Hi there. I am 11 days post-surgery (full 'genital reconstruction'). My surgeon was Mr Bellringer in London and I am using the Soul Source violet (2.86cm diameter) and blue (3.18mm diameter) dilators that his staff gave me. I can now comfortably get to 5 dots on the violet, but only to 3 dots with the blue and this feels like a barrier that is very difficult to get through.
You would think that it should be easy to progress from violet to blue, right, cos the difference in quoted diameter is only 2.2mm... The thing is, the quoted diameters refer to the bases of the dilators, but if you hold one in front of the other and inspect their 'heads' you can immediately see that the size and shape of the 'heads' are very different indeed and the blue looks much more difficult to insert that the violet - and that is what I am experiencing! So far as I can tell from their website, Soul Source do not do anything in between these two sizes.
Can you suggest any vendors that might do dilators between the Soul Source violet and blue in size?
Another question... I have been told by Mr Bellringer's staff that I only have a fairly short time to reach my optimum depth (around 11-18 days post-surgery) because the stitches will probably have healded by then; this is fine cos i am very happy with the 5 dots (which equates to about 5.5" of vagina depth) that I have achieved. But they are vague when I ask them about width. Common sense would tend to indicate that the same sort of time restriction would apply to achieving you optimum width as well, ie around 18 days post-surgery. But I've seen some posts on this site that seem to indicate that some post-op trans girls are still working on their width much later than this.
Thank you! (Hoping this doesn't break the sites TOS. My sincere apologies if it does.)
Daniella Gordon
Hi Daniella
Welcome to Susan's. I hope you enjoy your time here.
As far as soul source dilators go, I use them myself and went from purple to blue after about 5 weeks. I don't remember any restrictions about depth but then for the first 14 days I only used the purple one and up to the first dot was the best I could mange and now the blue one "vanishes" so to speak. I had a girlfriend who had the same issue as you and it was one of those things that took time and persistence to be able to get the blue one in properly. I know with my friend hers was a psychological barrier and it wasn't until she got herself examined that she was confident enough to apply enough force and be relaxed enough for it to go to the first dot or deeper. As far as girth goes that is certainly something you can improve over time as I have experienced exactly that.
I had to go back a size due to another complication but will be back to the green one again in a few weeks as the other issue is slowly healing. The regime I used to mover from one to the other was 15 minutes with the smaller one and 5 with the larger and only when that was comfortable did I go to 10 and ten and then 15 and 5 etc etc
Someone may know of in between size and I am sure they will post if they can.
Please feel free to head over to our Introduction forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html) and tell us a little bit about yourself
So you are able to get the very best from being here there are a couple of links we give to all our new members
Regards
Liz
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Hi Liz. Thank you for your swift reply! <3
Wow, so you went from purple to blue after 5 weeks. According to what my nurses told me, your internal stitches would have thoroughly healed by then, so it seems it is still possible to stretch the vaginal wall (substantially) after stitches have healed. That is very encouraging and would seem to indicate that I don't have to rush to much too achieve the width I want right now.
Thank you again. :)
Daniella Gordon Ps: I have just corrected a typo in my previous message: I have modified the word "depth" to "width" in the last paragraph.
@davego Dear Daniella Gordon Greetings, it is wonderful that you have decided to become a member here and that you have started posting in the Forums.
As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are. I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here.
For sure this is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
I see that our lovely member
@LizK has already welcomed you but please allow me to also warmly
WELCOME you to Susan's Place.
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members. When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others
and offer support to others. ....
***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will
make some new like-minded friends here.
Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
Attached near at the end of
LizK's message are important and informative
LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.
Please look closely at the
LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.
Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle
@davego Oh, and another thing Daniella Gordon...
As our lovely member @LizK suggested in her Welcome Message to you and had given you the LINK, please plan to write a post and tell us more about yourself in the Introductions Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html) so that other members will be aware of your arrival... therefore you will be able to share your thoughts with more members here.
Thank you again for joining Susan's Place and being involved in the Forums here.
Best wishes to you,
DanielleNOTE: Now after all of this Greeting Stuff I will let everyone have this thread back so that the exchange of conversation can continue.
Other members here will certainly be along to give you their comments and suggestions that you may be seeking
Hi, here is the web site:
https://www.soulsource.com/collections/grs-vaginal-dilators
Hi Rachel! Thank you for the link. :) Based on the diameters given on that webpage, there is nothing between violet 28.6mm (size #1) and blue 31.8mm (size #2); and that's what I feel I need.
Since my last post here, I have come across the Pai Clinic dilators:
http://pai.co.th/dilator-grs/
and there is are 28mm and 31mm options. The 31mm option should in theory be a little smaller than Soul Source's size blue #2 (31.8mm), which might help me, so I would like to buy this. But there does not appear to be a way to buy it on their website, so I am ringing them later today.
Thanks again. Daniella :)
Update...
I decided to pay some money and go and see the senior practice nurse at a private transgender clinic in London. She was totally amazing and spent a good hour showing me how to dilate. She corrected my posture (which I learned was causing me huge problems) and gave me some tips on how to manipulate the dilator. While I was with her I felt, for the first time, the 'end point' of my vagina (at dot 5) with the violet dilator! It felt like the end of a firm-ish sock! Then she inserted the blue dilator and took me to dot 4. She explained that with the larger, blue, dilator the end point will be less deep than with the violet dilator because the vagina reshapes itself to accommodate the wider girth of the blue dilator, so dot 4 was possibly my end point for blue.
This is totally amazing! I can now reach the end points for the violet, and possibly blue, dilator - and without anything like the pain/discomfort that I was experiencing before. So I now no longer feel the need for a dilator between violet and blue. I wept tears of relief during this consultation and have been able to replicate the results at home. <huge sigh of relief> :)
Now I just have to wait for my flipping sores to heal, which I'm told takes weeks! :-/ LOL :) Daniella