Good evening guys and dolls.
Tonight's topic: TG on TG Dating
Would you or have you dated a fellow transgender?
I can see a few pros and cons here.
It would be nice to be with somebody who's been through the same process or is in some way gender variant and thus 'gets' you.
On the other hand - seems like an awful lot of baggage with TWO transgender peeps under one roof.
Also - as transgendered people...
Isn't what we really want to just be free of and past all the gender issues? And thus maybe a cisgender person might make a better match?
Or not?
All I know is that you ladies keep tormenting me with pics of your beautiful selves and you're REALLY making me think long and hard about this.
I have dated a MtF. I would not date another Transgender person again because there was too much emotional stress, and it eventually tore us apart. Two MtF's trying to cope with the wrong body, while trying to have a romantic relationship? Pre-op? Yea, anyways~ Too hard on every aspect of the relationship. Additionally, it turns out she wanted a guy. Go figure.
I'm just a girl who loves a guy, and yes, we both have a transsexual history. Does that make a difference? No! Should it? I don't think so. We are just as any other cisgendered couple. We both have dated and been in long time relationships with cisgendered people in the past; I have been with biological men, and he has been with genetic girls.
QuoteIsn't what we really want to just be free of and past all the gender issues? And thus maybe a cisgender person might make a better match?
No, a cisgendered person wouldn't be a better match. A best match is someone whom you love and loves you regardless of your past, history, and whatever else there is. A best match is someone whom you respect and respects you in return; a best match is someone you consider your love, your companion, your best friend, your shoulder to cry on, your strength, your lover and vice versa. We don't talk about gender issues as some people on this board would think. There are more fun things to do in life. We don't even talk about our transsexual histories, except on very few occasions. What we were (to whatever degree that was) is NOT important. What we ARE NOW is. Indeed, the only time that we are reminded that we were not born cisgendered is when we are here.
tink :icon_chick:
For a long time i would have said, not a chance.... too much emontinal baggage etc, but also for a long time i would have said i would never date a guy. Now it's just depends on the person, if they are a person i click with and are relatively stable .. sure i would give it a go. if not, i wouldn't, regardless of gender.
I have dated transgendered people in the past and I will say for many there is a good chance of chemistry, if TG people can get over the whole concept of "we're getting together because of our disorders" which it really isn't about. I find many of us wind up sharing many more hobbies and interests, and there's always that mutual undercurrent of not just acceptance, but rather that TG is a non-issue, assuming you get together with someone who's emotionally stable enough within themselves. Presumably a fair amount of us still do go see a therapist and work out all our issues (not just the GID issues) which for me of the ones that I have dated, they have had very good heads on their shoulders.
Basically, there's a common thread there where you can develop a friendship that can turn into very deep love. I have never fallen into an infatuation or otherwise with another TG, more so that I grew to care for their well-being to the point where they became someone I was dating by "default." This goes for pretty much anyone else I have dated, cisgendered or otherwise.
I already challenge society's concept of gender by existing, so why should I rule out someone else for doing the same?
-Kit
Quote from: Kiera on March 01, 2008, 06:03:45 PM
Quote from: Nero on March 01, 2008, 04:36:02 PMTonight's topic: TG on TG Dating
Have you? would you?
I have not!
Would you, could you,
on a boat?
I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, with a goat.
I will not meet them in the rain.
I will not meet them on a train.
Not in the dark! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! You let me be!
I do not like them in a box.
I do not like them with a fox.
I will not meet them in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.
I do not like them ANYWHERE!
So Let Us Be! LOL :icon_bunch:
Now, when Sassy Lasses balk,
it's called a Sassy Lassy Battle.
And when they battle in a puddle,
it's a Sassy Lassy Puddle Battle.
AND when Sassy Lasses battle with paddles in a puddle,
they call it a Sassy Lassy Puddle Paddle Battle.
AND when Lasses battle Lasses in a Puddle Paddle Battle,
and the Lassy battle's puddle is a puddle in a bottle,
they call this a Sassy Lassy Bottle Puddle Paddle Battle Muddle.
AND when Lasses balk these battles in a bottle with their paddles,
and the bottle's on a poodle, and the poodle's eating noodles,
they call this a Muddle Puddle Sassy Poodle Lassy Noodle Bottle Paddle Battle. AND--
Now wait a minute, Ms. Kiera...
Don't knock it 'til you tried it was the moral of that Dr. Seuss book. :)
-Kit
Quote from: kirakero on March 01, 2008, 04:39:29 PM
I have dated a MtF. I would not date another Transgender person again because there was too much emotional stress, and it eventually tore us apart. Two MtF's trying to cope with the wrong body, while trying to have a romantic relationship? Pre-op? Yea, anyways~ Too hard on every aspect of the relationship. Additionally, it turns out she wanted a guy. Go figure.
Hmmm... That last part sounds like the real problem. ;)
As to emotional issues and coping -- definitely a case-by-case kind of issue. I wouldn't want to paint with too broad of a brush.
been there, done that. too much drama. not ever again. thank you very much.
I haven't, but I would. It would depend on the person, of course.
I think it sure would be nice to be with someone who doesn't make the occasional snarky remark about me. Not that I hear a lot of it anyway, but even a little is too much.
yes. It does. Now I'm going to cry :'(
:laugh:
Sure, I'd date someone who was TG, I don't care what gender my partner is, as long as everything else clicks with us. ;D
Z
no need to cry, it wasn't a snark it was a boojum you see.
...
As much as I'd be prepared to date anyone I would. I wouldn't mind a female bodied androgyne to be all female bodied and androgyne-y with me
Deary, both of my partners are TS, and I love them just the way they are. And I will continue to love them after we have all had GRS.
I know that I would like to date another TG person. I believe if it is done for the right reasons and the people involved are open and honest with each other about what's going on with them then it can be very successful relationship, just like any other so called normal relationship between two people who care about each other. I agree with Tink it shouldn't matter whether someone is TG or not.
Hugz,
Ariana
Quote from: Lisbeth on March 01, 2008, 08:48:22 PM
Deary, both of my partners are TS, and I love them just the way they are. And I will continue to love them after we have all had GRS.
You're not insinuating that you're all going to be joined at the hip, are you? ;)
Posted on: March 01, 2008, 08:51:23 PM
Quote from: Ariana on March 01, 2008, 08:50:09 PM
I agree with Tink it shouldn't matter whether someone is TG or not.
Hugz,
Ariana
You made me think.
I have come to realize that some TS people are not interested in other TS's. At first, I thought this was a possibly mean thing of them to say, however, I've come to believe that it comes down to simple sexual orientation. Some people are only wired to be attracted to people who are cisgendered. Just as a gay man would only be interested in a male or a straight person would only be interested in someone of the opposite sex.
