It seems like yesterday, it seems like forever. I can barely imagine who I used to be, and my decision to change was the best decision I have ever taken.
Even at ten years, there's barely a day goes by that I don't marvel at my life now, at the rightness of who I am. But even at ten years, there's still much to learn, to do, to develop to become a whole person again. My change was entire, I grieved the life lost as I welcomed the life gained.
The deep and dangerously suicidal depressions have gone, the whirlwind depressions which followed have diminished almost to obscurity. The self confidence rides strong one day, weaker the next. It's a roller-coaster ride, always has been. But fantastic.
Hi and welcome to the forum [emoji4].
Thank you for sharing your experience, it's nice to hear another voice from the other side of transition.
I'm a 40 y/o mtf trans-woman from the UK. I'm pre-op (maybe late next year?).
There's a great bunch of people here, I'm sure many would appreciate your experience, and there are others here who could share theirs with you.
Megan. X
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Quote from: AutumnGlory on November 25, 2017, 10:13:17 AM
It seems like yesterday, it seems like forever. I can barely imagine who I used to be, and my decision to change was the best decision I have ever taken.
Even at ten years, there's barely a day goes by that I don't marvel at my life now, at the rightness of who I am. But even at ten years, there's still much to learn, to do, to develop to become a whole person again. My change was entire, I grieved the life lost as I welcomed the life gained.
The deep and dangerously suicidal depressions have gone, the whirlwind depressions which followed have diminished almost to obscurity. The self confidence rides strong one day, weaker the next. It's a roller-coaster ride, always has been. But fantastic.
Thanks AutumnGlory!!!
You are beautifully expressing the glory of transformation, liberation and the true value found along the path to an authentic life finally your own...
For no particular reason... My favorite passage by Walt Whitman that embraces some of the same themes....
From this hour I ordain myself loos'd of limits and imaginary lines,
Going where I list, my own master total and absolute,
Listening to others, considering well what they say,
Pausing, searching, receiving, contemplating,
Gently,but with undeniable will, divesting myself of the holds that would hold me.
I inhale great draughts of space,
The east and the west are mine, and the north and the south are mine.
I am larger, better than I thought,
I did not know I held so much goodness.
All seems beautiful to me,
I can repeat over to men and women You have done such good to me I would do the same to you,
I will recruit for myself and you as I go,
I will scatter myself among men and women as I go,
I will toss a new gladness and roughness among them,
Whoever denies me it shall not trouble me,
Whoever accepts me he or she shall be blessed and shall bless me.
Onward we go...
Ashley 😀
Hi Autumn :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that we offer to all new members to help them along
Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) |
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html) | Cautionary Note (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,82221.0.html) | Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866) |
Hugs
V M
It's been nearly half a century for me and yes life is fabulous. Has been, ever since.