Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: HappyMoni on November 09, 2018, 10:42:52 PM

Title: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: HappyMoni on November 09, 2018, 10:42:52 PM
My old neighbor's daughter is having a baby shower tomorrow. I'm getting off my drier and going. It is one of those things that I have never done before. Just a little nervous mainly cause of my voice. Sometimes games are played at these things. Just don't want the spotlight on me. Most of the ladies knew me before and have seen me at a funeral. The subject of the shower, had expressed exuberant support for me at the funeral. She mentioned physical violence if anyone gave me a hard time. lol Anyone have any experiences with baby or bridal showers ladies?
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 09, 2018, 11:02:43 PM
Quote from: HappyMoni on November 09, 2018, 10:42:52 PM
My old neighbor's daughter is having a baby shower tomorrow. I'm getting off my drier and going. It is one of those things that I have never done before. Just a little nervous mainly cause of my voice. Sometimes games are played at these things. Just don't want the spotlight on me. Most of the ladies knew me before and have seen me at a funeral. The subject of the shower, had expressed exuberant support for me at the funeral. She mentioned physical violence if anyone gave me a hard time. lol Anyone have any experiences with baby or bridal showers ladies?

@HappyMoni
Dear Moni:
Baby showers... a right of passage for all females.... and a female only event.

I was invited and attended my very first baby shower back in April, right before I came-out to my town.   There were about a dozen ladies there and based on the conversations they all were completely unaware of my "secret" .... the conversations revolved around babies, husbands, marriages and more personal women subjects....  and all the ladies are good cooks, lots of good snack foods... and  lots of games and laughing, hugging and hand holding among everyone there.   

It was a wonderful and self affirming event to attend, unlike any male-oriented gathering or party that might include arm wrestling, belly bumping, farting and burping,  loud and boisterous talking, etc. 

You will enjoy it for sure...  I will be looking for your follow up report.
Hugs,
Danielle
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: HappyMoni on November 09, 2018, 11:08:27 PM
Thanks Danielle, I understand the no belly bumping, bad for the baby, but I will miss the farting and burping. lol

Still a little nervous!
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 10, 2018, 02:21:28 AM
Quote from: HappyMoni on November 09, 2018, 11:08:27 PM
Thanks Danielle, I understand the no belly bumping, bad for the baby, but I will miss the farting and burping. lol

Still a little nervous!


@HappyMoni
Dear Moni:
How many ladies that will be there know your "secret" ??? 
Hopefully the neighbor that invited you... 
... if you are nervous it might be best to stay close to her and be her shadow.....   

Safety in numbers!!!

Wishing you well and have a great time.
Danielle
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: KathyLauren on November 10, 2018, 07:04:39 AM
I went to my first ever baby shower back in June.  It was fun.  Nobody wanted to play games except the organizer, but she had a forceful personality and so we played games.  We all had fun grumbling about them!

Everyone there knew about my background.  This is a tiny village, so word about my coming out a couple of years ago spread quickly.  I doubt if there is anyone in the district that doesn't know about me.  The women are all nice to me.

The parents of the baby are a lesbian couple, so both parents were there.  #notyourtypicalbabyshower
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: HappyMoni on November 10, 2018, 08:40:02 AM
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on November 10, 2018, 02:21:28 AM
@HappyMoni
Dear Moni:
How many ladies that will be there know your "secret" ??? 
Hopefully the neighbor that invited you... 
... if you are nervous it might be best to stay close to her and be her shadow.....   

Safety in numbers!!!

Wishing you well and have a great time.
Danielle

Thanks @Danielle , I figure most but maybe not all know my situation. I guess with the games thing, I have that different background and I'm afraid I'll say something to make myself look foolish. (Well that never happens, right?) Like them saying, did you have a secret pal name or name of a doll growing up and I blurt out, "Bart Star (of the Green Bay Packers.) It's silly I know, but you ever get to one of those confluence times when a lot of stresses hit at the same time? That's now.

Kathy, that's cheating going to a 'lesbian baby shower.' (You know I'm kidding.) I imagine that was a good atmosphere. This group is pretty religious, straight, but accepting.
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: KathyLauren on November 10, 2018, 08:56:08 AM
Quote from: HappyMoni on November 10, 2018, 08:40:02 AM
This group is pretty religious, straight, but accepting.
That describes my group too.  The important part is "accepting".  If they have that, the rest doesn't matter. 

I felt obligated to go to the one here so that the parents wouldn't be seen as the weirdest people in the room.  It was all good.

Just relax and have fun.  If you say something surprising, just own it and admit that you have never been to a shower before.
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: HappyMoni on November 10, 2018, 10:08:46 PM
Thanks Kathy, it was bigger, less intimate than I thought, so it went well. My voice was not great tonight (it varies quite a bit) so I was quieter than usual. My old neighbor (guy) came in at the end and surprised me with a big hug and a big kiss on the check. We played a game where we put balloons under our shirts (like we pregnant) and had to walk a ping pong ball between our knees and drop them in a cup. It was fun. Didn't stand out at all. Another right of passage done.
Title: Re: Going to Baby Shower Tomorrow
Post by: Northern Star Girl on November 10, 2018, 10:18:48 PM
Quote from: HappyMoni on November 10, 2018, 10:08:46 PM
Thanks Kathy, it was bigger, less intimate than I thought, so it went well. My voice was not great tonight (it varies quite a bit) so I was quieter than usual. My old neighbor (guy) came in at the end and surprised me with a big hug and a big kiss on the check. We played a game where we put balloons under our shirts (like we pregnant) and had to walk a ping pong ball between our knees and drop them in a cup. It was fun. Didn't stand out at all. Another right of passage done.

@HappyMoni
Dear Moni:
Thank you for posting your post-baby-shower update....   I am glad it went well for you and that you had a little fun too.   These all-women events are so affiriming... 

Again, glad you had a good time and thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Hugs,
Danielle