I wrote this because it occurred to me that, as a person, who doesn't really care about what the other person is, I used to feel that others were being bigoted when they said they do care what the other person's body is or was. But, they are NOT bigoted. They just have a particular orientation.
Since I had this epiphany, I expect a cookie. :-*
Posted on: March 01, 2008, 09:00:06 PM
Quote from: Pica Pica on March 01, 2008, 08:45:53 PM
no need to cry, it wasn't a snark it was a boojum you see.
...
As much as I'd be prepared to date anyone I would. I wouldn't mind a female bodied androgyne to be all female bodied and androgyne-y with me
There are some androgyne or gender variant women who partially transition taking Hormones, maybe even getting breast removals.
When you say 'female bodied', are you excluding these women?
Just curious. Not judging
yeah. Unless we had fun of course and got on and things.
I like the female shape. If we are talking holding hands, then I am talking female-shaped.
If we are just talking dinner and a nice chat - bring the world on.
Oh. I've been reading about all these fabulous and intelligent women who transition right up to the edge of becoming male. I find them very attractive.
I understand about your desire for a conventional looking woman, though. That's what my earlier post was about.
I guess I should now ask; what about an MtF who has completed transition and then identified as androgyne?
gray area
doesn't really matter though - I do not have the time money or inclination to date anybody.
how about if a rich androgyne turned up to woo you?
then you wouldn't need money.
then it would be a struggle, the real me would say 'go for it, it'll be fun' whilst the pretend super-ego-type me would go, 'no, we must think about the future' and the real me would win. Every time.
I'm telling your super-ego you said that. >:D
super-egos don't like to lose
Let me just say one thing: In the past, I thought I could only be attracted to cisgendered men; of course, that was proven to be false. These previous posts speak for themselves:
Quote from: Tinkerbell on August 18, 2006, 11:06:46 PM
I wish I coud say "yes" but I would be lying if I did. I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but this is how I am and how I feel. I've thought a lot about this, but my answer remains the same...I would never date a FTM, that's just me, only me, and not a Tinkerbell's law or anything of that sort. :)
tinkerbell :icon_chick:
And then the evolution begins....
Quote from: Tink on April 06, 2007, 10:33:03 PM
Nevertheless, dating, IMO, does not mean having sex or sleeping with whomever you are going out. So having said that, sure, I'd date a FTM for the reasons I have stated; however, I am not sure whether I could have anything sexual with that person. Why? not because of his genitals, but mainly because I wouldn't know how to please him sexually. That's the most honest response I can give, I think. I hope I haven't offended anyone and if I have, I apologize. :)
tink :icon_chick:
and my feelings transform even more....
Quote from: Tink on May 16, 2007, 08:20:23 PM
Hmmmmm another interesting thread indeed. Well, I am only attracted to men, and I am attracted to the appearance of the male form, body, secondary sex characteristics (i.e, voice, facial hair, muscle tone, demeanor, posture), etc. I have only been intimate with biological men, so their genitalia and characteristics (listed above) have always gone together. However, I must say that, in my case, genitals are not important either. On another thread, I said that I can easily be attracted to female to male transsexuals; it is their masculine appearance (chemically altered by testosterone) that I am attracted to, not their genitalia. As far as intimacy is concerned, well I think that love making does find its ways, especially if a couple has plenty of imagination, so personally, I don't consider it a problem either. ;D >:D
tink :icon_chick:
Now, one is attracted to what one is attracted to, and IMO nothing can change sexual orientation. I consider sexual orientation to be innate and inalterable. I'm attracted to men (biological or FTM's), BUT (there's always a but, isn't there?), I have my exceptions as well; I could never be with a FTM who looked like a female since I am not attracted to the female form in the least. In order for me to be attracted to a FTM, this person must:
Quote from: Tink on February 27, 2008, 09:50:40 PM
I feel I need to add this though. Genitals are not important to me but if the person I am with is a FTM, he must pass as a male 100% (meaning that he needs to be on testosterone, have a male chest + male secondary sexual characteristics as voice, hair, etc....the bottom part is NOT an issue for me.
;D ;)
tink :icon_chick:
This has nothing to do with bigotry or prejudiced views but with my sexual orientation (heterosexual). It simply is and I can't change what I'm attracted to.
tink :icon_chick:
P.S. time for dinner now! :P
Quote from: Rebis on March 01, 2008, 09:15:18 PM
how about if a rich androgyne turned up to woo you?
then you wouldn't need money.
If a rich androgyne who lives in Canada shows up, and would marry both my partner and I, that could work ;) ;D
Z
Perhaps the partner in my case would either reveal what shape my puzzle piece is, or at least make it a certain shape. I don't even know what I want anymore, and I suspect I'd fall for anything that hit the right places in me. I mean...
This is why I could be classified as, "Possibly Bi" cause I have no clue now. I don't think I'd mind being with an FtM if they were the right person. I honestly don't know about MtF, but usually when I feel attracted to something like that, its me wishing to be them (some are outright beautiful, and I envy them even though they aren't done transitioning yet. Not that the incomplete transition isn't beautiful, I'm just going from a slightly practical standpoint if one were to engage in something besides backdoor sexual activity) versus wanting to be with them.
There's just too many complexes in me at this point.
Part of me is really connecting with someone I know who is either not identifying with a gender, or fully thinks they are male. Although... They did once tell me they had no gender after a laugh, so who knows. Maybe that was some kind of a defeated statement or one of frustration... Mixed with In Vino Veritas. Frustration perhaps at knowing what the path of transitioning really had along the way.
Either way I don't care, and unfortunately I can't go out with them. Why you may ask? Well first... I don't know if its love I feel. I suspect it is, cause I'll miss them when they're in college, and instantly feel better about my situation when they return. I feel like we connect on a lot of levels, and she's like the optimist in it all, so its always fun or interesting.
I mean... Even if It were love, "she" was recently in a relationship which tore apart horribly, and I wouldn't want to do that to the guy she was going out with. Nor to her. Neither of us are completely stable people from what I gather, and unless we can both lean on each other perfectly, I have no faith in it. And like I mention, I'm friends with the guy she went out with. She doesn't know completely about how transgendered I am, and I have no idea what they're even comfortable with. Not to mention how uncomfortable I feel sexually a lot of the time.
But... Maybe if the situation were different by a little, I'd try. I could definitely imagine it. I mean... This coming from someone who has hated love before, and disconnected from it cause of past heartbreak. It would definitely be something unconventional enough. I mean... What matters to me besides physical attraction, is DEFINITELY that wavelength thats shared somewhat, and being a best friend who's there.
