I thought this might be of interest.
http://www.proudparenting.com/page.cfm?sectionid=77&typeofsite=storydetail&ID=800&storyset=yes
As the wife of a crossdresser I am concerned about what to tell the children, when, how, at what age. This is not about people who transitioning, but rather about crossdressers who want to do the right thing for their kids. At the same time, they do not want the crossdressing to be public information.
Leigh,
That was a really good article. Thank you.
This has been somthing I have been trying to think through for after I eventually come out to my spouse. It doesn't take much imagination to hear her say / demand that I not present as female around the kids until they are of legal age.
Chaunte
http://www.transparentcy.org/
This site is run by a friend of mine. I do not know it anything here is applicable.
Quote from: Leigh on March 13, 2006, 08:57:15 PM
http://www.transparentcy.org/
This site is run by a friend of mine. I do not know it anything here is applicable.
It absolutely is applicable. This is a treasuretrove of information.
When I first started my journey of self-discovery, I contacted several law firms to better understand my rights. I found a lawfirm in Ithaca, NY, that specializes in GLBT issues. This includes parental rights for transgendered parents. I hope that I don't need their services. However, its nice to know that they are there.
Here in Western & Central New York, judges tend to be rather conservative.
This story happened about 10 to 15 years ago, and I don't know how much things have changed... A girlfriend of mine became the court-appointed supervisor for a MTF transexual father. The meeting occurred at a court-approved, public location. The kids and parent were not allowed to leave the location together. They could not be left alone at any time whatsoever. All they has was a couple hours every other week. It was restricted simply because of the parent's ->-bleeped-<-.
I started to write this and the tears just started to flow...
I could rebuild my life as a single individual if it comes to that, but I will not lose access to my children.
Chaunte
You will find a strong conservative base going from Utica to the state line. Of all the cities here in Upstate, Rochester is probably the most liberal. Even so, the story I passed on in my last post here happened in Rochester.
Chaunte
http://www.cauldronfarm.com/writing/tgparent.html
Quote from: Leigh on March 15, 2006, 12:23:38 AM
http://www.cauldronfarm.com/writing/tgparent.html
Ok, that was absolutely wonderful. I've seen more than one parental unit who needs to read that... twice, if not more.
Thank you Leigh!
These sites are all very interesting and have a lot of good information. However much of the discussion on these sites is directed towards transexuals and gays. I understand that those who must come out in public as TS have to deal with the issue of their children. In a sense they have no choice once they have decided to transition.
The situation for us crossdressers is a little different. If we have young children living with us the issue is whether to tell them or to keep it hidden. I have three children (now all grown and moved out on their own). When they were young I never crossdressed when they were in the house and as far as I know they do not know about this aspect of my life even now. (If they do know they haven't said anything to me.) Even though they are now adults and are very accepting of different lifestyles my wife is very opposed to telling them about my crossdressing. In deference to her I will not tell the kids.
I can reply with a benefit of personal experience. Been there done that.
Back in 1991 I sued my wife for divorce and also sued for custody of my daughter who was 4 at the time.
Long story short ... my daughter and I won in the very conservative bible belt of the south.
The wife at the time attempted to make issue of my cross dressing as an attempt to cover up her own behavior while I had been away in a war zone. Her behavior was illegal and psychotic.
I never dressed in front of my daughter and the courts frantically searched for any occurence. My first responsibility has always been to my daughter.
Now that my daughter is 19 of legal age and going to college, I am free to cross dress and enjoy my fem heart.
Soon will be getting a makeover and photo shoot.
Kids are the priority and come first. I dont want to sound paranoid but the gestapo moralists are always looking for a way to control lives. Let your kids grow and develop into who they are and save the woman inside you for the day we can blossom.
It has been a long time and Katie is coming out.
Take Care, Katie