Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I decided some time after coming out to my wife, about several months after I started going out in public again, that I didn't feel comfortable with the wedding band I received on my wedding day. I also wasn't comfortable with going out without one at all because I felt that it would be best for me to wear one since I am married. Plus it gives me a much needed out when I'm getting hit on while I'm out.

I have two wedding band/engagement ring sets, one silver and diamond the other gold/diamond, they aren't real but i don't mind since that are more symbolic than anything else. If anyone gets the expensive gold and jewels it's my SO and not me... Thankfully she isn't and gold and jewels kind of girl.

When i go out as male, I wear my wedding band I received when I married.  I do this for my wife more than anything.  However, when I go out as female, I have a couple of cheap women's rings that I wear and switch between.  Once I am living fulltime, I will get a new better quality woman's ring that I will wear all the time.

Melissa

I don't wear mine for two reasons.

First, the band is a little small for me nowadays.

Second, I always removed my band (when it fit) when I was working with chemicals and lab materials as a point of safety.  So, it became a habit not to wear it.

Chaunte

I always wear my wedding band.  A few years.............or more back we got a new set of wedding bands of gold. But recently I have been wearing the older band on the opposite hand. My wife's rings and my rings are identical except the size. I am committed to staying with her as long as she will have me and the rings are a sign of our 36 plus years of commitment to one another. Now that I come out to her I'm sure she has noticed that I'm wearing both bands. I want her to know that even if our relationship is changing I still love her as much and more than I every have.
Yes Chaunte I understand about the work place. When I worked in a factor I took my ring off to protect it and my finger but I always put it back on when I went home.
:)
Jillieann

I always wore mine when I was married and would if I found the right woman again. My first ex would hardly ever wear hers and it bugged me cause it was a sign of our commitment. On the other hand, she stayed friends with me and the second ex, who would get pissed off if I took my ring off to wash my hands, dumped me the second I wanted to transition.

Go figure.

Dennis

I put it on 23 years ago and that's where it stays.

Cassie

Gillian and I no longer wear our wedding rings.  Although we have been legally married  for 33 years (still are), and been together for 38 years we are now in a different relationship and we are comfortable with that.

Steph

Quote from: Cassandra Anna Hefton on February 23, 2006, 11:35:49 PM
I put it on 23 years ago and that's where it stays.

Cassie

That is rather my thoughts on the subject as well, although I've never had the chance.

Quote from: Kimberly on February 24, 2006, 07:10:59 AM
That is rather my thoughts on the subject as well, although I've never had the chance.

I tried to keep that thought process too... But like Chaunte, I found that there were too many activities in my life where wearing my ring was more detrimental. Rock Climbing, paddling and playing guitar all come to mind.

Welding is another exceedingly good reason to take the ring and all the rest off too, by the by

I have always worn mine, it will be 42 years this year.  As long as I am married, or still living in the same house, I will wear it.  There is no reason not to wear it, our marriage was a binding agreement that I abide by.  Back when I got married, we still believed that marriage was for life.  My transitioning has nothing to do with the committment I made that day.

Luckily both of our rings are exactly the same, so you can't tell if it is a man's or woman's ring.

Sarah L.

I can't imagine taking mine off. My wife takes hers off at night and sometimes forgets to put them on when she goes out. I would feel undressed without mine. Mine is a half round which is really unisex anyway so it wouldn't be a problem whether I was dressed or not.

Shelley

we bought our wedding bands before she told me.... so we got her a chunky titanium mens wedding band... it was cool, but totally not what she wanted... I felt so bad for her... 

But! we were lucky, the rings had quite a long return policy on them...

After she told me, we went back to the jeweler and exchanged it for something that she WANTED... which was awesome :) she wears it regularly.... we each take them off on occasion when they get irritating.. (neither one of us are jewelry people... when it gets tight or itchy I take it off for a few hours to let my hand breathe) otherwise they stay on :)

our first anniversary is in May :)

A few years ago my wife and I bought new matching gold bands.  With the passage of years our original bands no longer fit well and we wanted to get something that looked nicer than what we could afford back when we were first married.  Since the bands are matching the style is unisex and goes well with either my male or female attire.   :)

Louise

We are on our second set of wedding bands.  My first was stolen and I lost my second at work about a year ago and havent replaced it yet.  I was wanting to replace it but havent yet ... I feel a little backed off without it, but want to go ring shoping with my wife again so we can find a set we really like.

