Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: JJ_BLOSSOM on July 29, 2017, 09:21:39 AM

Title: Post-op parenthood
Post by: JJ_BLOSSOM on July 29, 2017, 09:21:39 AM
So I was hoping for some insight from a few of you who have maybe been there done that.. those of you who've had kids before you transitioned, are you in there lives today? Do they accept you? What do they call you now that it's not dad? These are all situations I'm about to be facing so any insight is appreciated
Much luv JJ [emoji254]

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Title: Re: Post-op parenthood
Post by: Thessa on July 29, 2017, 09:37:52 AM
I have two daughters, 20 and 11yrs. old.
Both are still in my life although the older one moved out last year to live with her BF.

My little one is living most of the time with me (75/25) until the divorce settlement changed it to 2/3 of the time with me and the rest with her mother.

She told me shortly after I told her how I feel and when I started HRT that she likes me more than before. But she said also that she also knew/had the feeling that I was more available for her than her mother  in the years before we separate.

As an example it was more important to my EX to play Farmville instead of playing with our daughter. So I stopped working (home office) and took some time to play with her before continuing my work.

It often happend that she called me Mama before I started my transition. So it looks like it was obvious on a subconscious level.

I don't know what the future will look like - puberty is fast approaching - but I hope for the best.

She calls me by my name or Mapa but sometimes it still Papa.
Title: Re: Post-op parenthood
Post by: warlockmaker on July 29, 2017, 10:30:51 AM
I have children, 3 girls ( ages 5 yrs, 15 yrs and 33 yrs old). The support I received from them was overwhelming. For example my 15 yr old who was 14yrs then. I worried about how her peers would react at school. Her school, British International, is the top school in Phuket, Thailand. I told her 6 weeks before my surgery. In a one to one talk I told her. She was immediately supportive and said she figured as much and said that there would be no issue with her peers. She reminded me that this is not the stone age. Plus she added that if they did the school would expel them. She want to keep calling me dad, nothing has changed. But she lives in Thailand and has that wonderful open mind that gives me great hope for this next generation. My 5 yr old calls me dad also, nothing has changed. My oldest daughter, has been nothing short of total support and is so proud of me, she calls me dad and we are closer now than before.
Title: Re: Post-op parenthood
Post by: Dena on July 29, 2017, 11:43:26 AM
No children (unfortunately) here but there is a theme on the site. Before puberty if your children realize that you will continue to love them and you will still be the same person, they don't have a problem with the transition. Once they reach puberty, it depends somewhat how they were raised. Some are extremely accepting and others take the opposite view. Taking the time to explain it carefully helps with older children but not all of them will accept a transition.