to do with not taking hormones?
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: RobynD on May 05, 2017, 12:14:00 PM
I agree with the replies here. Expression can change like anything else in life and if there is little or no GD to begin with, than its totally an issue of personal expression.

Correct me if i am wrong but medical transition including hormones is not limited to one place on the transgender spectrum right? I had always believed NB, Gender Fluid and other folks could and sometimes do use medical means. I had always assumed they just have to use a somewhat different strategy to obtain them using informed consent.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Thessa on May 05, 2017, 12:53:31 PM
Quote from: Charlie Nicki on May 05, 2017, 11:40:02 AM
Sounds reasonable. What's transgender NB? Non binary? Do you think being non-binary has a lot to do with not taking hormones?
Sometimes I think that I'm non-binary but I don't know what cause that. I feel a strong disconnect to my current body but in different social area I'm (still) somewhat fine with presenting male. On the other hand when presenting female it just feels right.

Maybe it's just the fear of what the economic future will bring, that causes this feeling.

I think it's everyone's personal decision what transitioning includes, regardless if that person is NB or Binary.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Devlyn on May 05, 2017, 01:04:45 PM
Quote from: RobynD on May 05, 2017, 12:14:00 PM
I agree with the replies here. Expression can change like anything else in life and if there is little or no GD to begin with, than its totally an issue of personal expression.

Correct me if i am wrong but medical transition including hormones is not limited to one place on the transgender spectrum right? I had always believed NB, Gender Fluid and other folks could and sometimes do use medical means. I had always assumed they just have to use a somewhat different strategy to obtain them using informed consent.

I have a firm belief that telling my doctor anything other than the straight truth is not to my benefit. I told my doctor that I was genderfluid and did not identify as a woman, but that I was presenting as one and wanted hormones for feminization. She had no problems with that at all.

So, if going in and telling the truth is the strategy, then yeah, we use it, too.  :)

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 05, 2017, 01:42:55 PM
When I first realized thst was trans I had no real interest in changing my presentation. I wanted hormones only for the mental effects. As time went on I began to desire the physical feminization as much as the stabilizing effects of running my brain on estrogen. Ultimately I changed​ my presentation, my documentation, almost everything. I feel no need for GRS beyond my fear of being in a nursing home with mismatched genitals and my irritation with a nearly non-functional penis being in the way.

My point is that, as I've changed, my needs and wants have evolved too. I'm on a long journey and none of us can be entirely sure where that journey will take us
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Elis on May 05, 2017, 02:33:45 PM
Yeah nb is under the trans umbrella even though some people think it isn't  (trans people too strangely as well). Yeah nb can want to take hormones to align a particular way (me included) but I meant nb people who may take T for example and may realise on T they don't actually feel mostly male as they once thought or vise versa for nb people taking estrogen. I'm an nb person who takes T bcos my brain is wired mostly male so I need T to stop dysphoria but I also feel somewhat agender.

Hope this makes sense.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Georgette on May 05, 2017, 03:58:18 PM
Agree this person probably did not have full GD.

That is the whole reason for therapy 1st then RLE and HRT, to find out if being TG/TS is really what you need.
Doesn't sound like he had an therapy.

Part of this confusion is over what and how much transition one needs.  Good for him he did not get any surgeries.

Not sure I would call this de-transition.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Charlie Nicki on May 05, 2017, 04:00:51 PM
Quote from: Georgette on May 05, 2017, 03:58:18 PM
That is the whole reason for therapy 1st then RLE and HRT, to find out if being TG/TS is really what you need.
Doesn't sound like he had an therapy.

I think you have a point there, I hadn't thought about that.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Dena on May 05, 2017, 04:06:16 PM
Something I ran across on this site is suppressing the birth hormones of a gender fluid/bigender person may stop the gender identity switching. This alone would be enough to consider giving hormone therapy to a non binary person. The other flavors of non binary also experience dysphoria and I see no reason why one portion of the transgender should receive hormone therapy and another should not when both may benefit for hormone therapy.

Unfortunately not all of the medical community agrees with this concept as the non binary is not as well understood as the transsexual community is.
Title: Re: Your thoughts on this detransition video story (triggers maybe)
Post by: Georgette on May 07, 2017, 12:44:37 AM
Not arguing that only TG/TS should get HRT.  But if therapy and understanding just what HRT will and won't do, may have given him better options.

Even though I didn't go through all that therapy stuff.  I can see where some can benefit to determine where and how much one needs to do.

As I said it sounds like he didn't get any, just followed the crowd of others.