Hi every one I realized I never did an introduction. Well My name is Natalie I am 34 will be 35 this May 2018. I am Male to female Transgender. I was in denial most of my life I new how I felt I always want to transition but never new how or thought I could or could afford it. I knew I was female when I was younger when I did feminine thing I got beat by my father. I have had many girlfriends in my life and I was so jealous of each one individually they all had differant body parts that I love and that I wanted to have. I have realized that I was a Male chauvinistic pig I was trying my hardest to be a male or the idea of male that my Father taught me. I failed at being male no matter what I did I ended up hurting everyone around me and myself I hated myself. I wanted to take my life I did not want to hurt anyone or myself anymore My best friend told me to go see the doctor so I did and I ended up finding out I was intersex I was happy and confused as in why is this just coming out than I found out my parents new when I was 5 years old and I was give shots that I remember. My mom passed away when I was 8 years old and my dad treated me like crap after that. I moved out when I was 16 and moved in with a 32 year old girlfriend. I have had several relationships since than and never worked out not do to them it was mainly my fault as I was a horrible boyfriend as I was a horrible male I tried so hard to be male I over did it I did not know when to stop so people could not suspect I was female. And well I am here I work full time as a Personal Support Worker in a nursing home I am President of a Union local and Certified worker health and Safety rep. I Love my job not all the time but most my employer has been decent about my transition I have not changed my name legally yet do to work licences and financial legalities but I hope by may it will be done I am sorry for this being late and all over the place. If you would like to know anything about me feel free to ask :) thank you
Hi Natalie ;D Better late than never
Hugs
Hi Natalie and welcome to Susan's.
:)
Hi natalie,
I'm Laurie, Won't you come on in? oh wait you are in. Well then would you like to sit down? Or you are sitting. Heck you've just come right in and made yourself at home didn't you? Sheesh where was security when we needed them? Oh heck just go about your business and stay out of trouble y'hear? I see that you are new here. So please let me say, Welcome To Susan's Place! Come on in and take a good look around. I'll add some links and information below that can help you get more out of our site. Please take time to become familiar with them especially the RED one as we are always getting questions that are answered there.
Laurie
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Quote from: natalie.ashlyne on February 16, 2018, 09:33:07 PM
Hi every one I realized I never did an introduction. Well My name is Natalie I am 34 will be 35 this May 2018. I am Male to female Transgender. I was in denial most of my life I new how I felt I always want to transition but never new how or thought I could or could afford it. I knew I was female when I was younger when I did feminine thing I got beat by my father. I have had many girlfriends in my life and I was so jealous of each one individually they all had differant body parts that I love and that I wanted to have. I have realized that I was a Male chauvinistic pig I was trying my hardest to be a male or the idea of male that my Father taught me. I failed at being male no matter what I did I ended up hurting everyone around me and myself I hated myself. I wanted to take my life I did not want to hurt anyone or myself anymore My best friend told me to go see the doctor so I did and I ended up finding out I was intersex I was happy and confused as in why is this just coming out than I found out my parents new when I was 5 years old and I was give shots that I remember. My mom passed away when I was 8 years old and my dad treated me like crap after that. I moved out when I was 16 and moved in with a 32 year old girlfriend. I have had several relationships since than and never worked out not do to them it was mainly my fault as I was a horrible boyfriend as I was a horrible male I tried so hard to be male I over did it I did not know when to stop so people could not suspect I was female. And well I am here I work full time as a Personal Support Worker in a nursing home I am President of a Union local and Certified worker health and Safety rep. I Love my job not all the time but most my employer has been decent about my transition I have not changed my name legally yet do to work licences and financial legalities but I hope by may it will be done I am sorry for this being late and all over the place. If you would like to know anything about me feel free to ask :) thank you
Hi Natalie! I can relate to several things you said. I tried to be overly masculine, & felt that I had to prove I was a man... even went so far as to marry a woman... I knew the marriage was over when the only way I could maintain an erection & reach orgasm was to close my eyes & imagine I was her. The envy of my previous partners genitalia is another way I relate to you. I can not wait to have GRS! I can't i.agine how wonderful it will feel to be able to look down at myself & just feel... RIGHT! *sigh* 7 more months until my endo will sign off...
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I think being overly masculine is a common thing among a lot of transwomen. I think that type of behavior is pretty much a dead giveaway. People might not know what the person is trying to hide but they can usually tell something's up with them. I've suspected one of my brother's friends might be trans or maybe gay. He is a huge ->-bleeped-<-, a total pig towards women and always has to outmasculine every other guy he's around. I know some of that behavior is common among young males and I know about male posturing. But this guy is so totally over the top that something's up. I'm not the only one who notices it either. Tyler has actually thought something was up with him too. He once asked me if the guy did come out as trans if I would try to help him with it. I really dislike this guy, he's a complete tool. But if he did come out as trans yes I would still help him. As much as I don't like him I can see that his extreme behavior is a desperation to hide SOMETHING.