I can't believe how hard it is doing up the clasps on a necklace that has a very petite sized clasp.
Honestly, I regularly want to cry out of frustration each time trying to get these done before going out.
I should learn, but it is often the last thing I do, when I need to be out the door. 10 minutes later without any success I just have to go out feeling a little naked, or if the weather is cool enough, wearing a scarf instead.
Why do they need to be so small?
I have never thought my fingers were overly large or clumsy before, but it really is demoralising not being able to do the (what should be a simple task) of putting on a piece of jewellery.
I have tried the trick of standing in front of the mirror and doing it in front of me so I can see. But if it is a short chain, my eyes just can't seem to focus enough (I wear glasses) at the right distance, or the left/right reversal in the mirror confuses my hand coordination so much.
Frustrated!
~Dee.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fprime59.com%2Fimages%2FIMG_20181129_104446.jpg&hash=fadc2470398d6c87095c71e6c2a0fda028eda6d7)
Cis women have the same problems, but they all started practicing when they were 5. Give it time.
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I taught myself by first doing it in front of me with my eyes closed. Once I figured out how to grab the little tab using my thumb nail and how it felt when I had the other end inside the clasp, it made doing it behind my head much easier.
You can also apply a bra method to this and just clasp it in front of yourself and then spin the whole thing around.
Well the straping the bra with the strap in front of it then swinging around that is an excellent method for putting on a bra or you can just buy the one with the front clasp but for necklaces I don't use the tip of my thumb nail or fingernail I use the side of it and it seems to give me a better grip on it and it stays open long enough for me to get it in the hole and hooked up
If you can't accept yourself, how can you expect others to accept you?
Quote from: Arianna Valentine on November 28, 2018, 06:20:00 PM
Well the straping the bra with the strap in front of it then swinging around that is an excellent method for putting on a bra or you can just buy the one with the front clasp but for necklaces I don't use the tip of my thumb nail or fingernail I use the side of it and it seems to give me a better grip on it and it stays open long enough for me to get it in the hole and hooked up
That is a very good method to learn. I have worn necklaces with small clasps since I was a kid. I also always helped my mom and sisters and wife do theirs.
Practice, Practice, Practice!
Lacy
I feel your pain Dee. They can be quite maddening. As others have said, I think they key is just wearing necklaces regularly and doing it hundreds/thousands of times. On a related note....when I first got some chain necklaces, I lazily stored them together in a small bag. Quite the discovery that they were sentient things that liked to intertwine into knots.
Are you aware of the paperclip method? It works wonderfully for bracelets etc, I'm not sure for necklaces as I can't wear them.
I was actually pretty good with those things until last year. I damaged a muscle and ligament in my shoulder and then had to have "rotator cuff surgery." Now I can't get my right hand back far enough behind my neck to do it. I'll have to try the "in front" method. I keep stretching my arm back there like the doctor and physical therapist said to, but so far no luck. Doctor finally told me that very few people who have that surgery ever get back to what they had previously.
It's hell getting old. ;D
Most of mine, I can fasten behind my neck. Some of the ones that I inherited from my mother have weird clasps, and I have to practise a few times before I can try fastening them around my neck. My favourite "every day" necklace has a teeny-tiny loop that is impossible to find behind my neck. So I do the bra method: I fasten it in front and spin it around.
Quote from: GordonG on November 28, 2018, 07:37:03 PM
I was actually pretty good with those things until last year. I damaged a muscle and ligament in my shoulder and then had to have "rotator cuff surgery." Now I can't get my right hand back far enough behind my neck to do it. I'll have to try the "in front" method. I keep stretching my arm back there like the doctor and physical therapist said to, but so far no luck. Doctor finally told me that very few people who have that surgery ever get back to what they had previously.
It's hell getting old. ;D
It has taken just over a year since radiotherapy wrecked my shoulders and I couldn't raise my arms above my chest. I have followed the physiotherapists instructions and been to the gym 2-3 times a week carefully following exercise instructions and I can now get my arms above my head and have pretty good mobility again. It has been a fight but you keep fighting Honey and see what you can achieve.
Quote from: Cindy on November 28, 2018, 07:41:55 PM
...but you keep fighting Honey and see what you can achieve.
Oh I will Cindy. Thanks
Although I can get usually get the ring clasps or lobster claw clasps hooked up fairly quickly, they can be quite frustrating at times. You may want to consider a magnetic clasp. On occasion a few strands of hair get caught between the magnets, but they still hold firm. These are not the cheapest ones, but they have worked great for me. They connect to the existing clasps and add about 3/4 of an inch to the length of the chain.
https://www.amazon.com/Sterling-Silver-Magnetic-Converter-Necklaces/dp/B00X69SNHO
Thank you for all the tips.
Cindy, I had never heard of the paper clip method for bracelets, but will keep it for reference in the future. (It doesn't work for necklaces as far as I can figure out.)
Jessica, the magnetic claps look helpful. Will investigate those further.
I have been practising this since originally posting. The do it in the front bra method, I can't get to work. Lack of coordination and difficulty focusing my eyes well enough a right distance, makes it quite tricky.
After much experimentation, with the behind the neck approach I decided the thumb and forefinger nails of my left hand (growing all my nails) are basically getting in the way too much and don't let me have enough sense of where everything is.
