Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: AlyssaJ on May 05, 2017, 12:21:13 AM

Title: I purged today....
Post by: AlyssaJ on May 05, 2017, 12:21:13 AM
Calm down, not that kind of purge. This was a good thing, I purged a large portion of my male clothes.  As most of you know, my wife is really not dealing with my transition at all.  She's not seen me as Alyssa (not even in pictures) and can't even look at any of my female belongings. So to try and help her let go, I'm moving into our guest bedroom on the lower level.  It's the same guest bedroom that has the closet that I've been using to store my female wardrobe in while I'm still living the double life.

So as I've been moving things into that room, I've been finding that trying to fit two wardrobes in there just isn't going to work.  So slowly tonight I realized that I needed to let go and just simply get rid of much of those male clothes.  As I really thought about it, I don't need 40 T-shirts when 10-15 will do.  I don't need all those polo shirts that I only wear rarely anyway (and will wear even less often going forward).  So I ended up filling 2 garbage bags full.  One bag goes to Goodwill the other was things that couldn't be donated so out in the trash they go.

Honestly, at first it was a little bittersweet.  Lots of memories attached to some of those clothes.  But by the end I was really getting excited and looking forward to my first night in my new bedroom which if all goes well will be tomorrow night.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Laurie on May 05, 2017, 12:32:00 AM
  Alyssa,

  (Cheers, applause, kudos, etc) 
   Well done Alyssa! I know it's not a complete switch but by golly it's a darned good beginning. I have thought of doing some of the same but haven't as yet. Heck, I still have my "as needed" tighty whities in case I might run into a need to drop my drawers. (Like every 3 months for my CT scan) I may just let the techs see my panties on the 15th..
  Anyway I can see where it can be a refreshing thing to do. Another step in the process of becoming you and leaving that male life behind. You will do this Alyssa. One step at a time you will get it done and really have a new beginning.

  Hugs,
    Laurie
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: coldHeart on May 05, 2017, 04:42:09 AM
My I thought you had a complete change of mind when I read the post title, problem is your bound to get more girlie outfits so your run out of space AGAIN I will be good to have your own space.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: AnneK on May 05, 2017, 05:07:52 AM
QuoteHeck, I still have my "as needed" tighty whities in case I might run into a need to drop my drawers.

I haven't worn male underwear in at least 20 years.  In fact, I no longer own any.  These days I wear only pantyhose for underwear.

Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: SailorMars1994 on May 05, 2017, 07:17:16 AM
A much better post then I thought I was going to read!! phew, your headline scared me for a second there girl xD
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Denise on May 05, 2017, 09:04:12 AM
Glad to hear the true meaning of purging for you.  :)

I still have all my male clothes because some (some polos etc....) I could probably still wear.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Tommi on May 05, 2017, 03:58:25 PM
My wife asked me id i was going to get rid of all of my male goth/dressy clothes... I told her, nah, I don't mind cross-dressing sometimes ;)

--
"You do realize, this means you get to do character creation & the newbie zone all over again? :D"

Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Rambler on May 05, 2017, 04:24:26 PM
I keep eyeing my male wardrobe wondering when I'll finally bite the bullet and discard it all. I pretty much only wear it my boy clothes work and around family anyways, anytime that I'm around the house I'm in female clothes, usually lounge or everyday wear so I look, but I'm just not ready to let go yet.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Devlyn on May 05, 2017, 04:53:11 PM
My camouflage BDU's and field jacket with my old name on it are still around. I don't expect to get rid of them, that's a big piece of my history that I completely embrace.

They are the last male clothes left in my house.

Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: findingreason on May 05, 2017, 05:22:04 PM
Not gonna lie, you had me worried there for a minute with that title. :P But that is awesome! I remember the freeing feeling it had for me when I donated my old clothes. It's a great feeling. <3
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: TonyaW on May 05, 2017, 06:57:11 PM
Good for you Alyssa! 

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: CarlyMcx on May 06, 2017, 12:22:06 AM
I've been doing the same thing over the past year.  I send a lot of my stuff to my in laws in the Philippines where it gets put to good use.  Just about all of my stuff is mid level branded designer stuff and the folks over there love it.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Alex81 on May 06, 2017, 08:06:35 AM
I got really concerned for a bit thinking that you just had a fancy girls weekend and got all kinds of stuff only to purge it. :o

Glad I read the post. Hope everything works out for you.
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Balerie on May 06, 2017, 09:01:35 AM
I'm so happy for you. They are big steps towards being yourself.

I haven't done much of a purge yet because I'm still presenting male everywhere except when I'm home. The few things that I did purge were all my male jeans and underwear. I bagged those some time ago and never looked back. I also keep my small but ever growing female wardrobe in the walk in closet with the rest of our clothes. Funny thing is that my wife says I should keep some male underwear in case I have a doctor or hospital visit but I have no plans to ever go back to wearing them. They were the cause of much dysphoria.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Laurie on May 06, 2017, 11:43:53 AM
Quote from: MRV35 on May 06, 2017, 09:01:35 AM
I'm so happy for you. They are big steps towards being yourself.

Funny thing is that my wife says I should keep some male underwear in case I have a doctor or hospital visit but I have no plans to ever go back to wearing them. They were the cause of much dysphoria.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Hi MRV

  I am in transition. Okay so you knew that. But I mean I am at the crossroads between what your wife suggested and your own intentions on the subject. I've about made up my mind that the CT scan techs are just going to my panties when I drop my drawers as instructed for my next scan on the 15th. I think if I can go through with that I will no longer have need of my tighty whities. Then I can purge of them and have more room for my panties and bras.

  Hugs,
   Laurie
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Balerie on May 06, 2017, 12:10:51 PM
Laurie, it's all a matter of how comfortable we are with letting others see that side of us that me might not be quite ready to let everyone know about yet. I'm confident that medical professionals may wonder about it or might even have seen it more than we think. In any case, I find that with each passing day, I care less about what others may think and more about being the real me. It's a long process. I'm not ready to come out yet but I'm taking baby steps. These small steps get us ever so closer to the end game. I'm glad you've taken another step forward.

Hugs,
Balerie


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Rachel on May 06, 2017, 12:19:46 PM
Congratulations, I never would have thought it would have turned out the way it has with that title.

:)
Title: Re: I purged today....
Post by: Laurie on May 06, 2017, 12:42:39 PM
Quote from: MRV35 on May 06, 2017, 12:10:51 PM
I'm not ready to come out yet but I'm taking baby steps. These small steps get us ever so closer to the end game. I'm glad you've taken another step forward.

Hugs,
Balerie

  Balerie?

  MRV, do we finally have a real name for you? It is about time! I was thinking of asking about it on another post just a bit ago.

   I agree with you. We make no progress at all in this journey until we take a step. No matter how small or how big it is still progress toward our chosen goals.

   Hugs,
  Laurie
Title: I purged today....
Post by: Balerie on May 06, 2017, 04:23:55 PM
Well Laurie, not to derail this thread but for a long time I had chosen the name Valerie and it felt right, then my best friend told me of Balerie and because it's somewhat like my male name,she can call me that and no one is the wiser. So, no matter the setting, she'll call me Bal and only she and I know what she means. A slight variation but it works for now.

P.S. I don't know how or if I can change my username.

Hugs,
Balerie


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk