SO, hi everybody.
I am a trans girl, I think I have presented myself many times already so I won't bother to again. I have recently had BA and SRS in a single procedure to have less expenses and because I thought it was better to go through all the pain all at once.
I feel like I am gpoing crazy. After BA and SRS, I thought I would be satisfied and happy. And I really am. And I feel so grateful I am able to have them done so young, and I'm definitely happy with the results, even if I still look swollen. However, now I find myself nitpicking my looks in other ways. I think this pattern is quite obsessive and maybe not healthy. I just hate so much about my face and hate uploading photos of me to social networks because I always find something wrong in me.
Mainly I feel my nose is way big, bt this really is true. I wish I could have a delicate nose. My eyes are a big plus on my face but with the nose combined with brow bossing, they just aren't as noticeable as they would be. Then I also have a weak chin, and should have used braces to correct an overbite but my parents think i's unnecessary. Maybe they are right? I don't know. If I had the Money, I would undergo FFS in a heartbeat. I just know I would feel so much better with just one or two procedures but can't help my financial situation right now as I am a student and my parents wouldn't pay for it.
Do we trans girls and women, even if 1000000% passable, eventually go through these procedures? Do we all deep down want them? People will think I am vain to want this, because after all I pass all the time, and don't get questioning looks ever. Yet I still want them. https://imgur.com/a/Vm4JU this is me, these pics will disappear in no time
I feel at the bottom of the pit right now. I wish I could relax in to my life but it seems I can't.
I also don't wear makeup, except mascara. I could but at the end of the day makeup is gonna come out and I'm still going to feel bad all the time. I don't mean to sound boastful, but people who know my story tell me all the time how pretty I am, but I don't feel this way at all! I just feel like they are sugarcoating to make themselves and me feel better. OMG. I wish I could stop.
Wow, you're the girl from the pictures? Well, you really are beautifull and 100% passable. You may have a big nose, but your eyes totally make up for it.
Maybe your problem is that you're after a beauty standart that just doesn't fit your kind of beauty. Everyone can be beautiful in their own way. IMO, you have a strong indian aura around you. Thick brows and big noses are considered beautiful in that area. You could check out Bollywood films and novels, where the good looking girls usually have features like yours. You could start identifying with those characters and you may start liking those features that make you look like them. I did something similar to accept my body and face. Not with indian TV though.
It can fail, and if you still don't like your nose and you really feel it's a necesity to have it altered, I believe it's OK to undergo FFS. I'd beg you not to do it, because it will ruin that beautiful and unique face you have, but it's your choice, and yours only.
You're not crazy. Men and women, trans or not, seek plastic surgery to correct things they dislike. Even going to the gym is an exercise of self love and vanity... why do you think there are wall to wall mirrors... it's not to check your form.
You do look quite lovely. And the makeup thing is personal preference. The whole goal or makeup is to make it look like you're not wearing any... So you're golden. And your face won't melt in the sun. Lol
I get where you're coming from. To test your success... go to the market and see if you get hit on. There's your most honest answer.
Quote from: Lady Lisandra on October 14, 2017, 05:13:16 PM
Wow, you're the girl from the pictures? Well, you really are beautifull and 100% passable. You may have a big nose,
It can fail, and if you still don't like your nose and you really feel it's a necesity to have it altered, I believe it's OK to undergo FFS. I'd beg you not to do it, because it will ruin that beautiful and unique face you have, but it's your choice, and yours only.
Thank you,
See, that is the thing. I don't really like being callled exotic. And I am so pale, nobody ever has said to me I could be indian so I am not sure that would help......
I understand that you just want to be a "normal" girl, but different doesn't mean ugly. FFS won't make you look better, it will make you look more normal. If that works for you, then go a head...
You are beautiful just as you are! Surgery is fine if you need it but you surely do not! Most CIS women wish They look as good as you! And your nose isn't too big, I've seen them a lot bigger. Thick brows are in, so don't worry about that. Surgery is great but cant fix what's in your head. Look around at other girls, you look as good or better than almost all of them! Please don't fall into the trap of 'I need to fix this, I need to fix that'. The human Barbie did that, and now she's a giant joke.
You are so sweet I did not saw your picture but I'm sure you are a cute girl
People tell me that I'm a pretty girl ( and inside of me I know that ) but I still want to add on that
I can totally understand you
Recover well ❤️
You're not going crazy.
You've grown up dysphoric, and so you've identified everything that could possibly have led to your misgendering. Which has led to identifying everything, even if it hasn't led to your misgendering.
It's so tricky when it comes to our faces. If the face hasn't changed, it's going to pull up (automatically, subconsciously) all those memories of looking in the mirror and seeing the face of dysphoria. Even when there's no more misgendering going on. What you really need is new memories. New memories of yourself.
And that's going to take time. Time and experience. Well, you've got time -- you'll be healing for months -- and then you'll get out in the world and start having experiences. As long as you practice non-disclosure, you shouldn't have any misgendering incidents. Each day without incident, you can look in the mirror and say, "I put my best face forward today, and I was successful!" Over time, you'll build up a new set of memories, memories which can override the old ones.
If after a couple of years there isn't any difference in your perspective, go ahead and plan for facial surgery. But know this -- it won't be "feminization" because you, Aurorasky, are already female and look the part. Rather, it'll be something like "FRS" -- Facial Reidentification Surgery. Changing the picture for the sake of changing the picture, to interrupt an unfortunately negative feedback loop deep in your brain.
Some of us need to do everything, and it's not a good thing or a bad thing, it's just an expensive thing.