This is pure curiosity and not based on anything but an arbitrary thought, but I was wondering, how common is it for a transwoman and transman to date each other, particularly during one or both's transition?
I've seen only a token number of references to this scenario, which seems odd to me given that another trans person would be a perfect case of someone who would be understanding and compassionate during transition. And while I see the downsides as well (being "that trans couple", potential instability long term as both people are still coming to grips with themselves, etc.), even if it is just seeking companionship during transition it seems as though it should be a more common thing. (And maybe it is and just not talked about, as this is an assumption based on my own exposure to people discussing relationships.)
I've no idea how common this is but there is a beautiful book about a couple cross transitioning. https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/3791382489/ I heard them talk when the book was released. They are no longer a couple but are still friends. I got the feeling they separated for reasons unrelated to gender. Zackary Drucker now is connected to Transparent.
Claire -
I know one couple in my area that are FTM (non-binary) and MTF. It is probably not uncommon.
Again I am voicing what everyone else has said "I don't know how prevalent it is but, it happens." I know a few that I follow on social media that they are transgenders being trans themselves. I think it fits together well I mean as a couple you share the bond of having very similar lives and issues. Conceptually for me it seems like it would be easier you don't have to explain you're trans and what that means. Cool thought!!!!!
Hmm I don't really know. A lot of the transguys on you tube date each other. Even though it seems totally logical for trans people to date each other, because someone is trans that doesn't mean they would be open to dating another trans person. It would depend on the individuals themselves. I imagine there are trans people who are only attracted to cis partners. And I wouldn't judge them for it if they do. Would I date a transguy if I was single? If I was attracted to him, absolutely. I've seen some very cute transguys on YouTube and here at Susan's. Personally I wouldn't care what he had between his legs if he was a nice guy and I was attracted to him. But I'm sure not all transpeople feel that way. People can't help what they are and aren't attracted to.
I suppose it's like all those famous actors dating you hear about. They probably don't think "hey, we're both actors, let's get together". They work and interract together, which can lead to being eventually seduced by one another. Going to support groups, joining communities etc probably has the same effect for trans people.
I don't know how common it is but for the past several months I have been thinking if I would date a trans person myself and I would.
I don't have a clue how common it is, but when I married my spouse I didn't yet know I was nonbinary transmasc (I finally figured it out early this year), and my spouse (who knew since childhood) didn't come out to me as MtF until ten years after our marriage, 19 years ago. We were both trans and didn't know it!
At one time, I knew a trans guy that was my age, and we were friends. He made it clear he was only into cis women, and I accepted that.
I think you might find trans woman + trans woman relationships to be far more prevalent. I've been scorned by a great many trans women after I turned down their advances.