But I don't really care either way. I'm here to be a really good friend. Maybe like a younger sibling (wtf... They're OLDER THAN ME!). As long as I can communicate at least on that same channel with something else besides myself, It keeps me sane and hopeful. *sigh... Its a pity I didn't tell anyone else even slightly besides her and a couple others about the TIP of my issues. I wouldn't always feel like that lonely dog sitting on the hick porch waiting for the master to get back from the real world, to bring news to this suburban wasteland with no one to talk to.
Answer: I would, I think.
Quote from: Tink on March 01, 2008, 09:35:00 PM
Let me just say one thing: In the past, I thought I could only be attracted to cisgendered men; of course, that was proven to be false. ...
[Content was removed in order to shorten this response] - rebis
This has nothing to do with bigotry or prejudiced views but with my sexual orientation (heterosexual). It simply is and I can't change what I'm attracted to.
tink :icon_chick:
P.S. time for dinner now! :P
Right. I remember when you said those first statements, then I was surprised to see you change. I agree. It has nothing to do with bigotry, just sexual orientation.
By the way, I'm happy at how it turned out for you. :)
Rebis
Dated both and played, (FtF. FtM) several times. Like anything else, some of it was good, other parts boring.
No I could never date a TG person. I've got more than enough with my gender issues.
You can be attracted to someone for various reasons no matter what their sexual orientation or gender....
Quote from: Kiera on March 02, 2008, 08:42:48 AM
You do not like them.
So where does one find
these people called TG? ;D
Some are red. And some are blue.
Some are old. And some are new.
Some are sad. And some are glad.
And some are very, very bad.
They may live near our house.
They will grow and grow.
Will our mother like them?
We don't know.
And now good night.
It is time to sleep.
So we will sleep
with our black sheep.
Today is gone. Today was fun.
Tomorrow is another one.
Every day, from here to there,
TGs are everywhere :)
Quote from: Nero on March 02, 2008, 10:58:03 AM
And that's why I'm in the position I'm in now. Ruined and broken with not a friend alive.
That was then. This is now. You have friends, you just can't see or touch us. Maybe things will change for you where you are. Life is anything but static.
Love,
Rebis
To me it is purely an individual thing. In general I think most people mid transition shouldn't be dating ANYBODY - it is simply too much to load on another person, and anyway, you are spending so much time and energylearning about and learning to love yourself that I think it's a tall order to be able to keep up your end of a relationship on top of that. So att the moment I am on principle not dating anybody because I simply cannot give as much as I would end up taking, but in future, who knows? At the end of the day, it doesn't really matter what vessel the spirit comes in, as long as the spirit is a match to mine.
Perhaps, but not an MtF. I am just not attracted to women, tried that in high school. Yea ACKWARD. I can't make a blanket statement about FtMs. If I was attracted to them (the individual) then yeah I wouldn't have a problem with it. Its more about their personality than anything.
Audrey
I wouldn't date anybody. The main reason being that I'm asexual.
Quote from: Rebis on March 01, 2008, 09:03:29 PM
Quote from: Lisbeth on March 01, 2008, 08:48:22 PM
Deary, both of my partners are TS, and I love them just the way they are. And I will continue to love them after we have all had GRS.
You're not insinuating that you're all going to be joined at the hip, are you? ;)
Joined at the hip? Heck no. We each need our own space. But we will sandwich together sometimes.
What matters to me is not the gender but the individual person, if the right feeling just clicks between us, that's all I care about. Cis- or trans-, I make no distinction. Either is fine.
Being bisexual, I would be happy with either a man or a woman TS. With the emphasis on "man" and "woman." I'm probably not "pansexual" and the idea of dating androgynes doesn't exactly grab me. But then one never knows until something happens...
I have been sort-of-dating an FTM gentleman for a year and a half. Our first date was the evening of the first day we met, we immediately liked each other and decided to go out together right away. But we're just friends. I'm married and am not available for real dating. So I joined him for practice dating. He wanted to practice gentlemanly behavior to woo the ladies. He saw me as a real lady so I let him do all the old-fashioned stuff with me: holding doors, helping me off with my coat, and the works. He never let me open the car door by myself. If I forgot and opened it before he could get there, he was despondent. Such a sweetie. I was charmed by his sincerity and earnest desire to be chivalrous. He was such a gentleman, even though he crushed on me at first sight, he never pulled any hanky panky. Our dates were all G-rated.
I liked him so much, about a year after we met, I started to feel a little sweet on him myself. But by then his attitude had changed. He called attention to the difference in our ages (I'm about 15 years older though I don't look it), and said he could never be paired with a woman so much older than him. I was crestfallen, though we're still friends and still go out. I've always been there for him when other women didn't work out for him. He was so ga-ga for me at first, I was sorry to drop in his estimation of hotness. But this happened after he'd been shooting T for months, and maybe that was why he developed more conventional male attitudes, like wanting to date younger chicks. It was a good thing we've been just good friends all along, so we didn't need to break up. Because we were never a real item to begin with. Know what I mean?
Quote from: Hypatia on March 02, 2008, 05:56:11 PM
What matters to me is not the gender but the individual person, if the right feeling just clicks between us, that's all I care about. Cis- or trans-, I make no distinction. Either is fine.
Being bisexual, I would be happy with either a man or a woman TS. With the emphasis on "man" and "woman." I'm probably not "pansexual" and the idea of dating androgynes doesn't exactly grab me. But then one never knows until something happens...
I have been sort-of-dating an FTM gentleman for a year and a half. Our first date was the evening of the first day we met, we immediately liked each other and decided to go out together right away. But we're just friends. I'm married and am not available for real dating. So I joined him for practice dating. He wanted to practice gentlemanly behavior to woo the ladies. He saw me as a real lady so I let him do all the old-fashioned stuff with me: holding doors, helping me off with my coat, and the works. He never let me open the car door by myself. If I forgot and opened it before he could get there, he was despondent. Such a sweetie. I was charmed by his sincerity and earnest desire to be chivalrous. He was such a gentleman, even though he crushed on me at first sight, he never pulled any hanky panky. Our dates were all G-rated.
I liked him so much, about a year after we met, I started to feel a little sweet on him myself. But by then his attitude had changed. He called attention to the difference in our ages (I'm about 15 years older though I don't look it), and said he could never be paired with a woman so much older than him. I was crestfallen, though we're still friends and still go out. I've always been there for him when other women didn't work out for him. He was so ga-ga for me at first, I was sorry to drop in his estimation of hotness. But this happened after he'd been shooting T for months, and maybe that was why he developed more conventional male attitudes, like wanting to date younger chicks. It was a good thing we've been just good friends all along, so we didn't need to break up. Because we were never a real item to begin with. Know what I mean?
