Ok first things first.
I don't know what i am anymore.
I'm a man who has loved wearing dresses and skirts as long as i can remember. And i have hid it from everyone except a few close friends.
I am not a passable woman and only wear lipstick and nail polish.
For the past week i have worn nothing but dresses and have gone out in public!
I have recieved no negative actions from others in the area o live. Went to gas stations, wal-mart, even went to Applebees for cocktails with my roommate. She has been extremely supportive.
I have been happier than i can remember ever being.
But i am afraid of when is the other shoe going to drop.
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Good for you for going out in public!
The other shoe might never drop. I expected a negative reaction from someone in this rednecky area. Maybe we just have a better class of rednecks here, because I have had none. When I started dressing, I didn't really pass. Now, I am full-time, and, thanks to HRT, getting more passable as time goes on. I have never had any problems.
It might depend on where you are and whom you associate with. But our fears can give us a false impression of the world. Most people aren't playing "spot the t****y".
Enjoy your outings.
Quote from: KathyLauren on July 06, 2017, 11:55:06 AM
Good for you for going out in public!
The other shoe might never drop. I expected a negative reaction from someone in this rednecky area. Maybe we just have a better class of rednecks here, because I have had none. When I started dressing, I didn't really pass. Now, I am full-time, and, thanks to HRT, getting more passable as time goes on. I have never had any problems.
It might depend on where you are and whom you associate with. But our fears can give us a false impression of the world. Most people aren't playing "spot the t****y".
Enjoy your outings.
Thank you so much.
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Congratulations on your excursions. I am glad you are having positive experiences. Although I have been out many times dressed few of those have been where I've had to interact with others. It can be nerve racking without someone there to support you. It is soooo much easier when you are with someone you trust.
I have found this out by running around this country for the last 4 weeks visiting many of the friends I've made here on the forums. I am becoming more comfortable as a woman in transition because of this trip but it is when I'm with one of these ladies here that I truly do not worry what others think of me. It has helped me accept myself too. I am learning who and what I am.
I wish you many more good experiences of discovery.
Hugs,
Laurie
Quote from: Laurie on July 06, 2017, 12:15:47 PM
Congratulations on your excursions. I am glad you are having positive experiences. Although I have been out many times dressed few of those have been where I've had to interact with others. It can be nerve racking without someone there to support you. It is soooo much easier when you are with someone you trust.
I have found this out by running around this country for the last 4 weeks visiting many of the friends I've made here on the forums. I am becoming more comfortable as a woman in transition because of this trip but it is when I'm with one of these ladies here that I truly do not worry what others think of me. It has helped me accept myself too. I am learning who and what I am.
I wish you many more good experiences of discovery.
Hugs,
Laurie
I hope you find the support you need. The hard part is going to places that know im a man.
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Congrats on going out in public. I haven't done it yet but I know having someone by your side makes it easier the first few times. After that you realize that people just don't pay close attention that much anymore.
I've been waiting for that other damn shoe for months and the closer I get to coming out publicly, the more I seem to expect it. I go out in public to safe spaces like voice lessons and therapy sessions while fully dressed, but just recently starting incorporating decidedly feminine elements into my wardrobe. For the 4th my wife & I took our daughter to a carnival and was wearing a feminine shirt, shorts, and a new pair of glasses that I just purchased to help complete the new look. I didn't get any negative comments, maybe a few looks, but overall a positive experience.
Just take it in stride and do what feels right. Screw everyone else.
Quote from: Rambler on July 06, 2017, 01:08:22 PM
I've been waiting for that other damn shoe for months and the closer I get to coming out publicly, the more I seem to expect it. I go out in public to safe spaces like voice lessons and therapy sessions while fully dressed, but just recently starting incorporating decidedly feminine elements into my wardrobe. For the 4th my wife & I took our daughter to a carnival and was wearing a feminine shirt, shorts, and a new pair of glasses that I just purchased to help complete the new look. I didn't get any negative comments, maybe a few looks, but overall a positive experience.
Just take it in stride and do what feels right. Screw everyone else.
Lol easier said than done. You are correct however as a nonpassable its is surprising me at the acceptance i have recieved. I get compliments on my blue hair and on my nails even on the dress.
But still expect laughter and pointing fingers and rude acts.
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So awesome and it definitely gets easier. As you feminize more, get more comfortable with yourself, find your fashion style etc it will bring a sort of momentum that is wonderful.
Quote from: marshall1958 on July 06, 2017, 11:30:25 AM
I have been happier than i can remember ever being.
But i am afraid of when is the other shoe going to drop.
