Yes, I know that a "true androgynous" person should be happy with their looks, but that isn't me, apparently. Personally, I want a more feminine face. I mean one look at my avatar and you can tell I'm way too masculine looking. So, I want this to such an extent, I'm willing to go through extensive surgery and even weather the aftermath of it. So, am I wrong for wanting this? Am I not a "true androgynous" person for wanting this?
I don't really care to change my body. I just want to change my face. I, more or less, want to change my forehead, my brow, and my nose to be more beautiful.
I hope I don't infuriate this forum with my apparent heresy. Or maybe I'm not really a neutral type of person.
By the way, do I need a therapist's approval to pursue this quirk of my being?
Heresy? You are among people who understand. There is no Heresy. It is ok to want a female body yet not feel like a guy or girl. There is no true anything. You are who you are, beautiful in your own unique way. You can be wired for a female body yet have an androgyne identity. In fact there are others just like you here.
I for one am similar in many ways. I want a female body. I identify as being a woman yet I'm not a giry girl. I'm more of a tomboy. I have gay male friends far more girly than me.
I think you need a therapist if you are after Hormone therapy and ultimately SRS if that is what you want - someone to sign the documents. You don't need their approval to be you though - you just are whatever fits you best my friend. A therapist can't tell you who you are and you need no ones permission.
(also you face is not as masculine as you think it is. I can see the pretty girl peeking through)
I'm trying to pursue a more masculine body, so I don't see why a male-bodied androgyne shouldn't pursue a more feminine one. FWIW, I read your face as quite feminine in yr profile pic.
Wow, thank you so much for the replies! I thought I was going to be beaten and tarred, but you have relieved my concern.
Quote(also you face is not as masculine as you think it is. I can see the pretty girl peeking through)
Awww, thanks. I appreciate it.
I don't think this is truly a gender identity issue.
Virtually everyone would change something about their facial features if they could!
Plastic surgeons rarely require psychological evaluation for the type of aesthetic surgery you desire.
Make an appointment for a consolation! :icon_biggrin:
-Emerald :icon_mrgreen:
I'm male bodied, neither gender, would like to have a more feminine appearance. I'll also say you look feminine already, play with your hair style, that should help. Warm welcome to Susan's.
Z
You can change the way you look, lots of people do, they don't need a note or permission.
nothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
Quote from: Pica Pica on May 28, 2008, 02:54:07 PM
nothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
former USA president Reagan said ketchup was a vegetable
Z
Quote from: Pica Pica on May 28, 2008, 02:54:07 PM
nothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
In my country they call it sauce. You can buy ketchup and can get it at McDonalds - but the majority of people get tomato sauce (which is far superior even though it is basically the same stuff - maybe less sweet as everything of American origin seems to be totally over sweet.)
- Sorry Poly, totaly side tracked..
Thank you everyone for replying.
Quote
I don't think this is truly a gender identity issue.
Virtually everyone would change something about their facial features if they could!
Plastic surgeons rarely require psychological evaluation for the type of aesthetic surgery you desire.
Make an appointment for a consolation!
I've sent an email to a plastic surgeon in Boston. I hope he can give me a better idea what I might need to happen to look more feminine in appearance.
QuoteI'll also say you look feminine already, play with your hair style, that should help.
This statement gave me a little laugh. I don't know if that is what you meant to happen, but regardless, I appreciate the compliment.
QuoteYou can change the way you look, lots of people do, they don't need a note or permission.
This statement gives me some hope that the world is more tolerant than I previously thought.
Quotenothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
I'm not sure what this meant. I'm too dull to know.
Quote from: Zythyra on May 28, 2008, 03:07:19 PM
Quote from: Pica Pica on May 28, 2008, 02:54:07 PM
nothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
former USA president Reagan said ketchup was a vegetable
Z
Some U.S. schools have used it as a vegetable when claiming how healthy their menus are (no joke).
Ketchup isn't a vegetable? You'll be telling me next that blue isn't a flavour, and caffeine isn't a vitamin.