Hmm Well, I'm into older women as well as younger women. More mature women know who they are and what they want, and that's sexy. I may look at a cute young schoolgirl, but for a relationship I want a WOMAN.
Nero-- how you doin? ;)
Quote from: Rebis on March 01, 2008, 09:53:36 PM
Right. I remember when you said those first statements, then I was surprised to see you change. I agree. It has nothing to do with bigotry, just sexual orientation.
Rebis
People evolve :) But I don't think I have "changed". I've always been attracted to men, and the relationship I am in now is no different from the previous ones I've had. I guess that the only thing I needed to understand was that men are men, and that a penis doesn't make anyone a man.
Quote from: Rebis on March 01, 2008, 09:53:36 PM
By the way, I'm happy at how it turned out for you. :)
Thank you very much Becka :) (I hope you don't mind that I call you Becka, for that is how I used to call you before you changed your screen name). I've always said that love is like the rain, it happens unexpectedly, without warning. When you meet the right person, nothing else matters. Love conquers everything (they say), and I believe it's true....the rest are just mere details... ;)
tink :icon_chick:
Have I or would I date a TS or Transgender person?
Yes, of course I would.
I most certainly would.
Sara
I would be open to dating an FtM. Everyone should have the chance to find someone to love.
Quote from: Tink on March 01, 2008, 04:50:49 PM
I'm just a girl who loves a guy, and yes, we both have a transsexual history. Does that make a difference? No! Should it? I don't think so. We are just as any other cisgendered couple. We both have dated and been in long time relationships with cisgendered people in the past; I have been with biological men, and he has been with genetic girls.
QuoteIsn't what we really want to just be free of and past all the gender issues? And thus maybe a cisgender person might make a better match?
No, a cisgendered person wouldn't be a better match. A best match is someone whom you love and loves you regardless of your past, history, and whatever else there is. A best match is someone whom you respect and respects you in return; a best match is someone you consider your love, your companion, your best friend, your shoulder to cry on, your strength, your lover and vice versa. We don't talk about gender issues as some people on this board would think. There are more fun things to do in life. We don't even talk about our transsexual histories, except on very few occasions. What we were (to whatever degree that was) is NOT important. What we ARE NOW is. Indeed, the only time that we are reminded that we were not born cisgendered is when we are here.
tink :icon_chick:
what Tink said heh heh heh ;) :) :) :)
Quote from: Nero on March 01, 2008, 04:36:02 PM
maybe a cisgender person might make a better match?
dunno bro. why do u think a cisgender person is a beter match dude?
when I was with gg's. they were nice to me & stuff. they said they were in luv with me. but that was bullsh#t. when I told them I was trans. they threw me out like a pc of crap b/c I didnt got what they wanted. they didnt love me. they wanted a bio dude not me.
I got hurt a lot but everythin's cool now. u just gotta find the right person. somebody that luvs u not what u got down there. :) :) :)
Quote from: Chris on March 03, 2008, 03:26:13 AM
...
...
when I was with gg's. they were nice to me & stuff. they said they were in luv with me. but that was bullsh#t. when I told them I was trans. they threw me out like a pc of crap b/c I didnt got what they wanted. they didnt love me. they wanted a bio dude not me.
I got hurt a lot but everythin's cool now. u just gotta find the right person. somebody that luvs u not what u got down there. :) :) :)
There are genetic females and males that can appreciate the transgender body. There are a surprising number of them out there. It would be however more difficult for a straight TG to find someone accepting versus a lesbian/gay TG person. There are a few factors~ One: People want kids (depending, this may not be true in some situations). Two: People become accustomed to sex one way, the "right way" according to society, and see the other way as perhaps lesbian/gay sex. Three: They are not open-minded by default. Four: They don't want to be marked as 'queer' if other people learn about you. Five: They don't understand ->-bleeped-<-... And don't want to. If they wanted to understand TG people... Love would hold better.
From my situation, when I look for girls, I right from the bat describe myself as a transgender lesbian. I get my fair share of people ignoring me, but I definitely do get those that are interested. I feel like there is more openness when it comes to dating lesbians... And there is. We both had to come to terms with ourselves, and had to come out to some degree. Of course, there are those lesbians that steadfastly REFUSE to date transgender girls. But lets not get into that.
Things really just boil down to who has an open mind, like so many other things.
Myself so far I've only dated non-trans men but I'd love to date a F2M sometime.
My problem would be that I'm 5'11" so I regularly date tall guys; but a shorter guy with a ton of confidence, who's his own man and who's not intimidated by a taller woman?
Sexyyyy... ;)
Back to composure now :angel:
i don;t know.i am mtf and i am str8(attracted to men).
if someone ftm meets my standards and i meet his then ok?:)
btw i have seen a couple of real attractive men in this site:)
moreover sex is not important to me.and now since my genitals are not the way they should, i would appreciate someone who would understand my discomfort.
after grs tg or not, i have no problem or preference.
But he has to be masculine.(and no breast:))
Quote......but he has to be masculine.(and no breast:))
Amen to that. I went on a blind date a few months ago with a guy that had bigger boobs than I do. Major turnoff. Not to mention he was weird, really weird.
Audrey
Quote from: Audrey on March 03, 2008, 01:19:51 PM
Not to mention he was weird, really weird.
hehe ... 46, lives with his mom and works in a comic shop?
OMG. No but close. 37 and lived with.......here it is GRANDMA in her basement. Now don't get me wrong that would be fine if he was like helping take care of her or something like that, but that wasn't the case. And plus he was just, well, like weird.
Audrey
Damn! The psychic stuff is harder than I thought...
:icon_hover-alien:
I'm trying to veer away from the "Lives with their mom and reads comics road" so I can be on the, "Makes comics and threatens nursing home on mom" pathway. (I love her, but lets be honest... A good prank for all those years of nonsense would be great.)
... I really need to find someone don't I? Someone OUTSIDE of the rat race.
Quote from: deviousxen on March 03, 2008, 02:44:08 PM
... I really need to find someone don't I? Someone OUTSIDE of the rat race.
Definitely agree with that myself, perhaps even to find someone trying very hard to get out. Good luck to you!
I hear there's some available TGs in this thread. Wooo! :-*
I could certainly date someone who is TG, especially a certain really cute andro. ;D
Goodness, NO!!
Okay, now that the shock has worn off: I'm already in a very committed relationship.
