I am gathering that most FTM seem to start out as (from the outside) lesbians. Is that correct?
I live with a male partner and intend to stay with him. I am bi so I am also sexually attracted to women.
However, especially since coming out as trans, somehow his male body makes is more attractive to me. Actually, ANY other body makes more sense to me now. My partner called my description of that an "in-body experience" (the opposite of an out-of-body experience) that happens now. I find his body hot AND it does not make me less masculine so I can enjoy it more.
If I am not making sense, just let me know. FYI, I have not started T yet but will. So that'll change this up as well.... I hear?
I'm NOT lesbian by any stretch of the imagination. I found men attractive before I came out as trans, and I am STILL only into men.
When I became involved with my (also FtM but currently not transitioning) partner, it took me a bit to be able to see past the female body he was born with. Now that I am able to do so, when we have sex, its two gay men going at it, not a transman and female having sex.
So, even though he currently has no plans to transition, he's male, and I treat him as such, both in and out of the bedroom.
Ryuichi
I'm in the "it's raining men!" camp.
One of the reasons I questioned my identity so late is that I am AFAB, but was always completely into men. >:-)
I wonder if my orientation would pan out somewhat after transitioning? I am absolutely squicked at the thought of any vagina-related sexual activity... on others, or on myself. I wonder how much of that stems from my own dysphoria.
Me. I am attracted to everyone. I also have an extremely supportive cis-male husband.
I've noticed recently alot of trans guys are dating guys.
I honestly didn't think it was so common.
I only date female identifying people, but I know a lot of guys who date guys.
I feel like it's like dating one of the bros. Especially when it's two trans guys.
Quote from: blackcat on April 21, 2018, 08:14:38 PM
I'm in the "it's raining men!" camp.
One of the reasons I questioned my identity so late is that I am AFAB, but was always completely into men. >:-)
I wonder if my orientation would pan out somewhat after transitioning? I am absolutely squicked at the thought of any vagina-related sexual activity... on others, or on myself. I wonder how much of that stems from my own dysphoria.
I find women sexy so no dysphoria there.
I am aware that some people separate out sexual attraction and romantic attraction. I think I am bi both ways but to different proportions. I find women sexier but men much more fun to hang out with.
Quote from: Ryuichi13 on April 21, 2018, 07:51:05 PM
I'm NOT lesbian by any stretch of the imagination. I found men attractive before I came out as trans, and I am STILL only into men.
When I became involved with my (also FtM but currently not transitioning) partner, it took me a bit to be able to see past the female body he was born with. Now that I am able to do so, when we have sex, its two gay men going at it, not a transman and female having sex.
So, even though he currently has no plans to transition, he's male, and I treat him as such, both in and out of the bedroom.
Ryuichi
Awesome!
I couldn't stand the idea of being called a lesbian and I didn't consider myself one for a second. Technically bisexual but never been much interested in relationships with women.
T did not change any of that for me.
I'm exclusively sexually attracted to male bodies, and exclusively romantically attracted to men. I could probably take a fellow trans man to bed, but the chemistry would have to be right. But I haven't exactly tried dating or sleeping with anyone but cis men yet, so take this with a little grain of salt. Things may change later.
My sexuality leans heavily toward BDSM, though, so I could probably play the sadist for anyone, whether I found their body sexually appealing or not. The important part is that we had the same idea of what a good time was. However, I don't think anybody would want to have sex with somebody who didn't find them physically attractive in the normal sense (kink complicates this though), and I'm sure there are few women who would feel good about banging a guy who thought her genitals were gross.
I am bisexual. Married to a cis man. Been a couple for 20 years.
I see myself as bisexual but leaning more to gay. Girls are beautiful. But it needs to be a very special girl to make my heart tic faster.
But just a picture of two guys kissing can give me that euphoric feeling of joy and love. Maybe because I identify myself in the picture.
I never was a lesbian. People who don't know me put me in that box though.
Pierre
I'm a trans man who's only attracted to men. Was never in the lesbian world before my transition. I was mostly in the straight world, but even as a girl I mostly ended up with bi guys. I did think I might maybe have a mild attraction to women during my teens and early 20's and thus called myself bisexual, but still only dated men, and a couple of years ago those feelings disappeared and I find myself being turned off by women and female secondary sex characterstics now. I can't imagine being in a relationship with a woman, but might want to try having sex with one just out of curiosity and/or for fun, if she'd be fine with that then of course. Cause I can enjoy sex with people I feel no attraction towards, if I'm just horny and stimulated enough...
I do sometimes get attracted to other trans men, but only if they're at least somewhat into transition. Like they don't have to pass 100% but yeah, at least some maleness to their bodies.
I don't think my change in sexuality was because of T, cause I had already been on it for several years when I noticed that shift. However, I did go through a very stressful life event at that time which changed a lot of my personality traits and how see myself in general also in terms of my gender, expression and sexuality. So I think that's the reason I went from being bi to gay.
