Hello everyone, My name is Eliz, I am new here, so it looks like this is the only website that can help me with my problems.
Last 2-3 years I think intensive about transition from male to female, but I am just not sure if its right way for me, you know from my childhood I was very emotional and sensitive kid I cry literary everytime big problem was that I was a boy and according to everyone in my country, boy could not cry, I also wasn't sure about my orientation, for a long time i imagined to kissing with a boy, few years after that I love one girl so i thought everything is alright with my orientation after all, in my puberty i don t have very boyish interest (except computer games) .... I was really into art and history.....everything changed 4 years ago that i saw a first time transgender woman on internet I was fascinated by what hormones can do i thought about it that i would change my gender(now I am going, to be honest with you) shortly after,that made me Sexual arousal(YOP I AM WEIRD)
it just become sexual fantasy, that i masturbated a lot for a few years(btw i masturbate 2-3 times day) I am basically addicted so every time i have dysphoria i masturbate and don't do anything about it,So I started to think Am I even a transgender or ->-bleeped-<- or whatever... this week i started to feel lonely and dysphoric so i tried to interrupted my bad habit(i don t even withstand without masturbation 1 day) i know also that hrt will decrease libido and sex drive but will it destroy my problem? i am just not sure about it anymore look like part of my want to transition because i my life would be better as a woman,and part of me is this weird pervert guy with weird fetish so main question: AM i trans,or not? shout i wait to see a doctor about my transition(btw i am 19 so best age to hrt..) I will be glad to answer my questions, what is your opinion about it... Thank you if you read this entire long text
Hi Eliz 🙋♀️ Welcome to Susan's Place! I'm Jessica.
A good place to start is seeking out a gender therapist. They can help you sort out how you identify.
Your libido does decrease on hrt, and with myself the intense pressure of needing it decreased. Hrt affects everyone uniquely and what happens to one may not happen the same with another.
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Welcome to Susan's Place. Being transgender is something only you can diagnose. A doctor can confirm your diagnosis but your the only one who really knows what your feeling. If you are transgender, the only sure thing is it isn't going away with out treatment. As Jessica stated, it would be a good idea to see a gender therapist however there are a few things you can look at while you working on that. The first is our WIKI (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Transgender) where you will learn more about what it is to be transgender. The second link is "the transition channel" (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfO3B57E6NpIn-KsVjvmLLw) where you will be able to explore your feelings. Should you have questions, feel free to ask them and somebody will likely be able to provide an answer.
Welcome to the forum, definitely recommend speaking with a gender therapists. That is something all of us on HRT have done. It really takes some soul searching, but what you're feeling isn't weird as many of us have been there. Also know that being aroused by transgenders May or may not mean you should go that route. When you are on HRT, it will usually change your sex drive. Highly recommend talking to more people in the forum and finding a gender therapist in your area!
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