Hello all,
I am a young male in my 20s, and I am unsatisfied with an obvious hourglass shape around my waist.
I was overweight when I was a child, so it might be that this left its marks a bit on my body. One of these was excess fat near my love handle region which had always exacerbated my narrow waist and hourglass shape. However since then I had lost all my excess weight, now I'm around 62-63 kg and have a generally good body composition (~11% body fat and ~43-44% skeletal muscle), so I can hardly be described as fat anymore but more like (very) lean/fit. It was extremely difficult for me to get rid of the local excess fat in the love handles region, even with very healthy eating and exercise for many years, and I had a lipo operation to remove the fat from this stubborn region.
In spite of this, although there's little fat near my love handle region anymore, I still have this hourglass shape. As a reference, my WHR is ~80%, if I'm not mistaken this is closer to the female range than the male range. See the two attached pictures and you'll see the narrow waist / large hips I'm talking about.
The stubborness of this hourglass shape is really dissapointing me, as compared to other guys I can be extremely disciplined in diet/lifestyle and STILL not achieve a normal masculine body, and a big reason behind this is that regardless of whether I have excess fat or not, my body has generally this persistent narrow waist which feigns a non-toned / no-muscle / non-masculine body even though my body composition shows the opposite. Of course some men with bad body compositon can show female characteristics, but after I have changed my body compositon it became clearer to me that this a bigger underlying issue, and that I'm potentially starting from an entirely different point than most men. I know that childhood excess weight can have permanent effects that can feminize a male body (gynecomastia etc), which stay after weight loss, but I wonder if such symptoms that I have (concentration of fat around breasts and hips) are actually more due to my biology, especially for example the large hip bones which have nothing to do with weight. Other female characteristic I have are the near absence of Appolo's belt, and a general difficultly in building muscle / a masculine body look in spite of a lot of effort (I know that testosterone levels (and their differences between men and women) can for example play a role here). I have never entertained this thought, but all of this is leading me to believe that I am not entirely male but that my body is actually more androgynous.
I would really like to get rid of this hourglass shape / narrow waist, I feel I have to work 10x more (on upper core muscles for example) than other guys to achieve any masculine look simply because my waist is way too narrow. What specifically bothers me is the discrepancy between my otherwise-good body composition (and getting that was NOT easy) and my body shape, which is much more in line with what woman with similar body composition numbers would show than what a man with those numbers would show (a quick google search confirms, I should have a ripped body according to male physique with such numbers). Indeed I feel that I can put astronomical work into sports and healthy eating but nothing can change this shape.
I'm not sure if anybody has any advice for me ? I know female-to-male transgender persons generally suffer from a biologically narrow waist that is undesirable with respect to their desired gender, so maybe if somebody overcame this problem during their transition it could also help me. Any tips for how to widen my waist specifically, or general advice on body masculinzation would be helpful.
Any other advice on transgender identity etc is also welcome.
Best
(https://preview.ibb.co/kuQyXz/IMG_9475.jpg) (https://image.ibb.co/h4tVee/IMG_9474.jpg)
Hi, C&C!
Welcome to Susan's Place.
I am not quite clear if you are FTM or a cis male. Either way, you are welcome here, and I hope that you are able to get the answers you are seeking.
Please feel free to stop by the Introductions forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html) to tell the members about yourself. Here is some information that we like to share with new members:
Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) |
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html) | Cautionary Note (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,82221.0.html) | Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866) |
This is something I experienced too and felt uncomfortable with before my transition and while presenting male... I've since seen men with the same hip curve, little body fat and even abs. I'm starting to think the human body is a lot more androgynous than people want to believe...
I'm sorry I can't directly answer your question. It's something I never could get into and still can't, but I've seen men who go into weight lifting and that seems to help. Even if just with their confidence. I think that curve at the hip that males have (I had too) can be attractive too. It's not really something I look at though but I don't think it's bad at all..
I am curious as to what you specifically are wanting to know?
If you are a cis-male then are you looking for advice on hiding a wide pelvic structure? If so my only advice is to choose your shirts and pants to limit your curves. I wore jeans that fit around my pelvic crest instead of at my waist. Larger tee shirts that hang straight down and fit loose. A tight shirt will hug your waist. I delt with feeling weird my whole time growing up. I felt like I looked girlish but I was supposed to be a boy. I hated being outside in strong winds even because it made my shirts cling against my body.
Some men have a wide pelvis. I have also found it is a very common trait in those with PAIS and kleinfelters.
other factors may effect male fetus's development like medications that block androgen receptors to some extent.
In the early stages of fetal growth certain bone shapes and joint profiles are affected by androgen hormones in males. The differences are very subtle until later in life. Without androgen's effects, the ilium remain set wider and lower. The sacrum forms a bit wider and the sacroiliac joint is formed so the sacrum angle to the ilium is more rearward and less vertical making a more flexible joint in women. The profile of the elbows and knees is also slightly greater in women or those not affected by androgens.
I think the issue is one of body image. What he looks like naked to himself. I have a very similar shape.
Normal men's clothes do an excellent job of hiding a narrow waist or hourglass shape.
While women's styles emphasize it. This is very easy to see if you look at the different styles of fitted T shirts. I just bought a pair of body hugging T shirts that fit my narrow waist. Men typically size up. Which looks terrible on small men, since doing that actually makes them look smaller. Image of a boy wearing his dad's clothes. Women usually size down, wearing very tight clothes. Women's clothes often contain a few percent of materials designed to allow the clothes to stretch, such as Lycra, Spandex, or elastane.
You are pretty much stuck with your bone structure. Which is hard to hide if your fat percentage is very low.
thanks for the feedback all. What I specifically want to know is if there's anything I can do -- with reasonable effort -- to mitigate the hourglass shape / narrow waist.
It's related to body image definitely, but I don't think it's simply in my head, as the narrow waist is unmistakable in the picture, and you have to agree this feature quite rare on men.
I never attempted to classify myself as cis-male or not, I simply never entertained the thought. I do definitely consider myself male though. It is simply that now after noticing some stuff (this among others) that I came to realize that I am slightly androgynous.
To be honest, There are cis men out there with a slight hourglass figure similar to what you have. Other than gaining weight to hide it (one of the few things my middle-age spread is good for ;) ), or wearing looser clothes, I have no idea what else you can do to hide it.
Good luck!
Ryuichi
I'm 32-26-32, which mean my waist hip ratio is very close to your's.
I would not be high on my list of things to change if I wanted to be more masculine. Height and more wealth would be on the top of that list.
As for more practical options, a properly tailored suit will easily hide that.
But, most people prefer symmetry. For women, this means we prefer the hourglass shape over someone who is top or bottom heavy.
Wanna trade for my belly bulge?