Well, long story short...no friends. No family. I literally packed every single last boy thing and donated it to Goodwill. Kept all my girl clothes. Makeup. Have my first Drs appointment on April 11 as Kylie. Have the name change process going on. Can't wait for top and bottom surgery. BUT...I still keep wondering if I made the right decision? This was my first day. New town. Walked around. Went in to the gas station to get cigarettes and drinks. Sat at the park and read a book. I'm happier. I've always wanted to be a girl it's just a night and day difference and very hard for me to wrap my head around. Especially not having anyone to confide in.
Quote from: Kylie725 on April 03, 2025, 09:20:05 PMWell, long story short...no friends. No family. I literally packed every single last boy thing and donated it to Goodwill. Kept all my girl clothes. Makeup. Have my first Drs appointment on April 11 as Kylie. Have the name change process going on. Can't wait for top and bottom surgery. BUT...I still keep wondering if I made the right decision? This was my first day. New town. Walked around. Went in to the gas station to get cigarettes and drinks. Sat at the park and read a book. I'm happier. I've always wanted to be a girl it's just a night and day difference and very hard for me to wrap my head around. Especially not having anyone to confide in.
I get the confide issue as it's tough to make this journey alone. Talk to us here and don't be afraid to slow down if you have any worries. You can always speed up later. Best wishes!
Congrats on the doctor's appointment.
Being the new girl in town can seem a bit lonely at first. I have no doubt you will make friends soon. You have come so far already. I am very impressed with your bravery and commitment. Good for you!
We are here if you need us. Let us know how it's going, vent all you like, and we will still be here.
I am so proud of you!
Welcome Aboard Kylie,
This place is a wonderful sounding board!... a lot of good listeners and a wide variety of experiences to draw on... Congrats on your upcoming appointment! There are infinite ways to make life with dysphoria works so don't let anyone, including yourself, put you on a fast moving conveyor belt to full transition until you have deep sense that is your path... it is okay to let off life's gas pedal until you are sure of the destination you want... Therapist can be a great help in finding what you truly want to make your life the one you want... Let us know how your appointment goes!
I hope to see you blabbing a lot around here! All good things to you as you find your way forward!
Onward!
Ashley 💕🌻
Hi Kylie Hi Kylie,
I really appreciate you sharing your story. Walking into a gas station on your first day in a new town, just being yourself and putting yourself out there, it takes a lot of guts. I'm genuinely sorry to hear that you don't have friends or family to lean on at the moment. It's tough to navigate all this without support, but the fact that you are still pushing forward is something to truly be proud of.
I remember when I threw out my old clothes. I literally tossed all my clothes in the garbage bin, right in front of my best friend. I guess it felt liberating, but that was quite a while ago. But I never looked back.
It's awesome to hear you have got your first doctor's appointment lined up and that you are starting the process to change your name. When I changed my life around, I changed my most important document right away and then tackled the rest over time. I've never had issues because of it. Getting that legal recognition sorted out early really helps make everything else easier.
About those feelings of doubt only you can truly know if this is the right path for you. But if this makes you happier, that speaks volumes. You mentioned feeling like you are in a completely different place now and I can relate. All I did was change my clothes and then got back to work within three months. The rest? Well, the rest they say is "history".
When it comes to surgery, I would suggest taking your time with top surgery. Hormones often take three to five years to fully work in terms of breast development. It might make sense to focus on saving for bottom surgery first, then re-evaluate later. If, after a few years, you are still not happy with how your breasts look, top surgery will always be there as an option. Just give your body the time it needs to adjust.
You have made a brave leap and it sounds like this has been on your mind for a long time. Keep moving at your own pace and don't hesitate to reach out here at Susan's anytime you need. You are not alone in this anymore.
Take care and all the best for the future.
Best Wishes AlwaysSarah BGlobal Moderator@Kylie725
Hi Kylie725,
Welcome to Susan's! 💗
~ Lilis
Welcome, Kylie!! And thank you for sharing your story. Taking those first steps can be emotionally exhausting and scary. You've done it, though!! Congrats!!
I would echo the idea of taking your time and, if possible, in working with a gender therapist. A therapist can help answer the questions that swirl around our heads early on and can also help you determine how and when to move ahead with the different aspects of transition. I'm 2 years into my journey and still trying to figure out exactly what transition will end up looking like.
In any case, we're here to help!!
Quote from: Kylie725 on April 03, 2025, 09:20:05 PMWell, long story short...no friends. No family. I literally packed every single last boy thing and donated it to Goodwill. Kept all my girl clothes. Makeup. Have my first Drs appointment on April 11 as Kylie. Have the name change process going on. Can't wait for top and bottom surgery. BUT...I still keep wondering if I made the right decision? This was my first day. New town. Walked around. Went in to the gas station to get cigarettes and drinks. Sat at the park and read a book. I'm happier. I've always wanted to be a girl it's just a night and day difference and very hard for me to wrap my head around. Especially not having anyone to confide in.
You are wrong about something, Kylie. You do have friends and family. Admittedly not the ones you might think. But nonetheless, you have people you can confide in, okay?
We can't be there in person but we are all there in spirit. Wishing you the best and saying you go, girl!
Not gonna lie, the only Kylie I know is... well, the most famous Kylie...
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/26/c3/90/26c3907f907d58d248f117d9467b760c.jpg)
So that's the image I have of you in my head. ;)
Congratulations Kylie. Sounds like you took a step into the deep end of the pool. Doubt is normal and a good thing. It keeps us from making bad decisions. Just because you are transitioning doesn't mean you have to leave your friends and family behind. I have many friends who support me in my journey and family who knew how miserable as a man I was and how happy I am now.
Many areas have trans support groups that can be a great source of new friends as well as a great support network. I suggest looking one up in your area. The one I go to has a huge wealth of information for every area of transitioning as well as financial assistance. You are not alone in this journey, we are all in it together and here for you.
Gina
Welcome
@Kylie725 (love your name)
Alana