Okay, don't know if I just did something a bit rash, but I have trimmed those two nails only, and now my success rate has gone up dramatically.
Is having a short nail on the thumb and forefinger a good solution? Have I been too impatient?
I am not sure, but right now, I feel satisfied.
~Dee
Quote from: Jessica_Rose on November 28, 2018, 08:33:16 PMYou may want to consider a magnetic clasp. On occasion a few strands of hair get caught between the magnets, but they still hold firm. These are not the cheapest ones, but they have worked great for me. They connect to the existing clasps and add about 3/4 of an inch to the length of the chain.
Jessica, Thank you so much! The more I look those and think about how they work I can see they are a great idea.
I can see them saving me time, even if I keep my nails short!
~Dee.
Quote from: KathyLauren on November 28, 2018, 07:40:09 PM
Most of mine, I can fasten behind my neck. Some of the ones that I inherited from my mother have weird clasps, and I have to practise a few times before I can try fastening them around my neck. My favourite "every day" necklace has a teeny-tiny loop that is impossible to find behind my neck. So I do the bra method: I fasten it in front and spin it around.
The "lobster" clasps are the easiest to work with, especially of course the larger ones. The little tiny "circle/ring" clasps can be very difficult especially when the mating ring/loop is very small as well.
Fingernails are essential sometimes when operating the clasps and hooking them up....
...and the
"fasten in the front and spin it around" method that
@kathylauren mentioned is very handy when having difficulty.
The little screw together clasps are OK but will come undone unless they are well tightened.
The
magnetic clasps are good but if you wear other adjacent and nearby jewelry that contains "ferrous metals" problem arise with the magnets attracting the other jewelry.
Danielle
Quote from: Jessica_Rose on November 28, 2018, 08:33:16 PM
Although I can get usually get the ring clasps or lobster claw clasps hooked up fairly quickly, they can be quite frustrating at times. You may want to consider a magnetic clasp. On occasion a few strands of hair get caught between the magnets, but they still hold firm. These are not the cheapest ones, but they have worked great for me. They connect to the existing clasps and add about 3/4 of an inch to the length of the chain.
https://www.amazon.com/Sterling-Silver-Magnetic-Converter-Necklaces/dp/B00X69SNHO
Thank you for this link! I have one necklace that is so short and tight that I have a hard time to take it off! I can close it OK, but opening is a problem! Problem solved with the help of your link!
If you just need to add some length, these seem to be of good quality. The chains are thin but sturdy, not like the ones which resemble logging chains. This is a set of three extensions, 2-inch, 4-inch, and 6-inch. They have lobster clasps on one end, which are usually a bit easier to use than the ring clasps:
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B01MQFLP8X/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
I'm reading this and laughing. Lady problems....
Seriously, they can be challenging. I do my partners all the time when she can't get it. And she does mine but for me, it's mostly getting them off that I have a problem with. LOL
Quote from: Jessica_Rose on November 29, 2018, 06:39:40 AM
If you just need to add some length, these seem to be of good quality. The chains are thin but sturdy, not like the ones which resemble logging chains. This is a set of three extensions, 2-inch, 4-inch, and 6-inch. They have lobster clasps on one end, which are usually a bit easier to use than the ring clasps:
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B01MQFLP8X/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Thanks so much!
You are a never ending resource for me doing well in my transition!
Take this little dance as my thank you! :icon_dance:
Dietlind
Quote from: BrianaJ on November 29, 2018, 07:20:58 AM
I'm reading this and laughing. Lady problems....
Seriously, they can be challenging. I do my partners all the time when she can't get it. And she does mine but for me, it's mostly getting them off that I have a problem with. LOL
In the movies they always just rip off any necklace there is. Supposedly it does no harm to the jewelry and can continue being removed that way time and time again!
Lacy
Quote from: RealLacy on November 29, 2018, 04:26:34 PM
In the movies they always just rip off any necklace there is. Supposedly it does no harm to the jewelry and can continue being removed that way time and time again!
Lacy
With the magnetic clasps you can basically just yank them off, but you still need to be careful. There have been a few occasions when I started pulling hard on my necklace only to realize it did NOT have a magnetic clasp!
It certainly is a joy to have 'lady problems' like these! Although things like this used to irritate me, now I think for a second or two and smile. Transitioning is not easy, but it opens the door to a world full of simple pleasures. If I ever think I am having a bad day I think about what I have done, and I can't help but smile. I hope all of you have a 'best day ever' today.
Love always -- Jessica Rose
Thank you Jessica_Rose, I wish you the same!
And I ordered those magnetic thingies and the necklace extenders! Now I can beautify myself without breaking my arms!
On the bra, rather than spinning it around, I put the cups on and put my arms through the straps. Then I line up the hooks in front of me and without letting go, move my arms around to the back and fasten them. Muscle memory lets me go right back to the alignment I had in front of me. Try it. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn on November 30, 2018, 09:16:02 AM
On the bra, rather than spinning it around, I put the cups on and put my arms through the straps. Then I line up the hooks in front of me and without letting go, move my arms around to the back and fasten them. Muscle memory lets me go right back to the alignment I had in front of me. Try it. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Can't do this. Rotator Cuff damage in both shoulders prevents my arms to reach that far back.