It's about time I introduced myself after a year of not saying very much. By saying who I am, I can participate fully on this site in an open and honest manner. So, here goes. I am transitioning MTF and have been receiving HRT since December. I waited this long (I am well over 60) because there is no one to tell me that I can't. I came out to my daughter the other day, and I am eligible to retire at work (with the red tape involved, it will take forever!). I am presenting as a male at work and androgynously on weekends (these things take time). When I get my retirement squared away, events will proceed at a much faster pace.
In grade school and high school, I didn't do "boy" very well. I was socially awkward and terrible at Phys Ed. Not that I wanted to be a girl, though. I tried so hard to be a boy but never was able to succeed at it. I got called "fairy' a lot, even though was not consciously acting Gay or girly. I must have been sending out signals that I did not perceive.
From high school on, I began crossdressing in secret at home when nobody was looking. I was always afraid that somebody would find out and make fun of me.
After I got married, I came out to my wife on crossdressing, and she went along with it until she thought I was going to far. it contributed to our eventual divorce, although we remained friends afterward. That was much better for our daughter as well. I'm glad of that.
As time went on, I began to think of the possibility of transitioning, although I could not see any practical way of making it happen under the circumstances. My wardrobe was a mixture of men's and women's clothing which I combined while presenting as a male. I liked to go to a downtown bar "en femme", although not often enough, even though I always had a good time. The last couple of years, I began to see that transitioning could be possible even at my age, and started looking seriously in to the matter. The fact that I do not look my age is very comforting. I see plenty of 50 year old women who look great and are full of life. I would prefer that to looking like a 50 year old man not enjoying life. I want to be accepted as a woman. It's about time.
Thanks for listening.
Barbara
@barbara1962 Barbara:
After our lovely member @KathyLauren officially welcomed you several months ago on April 5th on another thread that you posted on I want to thank you for following her suggestion and the LINK that she provided to you to come to the Introductions Forum to let other members here know that you have joined Susan's Place.
You will find that as you post, reply and start your own threads that you will find other like-minded members that you can share give and take with... and no doubt that you can make new friends here also.
Please be certain to look over the important and informational LINKS that KathyLauren provided on her welcome message... they will help you to navigate around Susan's Place and help to get the most out of your time here and on the forums. Please pay particularly close attention to the LINKS IN RED, there is information there that will answer most questions that new members ask.
Thanks for posting here, and again Welcome to Susan's Place,
Hugs,
Danielle
Hi Barbara :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Welcome Barbara. I'm happy you are on a good path for your life. Sounds like you are ready.
Good luck,
Julie
Barbara. Your story is very familiar. I lost my first wife too due to her finding out but five years later I met another woman who has been with me for 35 years and supports my transition. I am blessed in so many ways. I hope you find happiness too. I'm 67 in Oct.
Since Susan's Place was good enough to publish my introduction, I am going to add to it. The first time I went out as Barbara, it was to take part in a Drag contest in a Gay bar. After I had finished on the stage, I milled around and mingled with the other customers. I found that I was much more at ease as Barbara than when I had been there as a guy. It was much easier to talk to people and I got along great. Although it was obvious under the circumstances that I was a guy in Drag, I felt like Barbara, as a woman.
The lesson here was obvious, but there was at that time nothing more I could really do. An serious attempt to transition would have probably cost me my job. Now, many years later, things are different. My employer is trans-friendly (our customers probably are not), so when things become obvious next year (unless I retire), Everyone will just have to accept it. In that event, I will act in a professional manner and not hit everyone with a big surprise, Who knows what will happen in a year.
My plans, if everything works out, is to have a serious facelift and start dealing with my facial hair. My other body hair seems to be reasonably under control after years of effort. This is going to work out.