I too have felt a stronger attraction to male bodies since I started transitioning, however for me it's more like I've been... uh, kind of idolising maleness. Both in terms of wanting to have a male body myself and in terms of being sexually attracted to maleness in others, as in almost worshipping their bodies. But I try to not be creepy about it. I kinda see it as a "two way attraction" for me, that goes both inwards and outwards.
Quote from: SeptagonScars on April 24, 2018, 12:02:47 PM
I too have felt a stronger attraction to male bodies since I started transitioning, however for me it's more like I've been... uh, kind of idolising maleness. Both in terms of wanting to have a male body myself and in terms of being sexually attracted to maleness in others, as in almost worshipping their bodies. But I try to not be creepy about it. I kinda see it as a "two way attraction" for me, that goes both inwards and outwards.
That's interesting. I can see myself going there.
Quote from: blackcat on April 21, 2018, 08:14:38 PM
I'm in the "it's raining men!" camp.
One of the reasons I questioned my identity so late is that I am AFAB, but was always completely into men. >:-)
I wonder if my orientation would pan out somewhat after transitioning? I am absolutely squicked at the thought of any vagina-related sexual activity... on others, or on myself. I wonder how much of that stems from my own dysphoria.
I'm pretty much in the same boat.
I think I am bisexual although I think I like girls more nowadays. I dedinitely like some men but honestly I don't even understand myself anymore. Usually when I look at men I just don't find them attractive but there are rare occasions when I like somebody a lot.
Before I transitioned I couldn't date girls. I couldn't let myself to be labeled as "a lesbian". Something about that felt too wrong. That made it impossible. I just dated feminine men.
Quote from: Teddy79 on April 21, 2018, 07:45:13 PM
I am gathering that most FTM seem to start out as (from the outside) lesbians. Is that correct?
Nope! That's a common misconception.
I am gay and I have NEVER found women remotely attractive in any way. I have always been attracted to men. Pre-testosterone as well as on testosterone!
Testosterone itself does not change one's sexual orientation and it won't turn a bloke who had been straight before gay as some people seriously claim.
If a transman's sexual orientation changes on testosterone that has often to do with him feeling more comfortable with himself and being able to accept attraction that he had previously suppressed in one way or the other.
I've always been pansexual, and I'm married to an incredibly supportive man [emoji173]️
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Interesting thread! My sexuality has always been a bit ambiguous for me. As a teenager I felt off somehow and decided I must be lesbian since I didn't feel or see myself with boys, somehow. But that didn't sit well either in the end. Most of my life I identified as bisexual. Nowadays I'm not so sure. It sounds a bit weird but it's more like I've always wanted to be in a relationship with a man... but kind of as a gay man... but before the notion of FtM had crossed my mind, that obviously made no sense to me. All I knew was that I wasn't straight. I'd watch films with gay male characters and think "I wish I could be that" (whilst simultaneously castigated myself for thinking it because it seemed that gay men had an even harder time in society than gay women) All very complicated!
Now that I'm in a more questioning phase about my gender, I really don't know. I'm working on the premise that I will deal with one thing at a time. Get my gender expression right, and then see what sexuality then develops naturally out of that.
Meh, My 2 cents there!
I talked to my (FTM) gender therapist yesterday, and he said that wasn't all that unusual - finding men even more attractive as transitioning more towards male yourself. That's wild. I certainly experience being more attracted to my (cis male) partner as I am thinking of myself as male.
If I turn out to be gay trans male - it would not surprise me that it took me 38 years to figure that out! Quite a riddle if you grow up without hearing about any LBGTQ options.
Quote from: Allsorts on May 01, 2018, 07:11:41 AM
Interesting thread! My sexuality has always been a bit ambiguous for me. As a teenager I felt off somehow and decided I must be lesbian since I didn't feel or see myself with boys, somehow. But that didn't sit well either in the end. Most of my life I identified as bisexual. Nowadays I'm not so sure. It sounds a bit weird but it's more like I've always wanted to be in a relationship with a man... but kind of as a gay man... but before the notion of FtM had crossed my mind, that obviously made no sense to me. All I knew was that I wasn't straight. I'd watch films with gay male characters and think "I wish I could be that" (whilst simultaneously castigated myself for thinking it because it seemed that gay men had an even harder time in society than gay women) All very complicated!
Now that I'm in a more questioning phase about my gender, I really don't know. I'm working on the premise that I will deal with one thing at a time. Get my gender expression right, and then see what sexuality then develops naturally out of that.
Meh, My 2 cents there!
Quote from: Teddy79 on May 04, 2018, 01:38:26 PMIf I turn out to be gay trans male - it would not surprise me that it took me 38 years to figure that out! Quite a riddle if you grow up without hearing about any LBGTQ options.
