Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: BC on July 01, 2018, 10:59:37 PM

Title: Exploring alternatives for expressing feminine gender identity
Post by: BC on July 01, 2018, 10:59:37 PM
I've pretty much relegated myself to the fact that I'm not going to be able to pass as my preferred gender without undergoing facial and neck hair removal (fair skin, dark hair, so I'm an ideal candidate for laser), which I really can't afford to do at this point in time without having a good job first.  I would love to interview and/or present in the workplace as female, but I know and feel that not passing is not going to do me any favors for a getting a professional job.

In a more professional setting, one of the best alternatives I've currently thought of would involve wearing a women's pantsuit in combination with a tomboyish dress shirt (from the women's section, of course).  If required to wear a tie, I'll wear one, and even if it's not required, I may just wear one anyway as it will make what I would like to attempt underneath the externally-visible clothing work a lot easier.  The trickiest part of this might be finding women's dress shirts that would work with neckties (as many aren't designed for this), but I could always cave in and wear a men's one if I absolutely had to; in fact, if a men's shirt is looser it would help greatly with what I would be putting underneath.  As an example of women's clothes structured like men's, I have a collared blouse styled like a dress shirt that almost buttons up to the neck, and you could easily add in a necktie with a shirt made like that (though a tie-front detail on this particular blouse means that it wouldn't make be appropriate for masculine attire unless I were somewhere where gender non-conformity was clearly OK).

With respect to what I would wear beneath my outward appearance, many of us are likely familiar with "underdressing," that is, wearing women's underwear or something similar beneath otherwise masculine clothing.  I had the idea to take this one step further, in that I would wear a business-appropriate (non-collared) top or blouse beneath my externally-visible "masculine" clothing.  This could also potentially work with adding in a necklace beneath the dress shirt (which would match the top/blouse), especially if the necklace can be concealed well.  In combination, this variation on underdressing would provide the feel of women's business attire against my body even while not outwardly presenting as feminine.  As a tactile-oriented person, this is extremely important and could provide relief from gender dysphoria even in times and places where I simply cannot express myself as feminine.

Furthermore, if I had a non-work-related business event after work that I would like to attend, I could simply ditch the dress shirt and tie and add in makeup to quickly get a feminine look.  Of course, non-makeup related skincare and clear nail polish would be important when using this strategy to outwardly present as masculine.

A typical masculine suit and tie appearance can conceal so much that I'm even thinking about working in such a setting just so I can wear what I would like underneath.  And if it's at a transgender-friendly company I can easily transition later; in fact, I'd have all the clothing I'd need with all the tops I would be collecting!  That said, a business casual setting may provide the flexibility to outwardly wear more (tomboyish) women's tops, since such a dress code is more flexible.

Please feel free to provide ideas and tips on how to execute this strategy.