Wow it's been a long time since I've been here. I know many people me because I'm a very quiet person normally. I think my last few posts were about my marriage falling apart. Basically my life has changed drastically and I've gone through homelessness and terror every since.
Anyway I have this problem and I never thought I would have. Basically when I started dating again I begin to explore polyamory. And I've had a great time with it but the basic issue is that I have fallen in love with two monogamous girls. Both knew I was polyamorous when they go out with me and have been with me as I dated other people but now both want me for themselves.
I don't even know how to say some of this. I have never ever said to anybody that I love one over the other. But the fact of the matter is that I didn't know if she would just re-commit to having a relationship with me I would leave everything behind. She broke up with me a little while ago but still remains in constant contact. She still tells me that she's in love with me but cannot handle me dating others.
The other girl I am also very deeply in love with and she's amazing and beautiful and just everything about her is pretty much perfect but for some reason just so scared to do without the other. I can't even explain my own brain properly right now so I'll just leave it at this and maybe somebody will ask questions to help clarify what's actually going on inside my brain
Honestly, I'd go with the second woman. The first one has already broken up with you once.
"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!"
Or you could do a serious think about it. Write a list of pros and cons with each woman and then count the pros and cons. Whichever one has the most pros is the one I'd go with. The other I'd make into a friend...if possible.
Good luck.
Ryuichi
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