I have been out and living full time for a few months now...since early summer. It was a slow shift for me rather than a sudden debut. I still have three business contacts I need to get around to coming out to, but after that anyone who needs to know will.
That said, I am starting to run into people who knew me as John and they don't even realize they know me. I feel good about that. I have only filled in a few people who I wanted to know. Mostly people who have helped me a long the way.
This seems to be happening every other day. I'm starting to feel truly like Virginia and less like John trying to be Virginia. I don't really feel like I owe an explanation to anyone and I certainly don't want have discussions about it over and over again. After all these years I am starting to leave the past behind and be the person I want to be which I just never thought would happen.
I kind of worry when people find out, as some will, they may be offended or just ticked off. In my mind that is no reason to disclose my transition to anyone. I mean, I'm sure these people can tell I am trans, they just can't tell that they knew me before. Am I wrong? Is there any reason I should be open about this?
Thanks in advance.
Virginia
For me new people I meet will only know me as female, but I don't hide the past either. The past is what gave me the strength to transition and I won't leave it behind. Just my take on it. :)
I am still pre-transition, so don't have any direct experience with this speficially. But as far as personal info goes in general, for me personally, it's all on a need to know basis! I would only feel like I had to tell someone about any detail of my personal life if I valued their relationship and not saying anything might strain it. This is something I address on a case by case basis since my relationship to each person in my life is highly unique.
I realize that's not much, but perhaps it will help :).
Do whatever you feel comfortable doing. I don't try and hide the truth I just want to be accepted for who I am and perceived and accepted as the gender I identify with. But it is nice to be read as a woman and pass and not always have to share I'm trans to everyone I interact with.
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I don't generally feel the need to disclose my past to everyone I meet.
But, in the case of people with whom I had a prior relationship, whether personal, business, or recreational, I think they need to know the fact of my transition in order to preserve that relationship. They don't need to know juicy details, just that "he" is now Kathy.
Quote from: Virginia 71 on December 01, 2018, 11:12:26 PM
I am starting to run into people who knew me as John and they don't even realize they know me. I feel good about that. I have only filled in a few people who I wanted to know. Mostly people who have helped me a long the way.
This seems to be happening every other day. I'm starting to feel truly like Virginia and less like John trying to be Virginia.
Virginia
Hello Virginia
The meetings with those who don't see the previous you and your latest feelings are both very uplifting and must make you so happy.
I am on HRT 10 months and will publicly transition in 2019. I agree with you. You have no obligation to tell anyone other than those you choose to tell. That is also my plan.
Hugs
Pamela