Had my first session with a gender therapist yesterday. While it's too early to say for sure, the first session went pretty well I think. She seems smart and nice and accepting, and I was sorry to have the time run out. She's been working with trans clients for a number of years and has people in my age range. Seems promising. Pretty nice to back the truck up and start dumping stuff out. It is scary though, because I am scared of what is inside me. I am not entirely sure what is going to come tumbling out. I guess at some point I need to talk about coming in femme mode, such as I can achieve. And that seems really scary. Maybe that's dumb, given the context of the therapy, but it does make me nervous.
Big hug! That's a huge step, I think you're going to find that momentum is your friend from here on in. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Yay! Well done on taking that first step into therapy! I know it can be nerve wracking and strange at first. But you've got over the first hurdle :-)
Glad to hear it went well so far and you had a positive first experience. Things are different with different therapists and it does evolve, but a very good sign that there weren't any immediate red flags or problems.
I think it's perfectly normal to feel anxious about what you might find out about yourself in therapy. I'd say to keep reminding yourself that whatever does tumble out, it's part of a process that is meant to help you feel more content and manageable in your life and in yourself. Whatever you discover, is already there anyway. Hopefully this will help you navigate it. It's great that she already has experience of working with trans people/issues.
Wishing you well as you progress :-)
Hi randim,
I am Laurie, the wandering waif of Susan's Place. Congrats on just going to that first meeting. I remember how anxious I was with my own first meeting. It gets easier the more you are able to open up to your therapist. Tell them how you are feeling about the process get to know her and how she is. Let her guide you a little if that helps. The more you can build a trust with her the more open you will be and the better she will be able to help you. I've learned I can tell mine anything. I even told mine I was mad at him and that I considered skipping my appointment because I was still angry 2 weeks later. He thanked me and said it helped him know me better. He is also who I could tell I was feeling so bad that I was thinking of doing myself in. That time was a hard time an I am now on an antidepressant. I came close... Now I have other things I talk to him about.
What I am saying is hang in there and let your therapist know what your issues are so she can help you.
Hugs,
Laurie.