Hello ladies I'd like to ask some advice about my situation: Currently I work as a man, men's work attire, boots, heavy fire resistant clothing, safety goggles etc in the oil field. Most of the people I work around are pretty accepting and some are simply ignorant and uneducated. Couple problems I have keeping this position:
1. It does not allow me to transition nearly as easy, hinders my forward progress.
2. The salary is waaaaay too high: traps me in to something I'm no longer interested because I cannot easily walk away from a 6-figure salary due to financial obligations..ie: House and car payments.
3. I work an INSANE number of hours a week, sometimes over a hundred, consuming my life at times.
Last week I had an interview with the local hospital business office and they loved me and want to schedule a second interview in 4 days. It's an all female office, no men. Only problem is the pay is like less than 1/2 of my current salary.
Huge plus side is I get to go to work in girl mode, full time. During the initial interview I told them I'm TG and going through transition. They embraced me and my decision to be genuine.
Is it worth giving up my high end job? Have others regretted doing the same things? Is the stress of money matters going to leave me in a worse position?
Any input that would help me make a better decision would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.
Sophia
outside looking in it's easy to say "give up the money" You have to decide that one. Can you downgrade home and lifestyle to support a lower income? How fast can do do that? You don't want the lower pay job then end up stressing about money, late payments, or bankruptcy.
My instant first thought:
Give up the money, go for the new job. Life is too short. Be yourself, be happy.
I might end up in the minority, but I say transition as much as you feel comfortable with the current job if you want to stay in that income bracket, that is. Wear your hair long and in ponytails, paint your nails, wear as much makeup as won't get all over your safety gear, and whatnot.
If the others ask, explain your transitioning to them, with HR's help. Helping people that are transitioning is part of HR's job, after all.
If they don't, then keep working for as long as you want/feel comfortable doing so.
Ryuichi
If you can afford the pay cut, no reason not to take the new job.
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There is also the question of how long your can realistically continue to do your current job. Sounds like a lot of stress on the body.
I could have bought a much bigger house than the one I'm living in now, but I paid off the mortgage years ago!
Maybe not for you, but if I retired today I'd have plenty of savings to continue my present lifestyle.
This is a decision that's completely up to you. You're going to have to make sacrifices whichever way you go. Stay in the oilfields and wait to transition, you'll have to stifle your feelings. That can make things bad for you mentally. Stay in the oilfields and start to transition, you'll have to deal with coworkers potentially treating you poorly. Take the new job, you'll have to make sacrifices with you budget, selling the nice big house, moving. But to me, the fact that you went to the interview tells me that's what you truly desire.
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Quote from: Sophiaprincess2019 on March 08, 2019, 06:04:22 AMI cannot easily walk away from a 6-figure salary due to financial obligations..ie: House and car payments.
No kids? No "ex-wives"? Fancy cars? No exorbitant college tuition payouts (for an education they'll prolly not use?) Definitely agree on the "downsize" (the more ya make the more ya spend?) my mortgage is easily half what "renters" are paying around here and, if planning to transition, I tend to look for jobs that are unisex, not
gender specific makes many things a whole lot easier!
Sorry if too many "q"s, didn't read past posts!
Mortages and loans can be renegotiated if necessary. I have never earned a six-figure salary in my life. If I had, I'm sure I could have thought of stuff to spend it on, but my point is that most people can live quite comfortable on less.
Is the extra income worth having to live someone else's life? That is the question you should ask yourself. Your life as your true self is like your soul. Would you sell your soul for money?
Yeah, I know I make it sound easy. ::) I know it is a tough choice to make. The choice that I would make is not necessarily the right one for you. I think
@Faith asked a pertinent question: it is not necessarily
can you downgrade your lifestyle, but can you do it
fast enough? Only you can answer that.
Thanks everyone. I have a much clearer idea of what I need to do. There is no amount of money that is worth my happiness. I think I'll put everything I have into landing this job, I think it's going to be worth it to stay true to myself and live MY life MY way. Thanks everyone for your help. I knew I could count my extended SP family!
Much love!
Sophia
You'll be working less than half the hours with the new job, just pick up a part time job for 10-20 hours a week and your still 40 hours down on work time at least and you can be yourself.
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