IKR? It took me by complete and total surprise when I realized I've been gay all this time! :o
But I also thought I was the only one that felt like they were "born in the wrong gendered body" for most of my life.
It was more of a shock realizing I'm gay than being trans is. I always KNEW I was trans.
Ryuichi
It's kind of an absurd "culture shock" as well... to go from liking cis men to liking cis men, but everyone treats you very much differently for it when you are in the "gay man" box. The reality of being with a man don't change much though.
I think for me, the shock is more "WHY I've always wanted to top cis men," even when I preferred PIV sex (which since going on T I no longer do). My preferrence of always liking men has never changed, just my preference of HOW I prefer to think of myself, if that makes any sense.
I suppose you can say that before T, I often wanted to be on top during PIV sex, and now, my urge is to be the one doing the penetrating, even if my current "equipment" isn't enough to penetrate with.
Its frustrating, really.
Ryuichi
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Quote from: Ryuichi13 on May 04, 2018, 02:07:51 PM
IKR? It took me by complete and total surprise when I realized I've been gay all this time! :o
But I also thought I was the only one that felt like they were "born in the wrong gendered body" for most of my life.
It was more of a shock realizing I'm gay than being trans is. I always KNEW I was trans.
Ryuichi
I'll say something non pc. I don't enjoy being around women. I find them sexy, yes, but I don't enjoy their company too much. Of course there are exceptions, but I just feel more at ease, both romantically and sexually and socially, with men. Which explains wonderfully why I feel like I am in the wrong movie given that I have an over average number of kids - and they are all girls. So every school event, I have to hang out with women. I hear about every girl drama. It's draining for me.
Meeeeee!
But my sexuality is a mess, because for every 100 guys I'm attracted to, a woman manages to slide her way in. I've even written about my bizarre experiences with women, they're always messy and every time I end it... I'm like nope, not again! But I keep flip flopping between queer and gay my whole life.
I like men and women, probably those in between as well. However, I have a hard time with cis men. Lots of issues there, even outside of dysphoria. My sexuality labels changed a lot growing up. It's fine now, but I still have issues with cis men.
I don't really equate bodies with gender, though. Not hard for me. I know it's a lot deeper for other guys, though.
Yeah, I dated women before my transition but was always secretly bi/pan. The lesbians I hung out with saw bi/pan women as 'traitors' and 'not real lesbians'. Mind you, I technically wasn't a 'real lesbian' either since I was really a man.
It's weird [and TMI, perhaps], but before my transition penetrative sex was very uncomfortable. Even oral didn't really feel good. I couldn't relax and enjoy myself. It was too awkward. I was worried about this when I met a cisguy a few weeks after my chest surgery. We got down to giggity and I waited for that little bit of pain and awkwardness. Never came. It was like the clouds parted and a shower of rainbow light fell upon us as the gods said "About damn time, Buddy Boy!"
Over the next couple years as I became more and more comfortable with myself, sex got better and better. Now I primarily date men but would probably go out with a woman if we had a good connection. So, I guess I'm a gay boy after all. [Now if I could just let myself enjoy musicals...]
Thanks, that was interesting to read. Don't mind the TMI ;)
Quote from: Amadeus on May 07, 2018, 04:11:50 PM
Yeah, I dated women before my transition but was always secretly bi/pan. The lesbians I hung out with saw bi/pan women as 'traitors' and 'not real lesbians'. Mind you, I technically wasn't a 'real lesbian' either since I was really a man.
It's weird [and TMI, perhaps], but before my transition penetrative sex was very uncomfortable. Even oral didn't really feel good. I couldn't relax and enjoy myself. It was too awkward. I was worried about this when I met a cisguy a few weeks after my chest surgery. We got down to giggity and I waited for that little bit of pain and awkwardness. Never came. It was like the clouds parted and a shower of rainbow light fell upon us as the gods said "About damn time, Buddy Boy!"
Over the next couple years as I became more and more comfortable with myself, sex got better and better. Now I primarily date men but would probably go out with a woman if we had a good connection. So, I guess I'm a gay boy after all. [Now if I could just let myself enjoy musicals...]
I have always been attracted to men. There were only two girls I ever had crushes on when I was a teenager and both of them were butch lesbians. I've taken that to mean I'm attracted to masculinity and masculine presentation. My current boyfriend is a trans man and we've been together for several years. I've never had a problem with his body and have always been sexually attracted to him the same way I'm attracted to the bodies of cis men.
as a female to male i find women attractive but i guess i find trans men who look female attractive to but not a full male. i have a girlfriend now who thought i was born male but after falling in love and having so much in comany with our familes, i finally told her(which as you'd expect was a shock) but after time to think and accepting me we now have a child together. our 6 month old boy. im his legal daddy.
but back to the question,no i find women attractive.