Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Gender Correction Surgery => Topic started by: Megan. on October 14, 2017, 02:17:19 PM

Title: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: Megan. on October 14, 2017, 02:17:19 PM
I'm separated from my children's mum,  they currently come and stay with me every other w/e, they are 5 and 3, but will be 1 or 2 years older if and when I have any surgery.
I know recovery varies greatly,  but is anyone able to comment on the practicality of looking after 2 children after a vaginoplasty or how soon after it might be possible?
I've still not decided how far down the surgical road I want to go,  but an orchi might be my only practical option for a few years due to my kids.

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Title: Re: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: mm on October 14, 2017, 02:37:08 PM
There will be time after surgery when you will not be able to totally care for them.  Is there someone who can help you during this recovery time.
Title: Re: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: Dena on October 14, 2017, 03:13:55 PM
If they can be left alone for an hour at a time and if you aren't working, it should be doable after a couple of weeks. Your not going to be running around with them and it will be more in door activities. In my case, I returned to work after 2 weeks but I would advise 6-8 weeks if possible before doing that. After two weeks you should be able to care for yourself and have enough free time to care for the kids as needed.

The biggest issue is having uninterrupted time to do the dilation. It would be a real problem if you just inserted the dilator and the kids demanded attention. When you are down to two dilations, you might schedule one early and the other after the kids are in bed then take a nap mid day if you need it.
Title: Re: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: SadieBlake on October 14, 2017, 03:16:15 PM
Yeah I wouldn't count on being able to care for pre-teens much before 6 weeks out unless you have help. Of course it depends on the kids and how you recover.
Title: Re: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: Megan. on October 14, 2017, 03:25:44 PM
Thanks all for your thoughts,  they confirm my own feelings. The time I get to have with my kids is so precious to me, I'm hesitant to give up any; plus it gives their mum a break which she always deserves.

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Title: Re: GRS and parenting young children
Post by: Rachel on October 15, 2017, 08:03:54 AM
I would give it two weeks to watch them and get easy food preparation. At that point you still will need a week to rest as much as possible. This is assuming there are no complication's.

You will need to dilate several times a day. I had to dilate 5 times a day at that point for 30 minutes per dilation.