Nichole
I probably would date a TG. Basically I'm a little inexperience in the relation department and not even sure what I'm looking for.
Anna
Quote from: Nichole on March 03, 2008, 04:21:54 PM
Goodness, NO!!
Okay, now that the shock has worn off: I'm already in a very committed relationship.
Nichole
got something against cute andros???
I like men....
If i happen to meet a transguy who fits all my dating criteria: 6ft plus, Broad shouldered, deep voice, built, sensative, kind, tough, and dominant...
Sure, id date him, same as any guy....
But unlike some, im not going out of my way to find a transguy....
In preferance i probably wouldnt.... 2x Trans = a heap of agro that is bad enough when one in the relationship has it... :P
R >:D
Quote from: Nero on March 01, 2008, 04:36:02 PM
Good evening guys and dolls.
Tonight's topic: TG on TG Dating
Would you or have you dated a fellow transgender?
I can see a few pros and cons here.
It would be nice to be with somebody who's been through the same process or is in some way gender variant and thus 'gets' you.
On the other hand - seems like an awful lot of baggage with TWO transgender peeps under one roof.
Also - as transgendered people...
Isn't what we really want to just be free of and past all the gender issues? And thus maybe a cisgender person might make a better match?
Or not?
All I know is that you ladies keep tormenting me with pics of your beautiful selves and you're REALLY making me think long and hard about this.
TWO, who said anything about two? ;)
I have, will, and am dating two other transgendered individuals :)
Quote from: Pica Pica on March 03, 2008, 06:29:02 PM
got something against cute andros???
How could anyone have something against cute andros?? ;) 8)
Z
why pica? have you seen any?
R >:D
Quote from: Pica Pica on March 03, 2008, 06:29:02 PM
Quote from: Nichole on March 03, 2008, 04:21:54 PM
Goodness, NO!!
Okay, now that the shock has worn off: I'm already in a very committed relationship.
Nichole
got something against cute andros???
No, Pica, not against cute ones at all.
I have something against playing around on my partner.
Nichole
even if we get your partner drunk and get her to agree in writing?
>:D
Quote from: Rebis on March 03, 2008, 08:05:34 PM
even if we get your partner drunk and get her to agree in writing?
>:D
Ummm, sure Rebis. Then I will.
Of course, good luck getting either of us drunk. I cannot recall either of us having more than one margarita or one glass of wine on any evening we've been living together. I believe there was one night four years ago when we were first dating that we sat on my back porch, or was it her balcony, and consumed a pitcher of margaritas.
I think we were both a little tipsy that night. But 'drunk?' Not so much.
Nichole
Quote from: Rachael on March 03, 2008, 06:33:52 PM
I like men....
If i happen to meet a transguy who fits all my dating criteria: 6ft plus, Broad shouldered, deep voice, built, sensative, kind, tough, and dominant...
Sure, id date him, same as any guy....
But unlike some, im not going out of my way to find a transguy....
In preferance i probably wouldnt.... 2x Trans = a heap of agro that is bad enough when one in the relationship has it... :P
R >:D
Is that dating criteria all around, as in you aren't be harder on transguys than genetic ones? Just my one random question in this tread haha. And also, I still can't see the real use of holding people to like height when it comes down to dating someone. What if you met someone (trans or genetic) that was pretty bomb and met most of your criteria who you hit it off with who turned out to be like 5'7 or 5'8 or 5'9 lol? I just love hypothetic questions too much I know. Anyways was just curious.
Quote from: deniz on March 03, 2008, 12:29:01 PM
he has to be masculine.(and no breast:))
Quote from: Audrey on March 03, 2008, 01:19:51 PM
Quote......but he has to be masculine.(and no breast:))
Amen to that.
Audrey
I couldn't agree more with these statements. I'm THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN HAVE BREASTS IN A RELATIONSHIP! ;D :P
Quote from: Audrey on March 03, 2008, 01:19:51 PM
I went on a blind date a few months ago with a guy that had bigger boobs than I do.
Oh no!
tink :icon_chick:
Quote from: Pica Pica on March 03, 2008, 06:29:02 PM
Quote from: Nichole on March 03, 2008, 04:21:54 PM
Goodness, NO!!
Okay, now that the shock has worn off: I'm already in a very committed relationship.
Nichole
got something against cute andros???
I got nothing against
cute ones. ::)
Yeah Tink its true. I was thinking like "OMG are those things real" (he was way way overweight). Usually I think it is the other way around with people wondering if mine are. What a twist.
Audrey
Quote from: shanetastic on March 03, 2008, 08:18:50 PM
Quote from: Rachael on March 03, 2008, 06:33:52 PM
I like men....
If i happen to meet a transguy who fits all my dating criteria: 6ft plus, Broad shouldered, deep voice, built, sensative, kind, tough, and dominant...
Sure, id date him, same as any guy....
But unlike some, im not going out of my way to find a transguy....
In preferance i probably wouldnt.... 2x Trans = a heap of agro that is bad enough when one in the relationship has it... :P
R >:D
Is that dating criteria all around, as in you aren't be harder on transguys than genetic ones? Just my one random question in this tread haha. And also, I still can't see the real use of holding people to like height when it comes down to dating someone. What if you met someone (trans or genetic) that was pretty bomb and met most of your criteria who you hit it off with who turned out to be like 5'7 or 5'8 or 5'9 lol? I just love hypothetic questions too much I know. Anyways was just curious.
Nope, im equally hard on all guys, however thier born....
Tbh the hight thing is a big deal for me... im 5'9... its already tall, when youir 6ft in heels.... i want a guy that is equal to me in hight then or taller...
Its not a criteria... its a filter...
There is no way ill date a guy i have to bend down to kiss... or thats tiny... thats not how the girl meets guy thing works...
how the hell is he gonna sweet me off my feat if hes 5'5 and 100lbs?
R >:D
Hey girls, if you would not date yourself, who else will? Really, you are demanding from others that which you will not give yourself. Good luck on that one.
Quote from: Tink on March 03, 2008, 08:51:41 PM
I'm THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN HAVE BREASTS IN A RELATIONSHIP! ;D :P
tink :icon_chick:
lmao :laugh: yep & I want u to be the only one that got em :laugh:
Yeh, now you're thinking like Tom Waits --
If you want to insult me, you have try harder. I love TW. In the AbFab average and medoicore world of music, he is a god.
Rachael my buddy J.C. is a trans dude. he's 6'1. started T when he was 17. he's a big dude; goes to the gym every day. taller then me. I'm 5'6 - 5'7. more buffed then me :laugh: & he's lookin 4 a gf >:D
Nah, he is a local, I see him from time to time where I live and where I work. A real nice guy, true poet, great performer. Put it this way, I got paid +$600 to do a single Marylin Manson concert last week, and I think I was underpaid - should have made twice that much just because I had to listen to the whole show. TW I would work for free and be happy to do it.
