Yesterday while at my job I got asked about my hair and how much longer I was growing it. Every so often somebody does ask. I had no easy answer ofcourse since most do not know why I grew it long over the past years. Most there don't know Im trans so any answer is very hard to say.
I guess when I think about it, there are rare times when I miss having it really short for some reason but that thought comes to me hardly ever and I would never give up my long hair up ever! I guess some people miss the short hair maybe. If I did cut it, my dysphoria would come back horribly and the last 2 times I cut it all off, I felt like hell.
Id love to give an answer but I don't know how people would react to the answer and than the answer will bring more questions. I wish it was easier to say or that people just knew me as Larisa. That would be even better duh!!
Like many I was growing my hair out at work before being out, heck I even had my hair transplant (I'm sure my colleagues must have thought I was a very vain guy!).
I had several comments from colleagues about my hair length as it got longer, I never gave an explanation, simply agreed with their observation and moved the conversation on. If they had suspicions, they certainly kept them to themselves.
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I'd say I don't know, that you're just letting it grow. I was never asked about how much I would grow my hair. I've always changed hairstyles drastically. From shoulder length to shaved. Now I want to have it as long as possible, I want to see how it looks, but I miss my shoulder length hair.
I've been growing my hair for over 25 years now & when people ask why I used to say I was in to rock music & they believed me 😊
Sara
Tell them you want to emulate Jesus. 90% of the first members of Congress, getting back to your roots...as a cave dweller. How about this one. None of your business.
I gave a few different answers depending on my mood. Here are the ones I used most often. This always works to forestall further questions.
* I like it!
* I'm maintaining balance in the universe since so many men are bald.
* I'm protesting against the patriarchy.
* I'm a liberal hippie.
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Quote from: DawnOday on August 12, 2017, 04:43:12 PM
Tell them you want to emulate Jesus. 90% of the first members of Congress, getting back to your roots...as a cave dweller. How about this one. None of your business.
Great one Dawn! 😃
I used to have long hair till I was 40 (hippie). I cut it because it was always in my face. At the time I was aware that I wasn't sure about my gender. I had many fantasies of me being a woman. I'm in my 1st month of Spironolactone and estradiol, maybe I should consider growing it back. At the time numerous women commented on they wish they had my hair.
Y'know, I had long hair several times before I even realised I was trans, and it was never a big deal - a guy with long hair is not such a crazy thing in the UK. I guess it depends where in the world you are, but I find it incredible that people anywhere feel the need to make a thing out of a (perceived as) man having long hair...the fact it's even unallowed in some offices. Madness! If anyone asked me why I had long hair (without realising I'm actually a girl), I imagine I'd just say "uuuhhhhh because I haven't cut it for a while". Similarly, "Why are you vegetarian?" - "Because I don't eat meat." =P
Born into a military family it was "short Back and sides" or a crew cut for me. Until the late 70's where I was allowed to have a little length in it. Not to my Fathers liking...but that was many years ago now. Then I never got a chance. So its been nearly 2 years I have been growing it out and have long hair for the first time in my life...
I love it and hate it...I love the way it looks but the time I have to spend looking after it is huge and then there is getting it caught in everything....windy day roll up the window because my hair is blowing everywhere...catch huge wad of hair in window...now stuck with face plastered to the drivers side window frantically scrabbling for the switch again....still not enough for me to cut it...I am sure I will get sick of it... ;) but not yet.
I've had long hair since I grew it out after high school. I never cared what anyone thought about it. These days, I get people asking if it's my real color. No more questions regarding the length.
I'm getting the same question about my hair AND my weight loss. I simply agree with them like "yeah I've lost weight, I'm just naturally skinny" or "yeah I'm letting my hair grow, got bored of short hair" nothing elaborated...I'll just agree and move on, don't make it a big deal and chances are they won't either.
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I never got the how long you ar going to grow it, just the "why" questions.
Some of my answers:
Why not?
Short hair is boring.
Long hair is more fun.
I'm becoming a women. (You need to say it "matter-of-fact".)
My hair isn't longer. My head is shrinking.
Say you are rebelling against the scruffy, yet clean cut metro-sexuals? That real men not only eat quiche but can have long hair. Long hair you can cut if you get tired of it. Tats are forever
Say you don't paid enough to afford hair cuts?
A bet with your mom to see how long it needs to get before dad explodes?
Your wife/gg/SO likes long hair?
Say you are like an ageing Hollywood star or rocker with that long hair and baseball cap look. I can be cool and balding at the same time ???
