Ok, so next month I get to talk with the LGBT coordinator for the Region at the VA, so happy. I have been trying to talk to them for years, but the cat gets my tongue.
What can I expect for my first visit?
Will they grill me to death?
What are some common mistakes that an individual such as me MtF would encounter when talking to the shrink?
Apologize for the wave of questions right off the bat.
Welcome to Susan's Place! Thank you for your service.
Lying to the therapist would be a big mistake that you should avoid. VA directive 2013-003 spells out their internal guidelines for the treatment of transgender people. By all accounts the VA is very accommodating and easy to work with.
Now...get yer ass to Roll Call! (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,96755.0.html) ;D
See you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Acceptable_Descision on June 28, 2018, 06:52:40 PM
What can I expect for my first visit?
A lot of papers to fill out and sign
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Will they grill me to death?
Not really, but just be your self and answer their questions honestly. They need to get to know you and what your needs are.
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What are some common mistakes that an individual such as me MtF would encounter when talking to the shrink?
Not telling the whole truth. There is really nothing to hide because most therapists have heard it all anyway.
One last thing is, show up at your appointments on time. Nothing is more infuriating than a no show patient. If something comes up and you cannot make the appointment, call them and let them know.
Thank you so much for your replies!!! Yea it's impossible to lye to a shrink, lol... too much to remember you know. I can't wait to speak to her. Usually, well, I do not like the VA people, but there are some good Docs out there. I think I will get tons of closure by talking with her and explaining things.
I just need to match myself up, I feel as if I'm trying to jam an apple charger into an android phone.
It's like I understand all that drug rehab, alcoholism talk, I do not drink, but the whole admitting you have a problem was my first step, validating these hidden away feelings, a ghost in the machine as it were, a C++ reference.
I have no expectations from this visit other than education and evaluation. I have a hard time with "on the spot" questions and will not talk about my thoughts/feelings much of the time, though I am improving and it feels astounding, skin tingling even.
Imagine this, you've been here: You're standing in a long checkout line at the grocery store, as you start putting your items on the conveyor belt.... OMG, you forgot milk, will you go back? No, you live with the frustration of not giving up your spot in line and therefore cheating no one but yourself. That's how I feel when I clam up in a visit with the psychologist and miss my chance to open up. I'm Changing That.
Oh I've never missed a VA appointment, I cancel the heck out of them though to fit work, always far in advance. That MyHealtheVet is awesome. We have a great team down here. The My Choice program sends us to civilian doctors, my nasal surgery became service connected the week of my appointment, and it only took about 5 months from leaning on the VA to surgery. I haven't touched a Breathe Right strip since.
Hi ,
I'm Laurie, the wandering waif of Susan's place. Welcome and come right in. I'll hold the door for you. I am also a veteran. I spent my time in the Navy. I get my care at the VA in Portland , Oregon and I cannot complain about the treatment they have given me. Around a year and a half ago I told my GP that I thought I was transgender. He asked me several questions , not a lot, and then ask if I planned on getting my HRT through the VA. (I had already started on my own. shhhhh). Then he asked if I was wanting to talk to someone , a therapist, about it. I said yes. He then proceeded to set up the psyche screening and initial therapy intake. This is the meeting that I had the most questions asked of me and they ran the gambit covering all sorts of things. Like I said it was the initial intake screening to assess my mental faculties and make sure I was capable of making rational decisions about what I was wanting.
You said you were going to see the LGBTQ coordinator. That should be a person that can see that you get on the right track and are receiving the care you want. They should set you up for the initial intake screening with a psyche who will then set you up for therapy if that is what you want. Your HRT should be prescribed for you though a doctor qualified to do so or an endocrinologist.
As others have said, it is best if you just relax and be honest. Honest not only with your care providers but honest with yourself. These are not decisions to be made lightly. They will affect not only you but those around you and possibly for the rest of your and their lives. It can cause great distress for you and them. Please be sure you want the decisions you make and are prepared to pay the cost.
Why am I making a big deal of this? Because my decisions cost me a lot and it nearly cost me my life at my own hands.
Things are better now at least for now.
I wish you all the best and a great journey once you do start. It can be great.
Hugs,
Laurie
I am rated 100% by the VA. When I have gone they have said that yes the VA should cover my meds, however I have gotten all kinds of runaround from the VA. They told me that in order to see an Endo I had to get a recommendation. The recommendation that they sent me out for was foe an actual Gender Confirmation Surgery which required being on HRT for a year before they would sign off on it. However I could not get HRT without seeing the endo. I wound up going to Planned Parenthood for HRT. It costs about $100 a month for meds but the stress of not having to deal with the VA is worth it. My Primary Care at the VA is very good but she doesn't really understand Trans issues and the consults she has been getting from higher up have not been very good.
Welcome! It's always good to see more prior service memebers on here! I've not gone through the VA yet because I'm still in, but it will be interested to see how the process works since I am receiving treatment as I serve.
To add: Just tell the therapist your story and how you discovered that you are trans, be honest about your inner feelings and you will be fine. As long as you know your own story you should be just fine answering any on the spot questions. But generally they'll want to know how the idea of transition will make you feel, how you came to understand who you are, and what led to it.
All the best though, I'm sure you will be good after jumping through a few hoops and filling out a heap of gov paperwork lol. I certainly hope that we can provide assistance and support in any way you need it!
Cheers!
-Jayden