I'm somewhere in the middle would like some more fem parts to balance my male ones you are not alone
Hmmm, for some reason, I enjoy reading what you have to say Kinkly. You might be a little terse, but for some reason, you are also hitting home, I guess. I also would like to hear from Jaimey. Both of you, I seem to enjoy listening to what you have to say. In addition, I'd like to hear what sd really thinks about this.
Quote from: polymorphic on May 28, 2008, 04:14:12 AM
Yes, I know that a "true androgynous" person should be happy with their looks
Actually, I've noticed that most of us want to look more like the opposite sex, despite being androgyne. I think it's because to look more androgynous, we all feel we need to look more like the opposite sex, so actually, you're right on track...and I agree with Nick...I don't think your face is as masculine as you might think it is.
Here are some small things you can do. First, I'd say the hair. :D A razor cut works really well for a more androgynous style. And since your hair looks curly (mine is), a straightening iron can be an awesome tool for androgynous hair with the razor cut. Also, plain jewelry. Like a plain silver ring on the thumb or middle finger, just as an example. Little things like that are a good start! Also...this might be pushing your comfort zone, but if you can do it right, eyeliner (top lashes only). It takes a LOT of practice, but it can be done where it doesn't look like your wearing any. When I put mine on, I use a pencil and I put it on from UNDER the lashes instead of on top. Get a color close to your eyelash color and it will look really natural and make sure it's a really SMALL pencil.
Just doing these little things can help you find your comfort zone and to know your desires a little better. :laugh:
Quote from: polymorphic on May 28, 2008, 06:52:14 PM
I also would like to hear from Jaimey.
:icon_redface: You all and your pretty words!!! That's twice in about 10 minutes!!!
I'm glad I can help!
Posted on: May 28, 2008, 07:27:32 PM
Quote from: polymorphic on May 28, 2008, 04:57:25 PM
Quotenothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
I'm not sure what this meant. I'm too dull to know.
hehehe...don't worry, we'll
corrupt bring you over to our weirdo humor soon enough. >:D
Quote from: Kinkly on May 28, 2008, 06:30:42 PM
I'm somewhere in the middle would like some more fem parts to balance my male ones you are not alone
When I was a younger man I had quite a few features that were feminine from the shape of my face to having a rather small frame (a parting shot of T took care of that at 28 when I "filled out"). Of course I didn't figure all of this out until much later in life; at the time I knew I "looked" different but could not put a finger on why. I have been working back toward that look (and making some progress on it) because I think I looked a lot better that way than I do now. It would be nice to have the outer appearance somewhat mirror the inner person.
QuoteHere are some small things you can do. First, I'd say the hair. Cheesy A razor cut works really well for a more androgynous style. And since your hair looks curly (mine is), a straightening iron can be an awesome tool for androgynous hair with the razor cut. Also, plain jewelry. Like a plain silver ring on the thumb or middle finger, just as an example. Little things like that are a good start! Also...this might be pushing your comfort zone, but if you can do it right, eyeliner (top lashes only). It takes a LOT of practice, but it can be done where it doesn't look like your wearing any. When I put mine on, I use a pencil and I put it on from UNDER the lashes instead of on top. Get a color close to your eyelash color and it will look really natural and make sure it's a really SMALL pencil.
I won't say I'm not going to experiment; instead, I'll just leave it at that. In other words, there is a moderate possibility I might try some of those things.
Quoteand I agree with Nick...I don't think your face is as masculine as you might think it is.
I wish my face wasn't as dreadful as I keep thinking it is. Anyway, thanks Jaimey.
Quote
hehehe...don't worry, we'll corrupt bring you over to our weirdo humor soon enough.
I hope this is a good thing. *gulp*
Way off topic, but yes, I did watch anime and read some manga. Although I have largely fallen out of the practice of doing that, I still do watch anime to an extent.
Here's a list of animes/manga that I have seen/read.
The Slayers/Slayers Next/Slayers Try ( I loved this one.)
Outlaw Star (Okayish)
Trigun (Good)
Sailor Moon (I don't know if this makes me very girly, but yes, I did watch about twenty episodes.)