K then. TW. Round 2.
Yeah, I date TG people
exclusively:
Quote from: Tom Waits
Oh yeah, you call yourself up too huh? Yeah, well one thing about it, your always around. Yeah I know, yeah you ask yourself out, you know, some class joint somewhere. .... Take yourself out for a couple of drinks maybe. Then there'd be some provocative conversation on the way home. ... Take myself up to the porch, take myself inside or maybe uh, or may get a little something, a brandy snifter or something. ... Well usually about 2.30 in the morning you've ended up taking advantage of yourself. There ain't no way around that you know. Yeah, making a scene with a magazine, there ain't no way around. I'll confess you know, I'm no different you know. I'm not weird about it or anything, I don't tie myself up first. I just kinda spend a little time with myself.
Quote from: Chris on March 04, 2008, 02:51:41 AM
Rachael my buddy J.C. is a trans dude. he's 6'1. started T when he was 17. he's a big dude; goes to the gym every day. taller then me. I'm 5'6 - 5'7. more buffed then me :laugh: & he's lookin 4 a gf >:D
If he was in the same country, id not say no ;)
Tekla: its not a matter of not dating ourselves... im not going to date a transwoman because im not a lesbian... Should i be homosexual because im trans? no.
R >:D
For all the bachelors out there tonight, yeah for anybody who's never whistled this song.
Maybe you whistled it but you lost the sheet music.
Um...this is um...well actually I don't mind going to weddings or anything, as long as there not my own I show up. But I've always kinda been partial to calling myself up on the phone and asking myself out, you know? Oh yeah, you call yourself up too huh? Yeah, well one thing about it, your always around. Yeah I know, yeah you ask yourself out, you know, some class joint somewhere. The Buretto King or something, you know. Well I ain't cheap you know. Take yourself out for a couple of drinks maybe. Then there'd be some provocative conversation on the way home. Park in front of the house you know. Oh yeah, you smoothly put a little nice music on, maybe you put on like uh, you know, like shopping music, something thats not too interruptive you know and then uh slide over real nice and say 'Oh I think you have something in your eye'. Well maybe it's not that romantic with you but Christ I don't know, you know I get into it you know. Take myself up to the porch, take myself inside or maybe uh, or may get a little something, a brandy snifter or something. 'Would like you like to listen to some of my back records? I got something here' Uh Well usually about 2.30 in the morning you've ended up taking advantage of yourself. There ain't no way around that you know. Yeah, making a scene with a magazine, there ain't no way around. I'll confess you know, I'm no different you know. I'm not weird about it or anything, I don't tie myself up first. I just kinda spend a little time with myself
So this is kind of a little anthem here.
thats the most long winded description of a guy playing the one armed bandit ever...
R >:D
Ah, but to hear him do that monolog is as close to pure poetry in motion as I've heard since old Allen did his last reading here. BTW, his wife/GF is a stone cold, drop dead fox. So I doubt if a real life story anymore.
um, sounds like a guy talking about masturbation.... not really poetic at all....
or remotely on topic.
R >:D
Point was, nobody should be dating anyone as screwed up as I am right now, and neither should I be dating anyone. So when tekla said "if you would not date yourself, who else will?" ... well, there are a few ways to creatively interpret that ... either way it's a valid point ... or something.
Now go download Nighthawks at the Diner. (No, not the painting.)
Quote from: Alyssa M. on March 04, 2008, 03:51:32 AM
Point was, nobody should be dating anyone as screwed up as I am right now, and neither should I be dating anyone.
Now that's a sentiment I can ABSOLUTELY relate with.
Tom Waits is absolutely awesome!!!!! What a writer!
And as I said earlier in this thread, I don't care what gender my partner is or isn't...
Z
Call me ficle... or selfish, but im a heterosexual girl. I want to date a guy. i want to marry a guy. end of story. I dont care how he started life, just a guy pls :D
R >:D
Quote from: lady amarant on March 04, 2008, 05:30:30 AM
Quote from: Alyssa M. on March 04, 2008, 03:51:32 AM
Point was, nobody should be dating anyone as screwed up as I am right now, and neither should I be dating anyone.
Now that's a sentiment I can ABSOLUTELY relate with.
Seconded. Like... I want to find someone ALMOST as screwed up, but an optimist.
Quote from: Rachael on March 03, 2008, 07:32:27 PM
why pica? have you seen any?
R >:D
everytime I look in the back of a spoon
Quote from: deviousxen on March 04, 2008, 09:19:33 AM
Quote from: lady amarant on March 04, 2008, 05:30:30 AM
Quote from: Alyssa M. on March 04, 2008, 03:51:32 AM
Point was, nobody should be dating anyone as screwed up as I am right now, and neither should I be dating anyone.
Now that's a sentiment I can ABSOLUTELY relate with.
Seconded. Like... I want to find someone ALMOST as screwed up, but an optimist.
hehe, see, someone almost as screwed up as me would be a disaster. And I
am an optimist. I'm only dating people with the patience of a saint who are openminded, bisexual, and strictly monogamous. And can play the viola da gamba.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi111.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fn125%2FBelladonna_06%2Fmeme%2FBayeauxISee.jpg&hash=d8909c89f8f0a7a3745667ebe65084622d8498d6)
R >:D
Quote from: Rachael on March 03, 2008, 06:33:52 PM
But unlike some, im not going out of my way to find a transguy....
In preferance i probably wouldnt.... 2x Trans = a heap of agro that is bad enough when one in the relationship has it... :P
Just for the record, the majority of cisgendered men that I've met that were interested in TG's have wound up being men of this variety:
http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=-4154434815024139884
Darth Kitty, you're killing me. *wiping screwdriver off monitor*
Well, I'm no longer in denial about my bisexuality and, thus, I think I could and would date someone TG, FtM or MtF, if I liked them enough and they weren't falling apart at the seams.
A transsexual is a person.
I don't know about you, but I date PEOPLE. That includes TRANSSEXUALS. Some of the male-to-females that I know, those tall and beautiful ones, make my half lesbo self wanna crawl in their lap and molest their lips w/ mine(I can't say).
Some of the FtMs have such amazing attitudes and insights that well, I could easily see myself getting caught in that kind of deep, passionate gaze, that sort of gaze that's gazed on a lot of things, that sort of gaze that evey FtM I've ever met has.