Congratulations. Once your courage overcomes your fears, you gain a whole new world to explore. And the world is not as bad as it used to be towards us, thanks to the others who went out before.
As far as your concerns... not sure what are you afraid of? Do you wonder if you want suddenly to live full time or to have more permanent changes? It might happen (because of your newfound experiences might tell you to be brave again in following your heart), or might not. Going out in public wouldn't change who you are or what desires do you have, but only open up your horizons to go where you do want to go.
Quote from: RobynD on July 06, 2017, 03:32:26 PM
So awesome and it definitely gets easier. As you feminize more, get more comfortable with yourself, find your fashion style etc it will bring a sort of momentum that is wonderful.
This time i have decided to minimalize on makeup.
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On this side of the ditch have had no negatives, not been out in a dress in general view yet but was ok at a hot rod meet where I am known, no wig or make up mind but had breast forms on. More grief from wife and kids, mostly wife. Folks don't seem to care , maybe a few second takes as nail varnish and earrings confuse people when its not expected.
Your all lucky you do any thing like that were I live its a good kicking time.
Sara
Quote from: coldHeart on July 06, 2017, 05:47:08 PM
Your all lucky you do any thing like that were I live its a good kicking time.
Sara
I was terrified that would happen to me.
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Hi Marshall and welcome to the forum!!!
Congrats on the brave step forward to show the world and yourself a bit more of what you are about!... It is easy to picture our first ventures out into the world like the end of a Frankenstein movie where we end up being chased by angry villagers with torches and pitchforks but that is only because of human nature... Where there is an unknown about how others may react to something... We tend to insert our deepest fears to some degree!
If you are waiting for the other shoe to drop... It may be a long wait sister.. I have never had a truly negative reaction from anyone... If you are considering pursuing things further, don't let fear of the possibilities of others reactions rule your choices... You sound like you are exploring things and starting to realize much has been buried for a long time that needs to come out a bit more into the light!!!... Enjoy the exploration!!!
Onward we go brave sister
Ashley :)
Quote from: tgirlamc on July 06, 2017, 05:53:25 PM
Hi Marshall and welcome to the forum!!!
Congrats on the brave step forward to show the world and yourself a bit more of what you are about!... It is easy to picture our first ventures out into the world like the end of a Frankenstein movie where we end up being chased by angry villagers with torches and pitchforks but that is only because of human nature... Where there is an unknown about how others may react to something... We tend to insert our deepest fears to some degree!
If you are waiting for the other shoe to drop... It may be a long wait sister.. I have never had a truly negative reaction from anyone... If you are considering pursuing things further, don't let fear of the possibilities of others reactions rule your choices... You sound like you are exploring things and starting to realize much has been buried for a long time that needs to come out a bit more into the light!!!... Enjoy the exploration!!!
Onward we go brave sister
Ashley :)
The encouragement means so much! Thank you!
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Quote from: marshall1958 on July 06, 2017, 11:30:25 AM
Ok first things first.
I don't know what i am anymore.
I'm a man who has loved wearing dresses and skirts as long as i can remember. And i have hid it from everyone except a few close friends.
I am not a passable woman and only wear lipstick and nail polish.
For the past week i have worn nothing but dresses and have gone out in public!
I have recieved no negative actions from others in the area o live. Went to gas stations, wal-mart, even went to Applebees for cocktails with my roommate. She has been extremely supportive.
I have been happier than i can remember ever being.
But i am afraid of when is the other shoe going to drop.
Sent from my SM-J700T1 using Tapatalk
Being passable is a subjective thing...most of us have a hard time accepting ourselves, so to think that some random stranger will accept us as "Just another woman" is too hard for us to wrap our brains around...we have been conditioned to be fearful. How many times have you read about passing not just being about looks but about the way you think about yourself...it is way more than having a pretty face...lots of girls with pretty faces don't pass because they don't think they do.
Hope you can get some peace around this.
Hi, Marshall!
It took me months to realize that almost nobody is out there trying to spot "us". Most other folks on the street are just trying to get to their next appointment or that sale, or get goods for supper, and are having enough difficulty with just walking down the street, not bumping into others, and remembering where they parked their car to pay much attention to details of someone else's appearance.
We don't really get spotted much unless we draw attention to ourselves, whether from inappropriate dress, odd posture (furtive, actively trying not to be seen!), or other anomalies. I spent my first few months out in a gray wig, t-shirt and cardigan, straight-leg jeans, and black sneakers, practically a uniform for 60-something women in this region. Nobody said anything.
I still spend time most days people-watching, studying how to dress and move. It helps!
I hope you feel welcome here.
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