Hi All,
I hope I am doing this right (posting operation) Yes you read that right I have been visiting this site since 1996. This was shortly after I finally had a name (M to F) Transgender to explain how I had been feeling basically all my life. This was all thanks to this wonderful new thing called the internet and it led me right to Susan's Place.
Learning that this was what I am was a shock to me to say the least. I come from a small town in Canada and it was shortly after the birth of our first child. I kept this secret to my self for many years just suffering in silence. In fact my life paralleled Susan's in many ways I'm just a couple years older. In the next seven years we had two more children and still I kept fighting to keep it at bay. Finally 10 years ago I broke down and confessed to my wife. It did not go well and we agreed to never speak of it again. The next ten years were pure hell, don't get me wrong I have a wonderful family and a great home life but still I was left with the daily turmoil of my situation.
Fast forward 10 years and I am doing things I never dreamed of. I came out to my wife for a second time, kids still don't know and have been seeing a counselor and gender specialist for a year and have been on HRT for 9 months and I feel fantastic! My wife is putting up with it with a lot of resistance and not necessarily accepting it but hasn't left me so that's where I am at today. Sorry for the long post and nice to finally meet you all.
Hey Jessica :)
Just wow, I don't even knew this site exist so long :D
Internet is really great thing. One of most important part of transitioning is realisation that there is people with same problems who overcoming it by proceed through this process. I actually learn about existans of transgenders two years ago, and before I just been sure that I doomed to live this live in male. And Susan's Place one of biggest resources which provide information about us.
Happy to know you feel so great :) I congrats you with registration and hope everything will turn good with your family :)
Hi, Jessica!
Welcome to Susan's Place.
Wow, that is a long time to hold it in! At least you had access to other people's stories in that time.
I am happy that you are making progress now, even if it means stress at home. I hope your wife comes to understand that you are the same person, just happier.
Here is some information that we like to share with new members:
Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) |
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html) | Cautionary Note (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,82221.0.html) | Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866) |
Hi Jessica, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm Jessica too!
23 years is a long time to be in the readers zone and I'm so happy you have stepped into the warmth inside our doors.
Our wonderful Greeter
@KathyLauren has welcomed you with her grace, charm and with some very handy links to information that can help you with the site. Give them a look see.
Hugs and smiles, Jessica
Welcome.
Quote from: Jessica311 on May 02, 2019, 07:06:17 PM
Hi All,
I hope I am doing this right (posting operation) Yes you read that right I have been visiting this site since 1996. This was shortly after I finally had a name (M to F) Transgender to explain how I had been feeling basically all my life. This was all thanks to this wonderful new thing called the internet and it led me right to Susan's Place.
Learning that this was what I am was a shock to me to say the least. I come from a small town in Canada and it was shortly after the birth of our first child. I kept this secret to my self for many years just suffering in silence. In fact my life paralleled Susan's in many ways I'm just a couple years older. In the next seven years we had two more children and still I kept fighting to keep it at bay. Finally 10 years ago I broke down and confessed to my wife. It did not go well and we agreed to never speak of it again. The next ten years were pure hell, don't get me wrong I have a wonderful family and a great home life but still I was left with the daily turmoil of my situation.
Fast forward 10 years and I am doing things I never dreamed of. I came out to my wife for a second time, kids still don't know and have been seeing a counselor and gender specialist for a year and have been on HRT for 9 months and I feel fantastic! My wife is putting up with it with a lot of resistance and not necessarily accepting it but hasn't left me so that's where I am at today. Sorry for the long post and nice to finally meet you all.
@Jessica311 Dear Jessica I am so very glad that you have become a member here after 23 years of visiting this site and that you have started posting in the Forums.
As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are. I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here.
For sure this is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
I see that our lovely member
@KathyLauren has already given you a big WELCOME ...
...but please allow me to also warmly
WELCOME you to Susan's Place.
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members. When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others
and offer support to others. ....
There is a very good chance that you might find that you will
make some new like-minded friends here on the Forums.
Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
Attached at the end of
KathyLauren Welcome Message are important and informative
LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.
Please look closely at the
LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.
Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle
Hi Jessica :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
The Grand Poobah of Lurking has arrived! :)
Welcome to Susan's Place, Jessica!
Hugs, Devlyn
Wow :angel:, Thank You all for the warm welcomes! It feel's like I know most of you already as I said I've been here for years. I look forward to getting to know everyone for real.
I basically work two full time jobs so I am not sure how much I'll be posting during the summer months but will make an effort for sure. Being Transgender is expensive but that's a whole other thread
Thanks Again,
Jessica.
Jessica,
Welcome after all these years! Obviously, your story is much like many of us here. I can relate! I only talked with a counselor for the first time today. I have a long way to go, but not a long time to do it (I am 63). I do hope to hear from you more! Marsha
That's some top-tier lurking, I must say! I've only lurked for a mere two years or so (I just registered last night)! :laugh:
I'm so sorry things didn't go well the first round with coming out to your mate. Not everyone can be understanding, and it's not always through fear, or even bigotry. Sometimes, it's just lack of exposure to what they might think of as unusual or out of the norm. Mind you, it's been however many years for the idea to stew in the back-brain for her, and for it to come more forward with all the news-stories about transgender issues and the like. Now that more research into the what transgender is, and what it's not, maybe your wife will be able to come around.
Welcome to posting on the site! And your post isn't long at all. At least not in comparison to my danged-near novel-length. Hmm, maybe I should edit it, if that's possible... :laugh:
Hi Jessica,
My name isn't Jessica, its Monica, but I can pretend to be a Jessica if it will help you come out and play more. lol Your patience is only matched by your mental strength, I must say. Holding it in that long, wow! I'll say this to you and any other lurkers out there, there are a lot who understand what you are going through. Come on, it helps to talk about it. Really, we won't bite. Well, we won't leave marks anyway! ;D I'm so glad you are here and talking, Jessica. Congrats on your progress!
Quote from: Jessica311 on May 02, 2019, 07:06:17 PM
...This was shortly after I finally had a name (M to F) Transgender to explain how I had been feeling basically all my life....
Welcome and I am so happy that you have started your journey to live as yourself. The line I quoted above is close to what I experienced as in I knew something was off, I could never quite put a finger on it though. I am sorry that your spouse seems less than supportive and I hope you find friends, family, a therapist, and/or a support group that is. While I would still transition even without the people I have in my life, I am certain that there would be a lot more tears involved.
If you wish to see why I felt we have some things in common, please find my story in my signature, and know that you deserve to be happy too.
I see you,
Ricki
I had been lurking on Susan's for 13 years before starting to transition late last year...but I did lurk on old transgender Usenet boards back in the early 90s, so I know where you're coming from. So great to finally be able to transition, yes?
Welcome!
Sarah
It must have been nearly 2 decades ago that I first visited this site. I didn't follow it much, but recently I've felt as though I should connect more with people like myself. It can be a lonely road to walk alone.
Quote from: Haley Conner on May 16, 2019, 09:56:26 AM
It must have been nearly 2 decades ago that I first visited this site. I didn't follow it much, but recently I've felt as though I should connect more with people like myself. It can be a lonely road to walk alone.
It can be very lonely indeed. That's probably one of the most challenging parts of this whole walk for me. I have a few supportive friends but a lot of people just have no idea what it's like to live your life in the wrong body.
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