Then again, I don't restrict myself to, "bisexual" or, "homosexual" or, "heterosexual." I just like whatever looks good and whoever can make me feel fuzzy inside, no matter what age(legal), what gender, orientation, whatever. I'm honestly quite attracted to transsexuals, not because of being transsexual, but because I know that person has the capability to dream, more than anyone else, he/she dreams. Variety is the spice of life, yes?
Although lately, I've been getting horny again. It's not that kind of, "bend over and touch your toes," testosterone horny it's like, "cuddle kiss and nibble" horny. Weeeeiiird. I don't even really relate sex to it that much...
Quote from: Annwyn on March 06, 2008, 07:27:20 PM
Although lately, I've been getting horny again. It's not that kind of, "bend over and touch your toes," testosterone horny it's like, "cuddle kiss and nibble" horny. Weeeeiiird. I don't even really relate sex to it that much...
crazy. I'm the same and I'm not even on HRT or transitioning.
I tend to date people, not symptoms. I look for people who have tastes, activities, politics et. all. that are at least similar to mine. As long as they are upfront about who they are, I can deal with what they are.
what if they're G. Gordon Liddy?
Somehow I'm sure we don't share the same politics.
Quote from: tekla on March 04, 2008, 02:28:58 AM
Hey girls, if you would not date yourself, who else will? Really, you are demanding from others that which you will not give yourself. Good luck on that one.
Your logic astounds me! So I take it you date guys just like yourself?
And who's demanding? Everyone has a preference for certain attributes, whether it be gender, hair colour, race, religion, height, weight, blah, blah, blah! BUT it's not set in stone, as we all know, love conquers everything! But you gotta start somewhere!
Dating is not about politics, is it? ;)
Oh My God! I just thought, would anybody here date J. Edgar Hoover? If he was man enough to wear his dress publicly, I mean. 'cause I think that would make him a TG (even without the publicness - but dating tends to be a public thing)
In fact, the people I date are very much like me. They are physicaly active people, small 'd' democrats (granted its hard to find any other type here), educated, often in science or technology, and tend to do real things, not paper things. They like to dance, know how to party, yet know their limits, are well employed, and are working toward something. They read, don't watch TV, and eat well.
And dating is very political, at the very least, keeping up a debate about politics is not very romantic.
Quote from: tekla on March 06, 2008, 08:03:04 PM
In fact, the people I date are very much like me. They are physicaly active people, small 'd' democrats (granted its hard to find any other type here), educated, often in science or technology, and tend to do real things, not paper things. They like to dance, know how to party, yet know their limits, are well employed, and are working toward something. They read, don't watch TV, and eat well.
And dating is very political, at the very least, keeping up a debate about politics is not very romantic.
Riiiight.... so where does appearance come into play? ;D
Before or
after they open their mouths? >:D
I've dated people tall and short, rail thin and heavy, its not the determining quality.
More than anything else I think the quality of their past relationships has more influence then what they look like.
Quote from: tekla on March 06, 2008, 08:19:04 PM
I've dated people tall and short, rail thin and heavy, its not the determining quality.
More than anything else I think the quality of their past relationships has more influence then what they look like.
You have a very interesting way of answering a question.
How does someone's past relationship influence you and how would you find out such information? Or do you mean quantity? ::)
I prefer the rack as a way of extracting information. No, really, you just talk. And its the kind of relationships they had, how they went, how they ended, how they are with that person now, that is more important than numbers. It's about patterns, that tend to repeat. If all of their prior relationships ended badly, that's a clue. If they tend to be long term, stable, that's better. If its the first relationship, then that's kind of a back away sign, I'm not into relationships with training wheels.
And in that, TG/straight, open relationships or closed, tends not to make a difference much. Relationships are about people not labels.
Quote from: Rebis on March 06, 2008, 07:54:37 PM
Oh My God! I just thought, would anybody here date J. Edgar Hoover?
My answer is an emphatic NO WAY!!!! Ick... barf!!!! not my type at all:P
Z
Me neither.
NO to J. Edgar Hoover, :-X YES to Rupaul. :)
Yes to Rou?
(it's a dude)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi130.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fp266%2Fnanahomiharu%2FAnCafe%2Fancafe17bn2.jpg&hash=15acca84cf2edd191b3172d1036de9a85f25eb01)
she's nice. Does she identify as male?
I know she's a male dressed as female but I'd prefer to address her as 'she' because she is presenting as female.
It seems to identify as male but common rumor in Japan is it was desiring a gender change.
Unfortunatly, it's gone from the band now and noone knows anything:-(
Stealth maybe? LOL.
If anyone on here knows anything about me at all, you already know my answer to the topical question is an emphatic "yes." I have dated men, women, intersexed individuals, transsexuals... I have run the gamut. I'm done with dating, having found the absolute love of my life in a beautiful woman who happens to have been born with the physical disorder of transsexualism, and I couldn't be happier with my decision.
Sure, there are problems. We constantly struggle with trying to be perceived by others in the way in which we perceive ourselves. We have to figure out how to delegate funds to our various trans-related costs. But we have each other, always, and truthfully, she's more feminine than most of the genetic women I dated before. If you close yourself off to dating people just because of one physical trait or another, you close yourself off to the opportunity of meeting someone who just might be the perfect person for you.
the blissfully omnisexual, and blissfully taken Sebastien Dean
if i see a guy dressed as a woman, who identifys as a guy, ill call him him....
would you call the lead singer of dead or alive she (forgotten his name)?
R >:D
I try to call people what they want to be called. Its not that big a deal to me, and its a form of respect to them.
Does anybody talk to anyone here, I mean, out in public? I don't know, it's like everyone lives their lives in a book or something!
What's wrong with just asking a person how they would like to be addressed? I have been asked and I was not offended.
Everyone watching their P's and Q's and trying to second guess things is so unnatural, I don't know how some of you folk get about in real life?!?
Lead singers of bands are a different category altogether. Probably wouldn't be able to hear you anyway, so why bother how you would address them! They wouldn't give a flying fig, so why should anyone else.
Now Mr, Miss, Ms Citizen down the local pub, club, in your neighbourhood probably would like abit of fore thought into how you address them, so as I said before, just ask. They won't bite your head off!
And if they do, you probably deserved it!! >:D >:D
That's why I said I call them what they want. Makes it easy that way. What's it matter to me anyway? Heck I know a guy who calls himself the Emperor Norton the III (We have a history of people here thinking they are the Emperor of SF) and we all call him The Emperor, as long as I don't have to pay tribute to him besides buying him a drink now and again, what's it hurt?
My world is not so ridged that things must fit in my boxes. I can accommodate.
if someone asked me if i prefered he or she. id probably slap them...