Need more Mad's Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions?
I used to shave my head daily. Now when asked about my hair I just say I got a free bottle of shampoo and need hair to use it.
Hair? what hair? It is mostly gone now. :'( :'( :'(
Laurie
need to cut my fringe all 5 of them!!!!!
Quote from: JoanneB on August 13, 2017, 12:31:57 PM
Need more Mad's Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions?
My neighbor was shocked one time when he saw me through the door with my hair untied down my back (it's about halfway to my waist. He told me, "Your hair is longer than your wife's!" I answered, "I can't help it if her isn't hair isn't as long as it used to be."
My go-to answer though, especially for bald guys is, "All your hair is on the inside. I keep mine on the outside so I can think more clearly."
Stephanie
Quote from: Steph2.0 on August 15, 2017, 11:35:23 AM
My neighbor was shocked one time when he saw me through the door with my hair untied down my back (it's about halfway to my waist. He told me, "Your hair is longer than your wife's!" I answered, "I can't help it if her isn't hair isn't as long as it used to be."
My go-to answer though, especially for bald guys is, "All your hair is on the inside. I keep mine on the outside so I can think more clearly."
Stephanie
But what do you say when ... your boobs are bigger then your wife's? :o
The hair for me is not an issue, balding since 14. The boobs though....
You could just say "to match my new earrings".
Quote from: JoanneB on August 15, 2017, 08:19:30 PM
But what do you say when ... your boobs are bigger then your wife's? :o
What I'll say is, "WHOOOHOOOO!!!!"
But it's not likely. My wife has a lot more to love nowadays, while I'm 5'5" and in the last year have worked hard to get down to about 140lbs. So I'm not expecting huge breasticles. Not a big deal to me. I'm happily married and intend to stay that way, so all I want is a pleasing shape.
As for the hair, yeah, full and long in the back, bald spot on the crown actually starting to fill in some with minoxidil, and receding in the front. I see grafts in my future...
Stephanie
Well, Larisa, rather than contributing another personal story I'll simply give you advice for you situation based upon decades of wearing long hair. You are at a life crossroads at which you are trying to be two different things at once. This is just the beginning of the difficulties you'll experience. Sooner or later everyone you work with is going to know you are transgender. I'm not sure there's any advantage to waiting until later. Think about that.
As for long hair acceptance, people always react (often negatively) when someone makes a major hairstyle change, but they usually accept it after a time. The very best way to hasten acceptance is to do everything you can to make your hair look as good as possible, whether long or short or masculine or feminine. I've always tried to wear my long hair in well-trimmed, well-styled ways, even if the styling is decidedly feminine. Surprisingly, people tend to be more accepting of this even if you present as male. Go the extra mile and avoid the bad hair days.
Although my personal re-org was quite a few years ago my answer is I can't afford a haircut. I divorced an accountant.
About 30 years ago or more, I started growing my hair out. I didn't know myself at the time why I wanted that. But, when people asked, I told them that I couldn't see the point of spending $10 for the privilege of sitting for an hour in a smoke-filled (this was the 1980s) barber's shop reading Field and Stream magazine while waiting for someone to make my hair conform to the standards of the military-industrial complex. Or spending $20 for the same privilege in a hair stylist's salon, reading People magazine, etc.
I wore it in a ponytail ever since, right up until last year. The longest I could grow it was about shoulder-length.
To me, once you can achieve a pony tail it is pretty easy to be somewhat masculine if you choose. Buns work too. Shorter hair than that can be slicked back with pomade.
I was weekly harassed by the assistant Director of Security at a weekly meeting with hair length questions. When I wore it from behind my ears to over my ears lots of people started questioning. Most were satisfied with I like my hair long. After a Monday meeting the AD of Security caught me in the hallway after the meeting and asked me point blank. How does your boss (EVP) allow you to have long hair (I think then it was just touching my shoulders). I said the President and EVP (I used their names) supported my long hair.
Two weeks later he asked another Senior Director why I was growing my hair long. He called me and let me know. I then called the AD of Security and said I needed his help. I told him I needed to get my ID changed from my present name to my then Preferred name (now legal name). He asked me to stop by his office. I had total support from Security. They gave me some examples of trans family members and others that are trans and that they were 100% supportive. I gave two Security guys a hug that day. Their faces were precious. That Thursday I had my ID name changed and Friday the 13 2015 I came out then expressed full time. I love my long hair.