When I was a kid I was constantly teased that I was a girl through many different schools and city's it followed me. If I only knew or accepted it back then. (right?) Did any of y'all go through this?
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Yes, 100 times yes. I regret not accepting it too.
Quote from: Zquence on December 25, 2017, 03:19:05 AM
When I was a kid I was constantly teased that I was a girl through many different schools and city's it followed me. If I only knew or accepted it back then. (right?) Did any of y'all go through this?
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Oh, yes. Until I learned to put on the "boy suit" and never ever take it off, I was the sissy in the neighborhood. And since we never moved there was never a chance to start fresh. It took a very long time to shed that sissy image. That suit was glued on so tight that it took me 50 years to realize that I could take it off and finally be me.
While there are some on here who had the strength to address it, we're talking about getting through the 60s, 70s, 80s, etc. without being ostracized or much worse. I accepted who I was, but didn't dare do anything about it.
So here I am, nearly 60 years old, finally finding my joy. Yes, the past was bad, but there's still a lot of living to be done. It's best not to dwell on sad could-have-been's, and focus on the happy will-be's.
Stephanie
Yes I went through this too. So bad that I completely changed my personality to try to hide it completely. By the time I hit high school people stopped bullying me cause I was considered that quiet mysterious guy. It stuck with me until I hit 30. Bullying hurts so many people in so many different ways. But I think cause of it, I'm become a very strong person. Now someone tries to pick on me, I know how to stop it or make them feel awkward. And I rush to help anyone that gets teased now.
Quote from: Steph2.0 on December 25, 2017, 06:54:05 AM
Oh, yes. Until I learned to put on the "boy suit" and never ever take it off, I was the sissy in the neighborhood.
Yup, I was the same. I learned early about the boy suit. If I didn't wear it parents wouldn't let their kids play with me, so I had it on always. We are older Steph, but we have much to live still!
Bari Jo
Yes, it was the worst in earlier years in elementary school on the bus rides to an from school. I was teased and taunted ruthlessly by a few 8th grade kids, one rather nasty girl in particular. As unpleasant as it was, it ceased once the small group of nasty kids moved on to high school, which put them on a different bus.
I was very well accepted by my peers, never had a problem with classmates. I was generally liked and got along with everyone, had many good friends, and had good friends in my neighborhood as well. By the time I got to middle school, the curriculum was tracked into 8 different academic levels. I ended up in the top academic group which provided separation from the dolts who were prone to teasing and other bad behaviors. From this point onward, I was with quite open minded bright kids and had no problems at all.
Quote from: Zquence on December 25, 2017, 03:19:05 AM
When I was a kid I was constantly teased that I was a girl through many different schools and city's it followed me. If I only knew or accepted it back then. (right?) Did any of y'all go through this?
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No, not specifically that. Sadly I had a somewhat more irksome issue. I was "too" smart. People in my peer group didn't like that. At all. They felt threatened. That probably overshadowed a lot of stuff and I'm not sure whether to be thankful for that or not. I was called too sensitive at times, but I've been called that my whole life so... nothing new there.
Sure... All the time. I sometimes wished that I would have figured it out for myself, but other times... I realize I wouldn't have had the same experiences or made the same friends as I did. The decision to transition comes in its own time. Never before you're ready for it.
A lot of times. I wore the boy suit not very convincingly I later found out. After years of bullying by the time I was 13 I learned self defence & fought back. I later found out my nickname at school was Emily but no one dared call me that!
I don't even remember when I specifically had to put on the mask - everyone was mean at my first school but I some how avoided trouble. I was never impressed by the power games boys would play to prove they were something. Whenever some one tried to bully me I just stared them down and offered to break them. I was never concerned for my own safety. And I think that came across that they could not hurt me with words or actions.
Kind of sad that I've had that mentality for longer than I can remember I feel like I never had a chance to feel safe and be a kid.
Teased isn't even the word for it. More like terrorized. In elementary school I was teased and made fun of for being albino. In middle school it was being albino and being feminine. In high school it was all about how feminine I was and my androgynous look. In high school the names changed from sissy and gay to ->-bleeped-<-ot, homo, ass bandit, fudge packer, etc. I was never actually beaten up but I was tripped, my books were knocked out of my arms, my lunch was spit on , I had milk thrown in my face, I got hit with water balloons and kids would stomp on the ketchup packets so the ketchup would splatter me. Several times I had someone come up behind me and jerk my pants down. Once I had someone throw blue food coloring in my face and when I was 12 I had some boys spray sealant in my hair which dried rock hard. My dad tried to get it out but he ended up having to cut it out which left a huge bald spot so he ended up having to buzz my hair pretty much like an army cut.
I really wish I could have pretended I was a boy. It would have made my life so much easier. But I never could. But I never dropped out and I graduated. It was really hard to stay in school with so much bullying but I wasn't going to let those people make me quit school. There were a couple of girls in high school who were mean to me but 98% of the people who bullied me were boys. Quite a few of them used female pronouns with me. It was meant as an insult but when they realized it didn't bother me the slightest bit they used that as something else they could tease me about.
If my dad had had any idea how bad school was for me I'm sure he would switched me to home schooling. But I was embarrassed to tell him about it and I downplayed anything the people at school did to me.
Sure, we all got teased.
But no more than the kids with crooked teeth, red hair, dimples, or any of a thousand other unique characteristics. Once the boys discovered that they could "Practice" feeling me up before they attempted to pet their girlfriends, I became very popular!
My safe suit was just a display of confidence in myself.
I think children will attack anyone different. Maybe no one today and not from an area like the one I grew up in would understand but the meanness that I got in school was from not having parents. In all honesty though, I got it from my family much worse than at school. I never had one friend in grade school and I don't know what the cause was, no one would talk to me. I did start school a year early and my birthday is in November so I was three when I started kindergarten, it could have been that. We were poor and despite my family's pride could only afford the rattiest clothes, it might have been that. I do know that no one picked on me at all because everyone was terrified of my brother.
That didn't help with family though. My brother was a terror to anyone outside of my family because family where I grew up was everything but at home that solidarity was gone and I was fair game. Not to say that he was mean but he never tried to stop anyone else in my family from being mean. I don't remember much thankfully but until I learned to shut it in it was bad. Well, not like Julia went through, those people are horrible. I got beat on a lot though and called sissy, Michelle and girl. I can only remember one time at school when people were like that to me. Somehow everyone knew I was in the mental hospital and why. I don't know how, my brother didn't know at first but it didn't take long before everyone knew. That first couple of months were so bad. Not worth talking about now I guess. Actually failed gym that semester because I couldn't go into the locker room at all. Anyway, I eventually fought back and my brother came to my rescue again so like I said, didn't last long. Though I was taken from my family and put into foster care right around that time too, different county so who knows. By that time I was just hate. Hated the world, hated my family, hated myself most of all. People were afraid of me and I didn't care, I just wanted it to end.
It's so sad what has happened to us and others like us. Humans hate different so much and it doesn't look like that will end any time soon.
Hug for everyone here. Take care.