R >:D
If your first reaction is to use violence as a means of addressing or solving a problem, they most likely will not need to ask - they will know.
that its an indignent reaction because you just asked a woman if she was a bloke?
i think its a reaction that most of my friends would share....
'excuse me, do you prefer i address you as he or she?'
'wut'
'are you a man or woman'
*SMACK*
i think the answer is clear, and not how you decide to insinuate Tekla....
if you think women dont slap people for something like that, your bloody barmy...
R >:D
50 some years on this planet I've never been slapped. Punched a few times, never slapped. I just say "My name is "X" and your is?" They tell you, then you know. But there are other clues. I just don't see what the deal is in letting people be who they want, and not what you insist.
What am i insisting?
i suggested that if someone asked me what pronouns i prefered, then they were insulting me, and as such, require such reaction. not to be petty here tekla, but your a guy, youve been punched probably buy guys or girls... girls dont punch as a response to an insult, some do sure, but not nice girls. (i like to think there is such a thing still)
Its entirely theoretical, because lets face it, ive never been asked what my gender is...
R >:D
And.... if you get it wrong? No big deal! Say sorry, no harm done! An apology goes a long way, could even get them talking.
The only people who p*ss me off are ones who intentionally call me what they want, not what I want!
I've had it happen once and I don't think that girl will do that in a hurry again to anyone!!
I think some of you on here a too timid, don't like to apologize when you get it wrong. Mistakes happen, have a sense of humour about it! And yes, I've had my face slapped, when I was a teen, I was a cheeky monkey back then!! >:D
Though I am slightly more attracted to men than women at this point, I was completely hetero before transition.
I would most definitely date a TS. What is really important to me is personality. In fact, I have met very few cisgendered men that I would consider dating material. While I may find them physically attractive, oft the attraction quickly fades the moment they open their mouths. I find the vast majority of natal males to be arrogant, rude, brash and full of themselves. All qualities I could never deal with in a relationship. Most of them aren't interested in me anyway. I'll meet someone who is interested in me and the moment they find out I'm trans I never hear from them again.
I have met one natal male who seems to be kind, gentle, caring, and treats me in our conversations like a lady. I met him on another site, not TS related at all, and not a dating site. Yesterday when I was having a bad day he called me on the phone just to make sure I was OK. But he lives in Europe and I am Stateside. He was already planning on moving here to the U.S. and if he does it might be interesting, but honestly I'm not holding my breath. My gender therapist, interestingly enough, has offered up the idea that he might secretly be TS himself. If he was I wouldn't care.
Unfortunately, in my area it seems like all the TS people are either woodworked or simply don't venture out of their own homes. You know when you buy a car and suddenly it seems like you see the same make, model, and color car everywhere you look? I thought that sort of thing might happen after transition, but it hasn't. I am very much alone here. The local support group is overrun by CD/DQ's and I just don't relate to them at all, so I no longer attend the meetings.
Kelli
uh, if you think transmen arnt arogant rude or brash, youve got a suprise coming love....
Trans men, are as varied as natal men....
suggesting thier automatically not those things, is like the arseholes who suggest transwomen are 'more feminine than natal females' and softer/gentler/more apreciative of male affection....
Steriotype gender, not how someone starts....
R >:D
Last February I met this wonderful transsexual and we really clicked right off the bat. Now with me being a cross-dresser we figured that there wouldn't be any problems. Now a month later, things are still going strong and we're planning our marriage now, which has been tentitively set for May 10, 2008. Love is so wonderful, especially when you're with the right person. :) :) :) Read more about it in the cross-dressing forum under 'TRUE LOVE"
Gina :icon_dance:
Quote from: Rachael on March 07, 2008, 06:35:15 AM
uh, if you think transmen arnt arogant rude or brash, youve got a suprise coming love....
Trans men, are as varied as natal men....
suggesting thier automatically not those things, is like the arseholes who suggest transwomen are 'more feminine than natal females' and softer/gentler/more apreciative of male affection....
Steriotype gender, not how someone starts....
R >:D
Ummmm... I'll pretend you didn't just call me an ->-bleeped-<-. Anyway, here's my thoughts on this, and not knowing any transmen save one from another message board, I really have nothing to go by but what I have heard from others...
I have a unique perspective on men since I lived the role for 35 years. I would suspect that transmen would likely have a unique perspective on women since they lived the role. I have been told that they are oft more sensitive to the needs of women than the average natal male. I see no reason to believe this couldn't be the case, though I am certain that you're right -- that like anyone, personalities are varied. I would also think though that they would be more understanding of someone who is also trans.
Kelli
i didnt call you an ->-bleeped-<-... i said the people, mainly admirers who do it, are......
I dont think i understand men any better from living that way for 19 years....
i cant understand them any better than any of my peers.... how they operate? sure... how they think? forget about it....
If you think a f2m understands how women think, youve got a shock coming, as i suspect most will agree with me....
Why would a guy understand women? even if he lived as one since birth?
How women socialise, operate, and behave maybe, why? forget about it....
Also if you think 'average' natal men are like you describe, you are quite wrong, or hang out in a very bad crowd...
R >:D
Quote from: Rachael on March 07, 2008, 07:44:31 AM
i didnt call you an ->-bleeped-<-... i said the people, mainly admirers who do it, are......
Thanks for clarifying :)
QuoteI dont think i understand men any better from living that way for 19 years....
i cant understand them any better than any of my peers.... how they operate? sure... how they think? forget about it....
Point well taken. I don't really understand them either, but I did spend 35 years, two marriages, and having children trying to live as one. It didn't work, I failed miserably, but I think I do have a unique perspective on at least some things. Anyway, this is getting fairly off-topic.
QuoteIf you think a f2m understands how women think, youve got a shock coming, as i suspect most will agree with me....
It does make sense. I think like a woman because I have female brain sex. An FTM would think like a man because they have male brain sex. I do, and have always, been frustrated because people expect me to act and react like a man. Some people who knew me before still do, though I think they are learning.
QuoteWhy would a guy understand women? even if he lived as one since birth?
How women socialise, operate, and behave maybe, why? forget about it....
Yes, again true enough.
QuoteAlso if you think 'average' natal men are like you describe, you are quite wrong, or hang out in a very bad crowd...
R >:D
I would love for my disillusion to be shattered, believe me. :)
Anyway, like I said, the personality is most important to me -- male, female, trans or not.
Quote from: tekla on March 07, 2008, 03:04:12 AM
I try to call people what they want to be called. Its not that big a deal to me, and its a form of respect to them.
Seconded. Its why I kinda try picking up on anything I can when I'm unsure about someone... Lol, cause I respect em'.