Possibly we can find a set that matches nicely and fits us closely, just to make us feel right about it. We haven't paid much attention to me simply replacing mine as we want it to be a mutual thing.

Louise, missed a couple of replies to you in other topics.  Thank you,  I'm simply regaining my composure, I'll try not to be so composure.

Terri

Hey Terri,

You be what ever as long as your here with us that's all that matters.

Shelley

I've been in jobs where rings and such wouldn't be good to wear - see chemicals, machinery, etc.  Lost the sucker sometime last year and it wasn't in the old house when we moved.  At this point, I really don't wear one although I should try to get one again at some point.

I wear mine all the time.  I am fortunate that despite not having acknowledged that I was trans to myself or my wife I still got a masculine type ring.  Although we are not legally married --- something I hope to do once I full transition....I still consider it a marriage

Wow!! what a nice post. It's so nice to hear so much love and commitment here.

    When I was married,(28 years ago) my wife gave me her daddies ring. She thought all men wore the same size ring. It never fit. I wore it on my pinky finger ever since . Recently I told that I wouldn't  mind one that I could wear on the proper finger. I hope she gets me a pretty one. :)

   Erocse 

You realise that you guys have necro'd a 4 year old thread?

Quote from: Shauna Marie on February 23, 2006, 09:06:34 PM
I don't wear mine for two reasons.

First, the band is a little small for me nowadays.

Second, I always removed my band (when it fit) when I was working with chemicals and lab materials as a point of safety.  So, it became a habit not to wear it.

Chaunte

When we got married we were really broke and bought the cheapest rings we could find. They both quickly wore down to sharp edges.

Niether of us would wear ours wehn working. After a few years, we found the sharp edges cutting into our fingers. My wife got a nast infection at one point.

We looked for replacements. But decided, at the last minute that they simply are not ncecessary. We both know who each other is. neither of us feels any insecurity about what others think. (And as most people who know us will say, we deserve each other! )

So, no, we don't wear them as such. My wife has hers on a neck chain with a crusafix she got when she was confirmed. I have mine on the neck of a small bell which sits on a small shelf in our lounge.

I am still married to my wife of 41 years and worn a man's wedding band with diamonds in it,till a couple of years ago,somebody asked why a woman would wear a man's ring so my wife took my ring the next day to the jewelers and a week later presented me with an engagement ring with one diamond in it and a wedding band with two diamonds in it that fits around it. I am lucky to have her and still have that love and caring,she was a lot of help while i was transitioning and still has to correct me every so often!!!

I always wear my wedding band, you can even see me wearing it in most of my videos. I love my wedding band though there is a tiny part of me that would like a woman's wedding ring as well. We shall see

I wear the mens ring my wife gave me when we were married.
When we have our recomitmant cerimony, (probably a year after orchi) I will be wanting a feminine ring set.

My wife and I dont wear wedding bands any more.  my wife, because her fingers has out grown them, and I dont because of the work i do.

I don't go out dressed as of yet but I have seen my wedding band advertised to both men and women.  Eventually my wife is going to get me an engagement ring when we are ready to renew our vows as the girls.

Quote from: cynthialee on September 23, 2010, 09:55:19 AM
You realise that you guys have necro'd a 4 year old thread?

So what? what's the big deal? I don't understand why that's a problem?

BACK ON SUBJECT:

On Rings. I would wear mine out, but take it off to sleep! I would forget to put it back on in the mornings eventially I hardly wore mine because I just don't like wearing jewelery my S.O. would get upset at me saying I was taking a year off our marriage everytime I didn't wear it, that I was embarrassed of her or that it showed that I didn't love her and wasn't committed!  I don't wear mine and I am committed she always wears hers and is the unfaithful one go figure!

I always wear mine - haven't removed it for 32 years. Looking for an engagement ring to go with it some day. :)