Neon Genesis Evangelion
Visions of Escaflowne
Gundam: War in the pocket
Gundam 08th Ms team
Berserk
Hellsing
Hack Sign
Tenchi Muyoi
X TV
Inu Yasha (Not too proud of this one)
Ghost In the Shell: Stand Alone Complex (watched about half of it)
Rurouni Kenshin (I loved this one, especially the Kyoto arc)
Full Metal Panic (watched a bit of it. Something turned me off through.)
Ranma 1/2 season 1/season 2/season 3 ( I loved this one. I'm especially fond of Ranma's ability to turn into a full blown girl. God I wish I could do that.)
Noir
Yu Yu Hakusho
Martian Successor Nadesico
Vandread
Crest of the Stars I/II/III (Absolutely loved this one. It might be my favorite ever.)
Hunter x Hunter TV/OVA/OVA2 (I liked this one. Kurapica is quite cute.)
Naruto (Yep, not that great, but whatever.)
Full Metal Alchemist( I loved this one. I cried at the ending. It was just too much to bear.)
Dragonball Z (GOD I hate this one, but yes, I was forced to watch this anime!)
Gundam Wing (Another one I don't really like!)
I bet Jaimey has seen a few animes and read a few mangas as well? If you want, I'd be delighted to hear what you have seen.
I know I'm more of mainstream type person, but I can't help it. Anyways, I hope to hear from you again.
Quote from: Jaimey on May 28, 2008, 07:30:39 PM
Posted on: May 28, 2008, 07:27:32 PM
Quote from: polymorphic on May 28, 2008, 04:57:25 PM
Quotenothing is wrong except tomato ketchup
I'm not sure what this meant. I'm too dull to know.
hehehe...don't worry, we'll corrupt bring you over to our weirdo humor soon enough. >:D
Welcome to the land of insufferable thread hijacking ;) ;D
Z
I stood in line for 30 minutes and had to take my shoes off twice...and this thread was still hijacked???? Thank goodness the person with the scanner wand was cute. :o
Poly, many of us wish we looked different. I would give anything to look like Myrna Loy, but then what do I know, I like tomato catsup. (Thanks for making me feel like a dunderhead, Pica)
.....L
Quote from: Zythyra on May 28, 2008, 08:42:59 PM
Quote from: Jaimey on May 28, 2008, 07:30:39 PM
Posted on: May 28, 2008, 07:27:32 PM
hehehe...don't worry, we'll corrupt bring you over to our weirdo humor soon enough. >:D
Welcome to the land of insufferable thread hijacking ;) ;D
Z
You call me a thread hijacker, Z? :icon_suspicious: I don't know what you're talking about! And I was a good little androgyne, I sent my GINORMOUS anime list in a message instead of subjecting you all to my madness. So there. :P
Quote from: polymorphic on May 28, 2008, 06:52:14 PM
Hmmm, for some reason, I enjoy reading what you have to say Kinkly. You might be a little terse, but for some reason, you are also hitting home, I guess. I also would like to hear from Jaimey. Both of you, I seem to enjoy listening to what you have to say. In addition, I'd like to hear what sd really thinks about this.
I'm glads you have enjoyed what I've typed, I have post a fair bit on "mixed body for mixed mind" about this topic, what do you mean by terse?
I Sometimes wonder what is would be like to be "normal"
I like me as i am though
I would like my body to reflect my mind but thats scary so i'll take it slow
Quotewhat do you mean by terse?
I don't know. It just seems that you are a bit more concise in your writing than most. In other words, you aren't a very ostentatious type of person, I guess. Furthermore, you aren't frivolous; am I correct?
Personally, even from my limited view, you seem to me as a brutally honest person.
I am a little different. I am honest, but overly complex. I have an extreme tendency to make things out as worse than it might be.
In other words, I'm a pessimist.
Although this may be a great leap of faith, if there is someone you might be like, maybe it is Rene Descartes -- a philosopher. Anyway, keep up the writing Kinkly because I enjoy reading what you have to say.
Of course, I'm nothing but a fool...
Quote from: Jaimey on May 28, 2008, 10:44:37 PM
You call me a thread hijacker, Z? :icon_suspicious: I don't know what you're talking about!
I wouldn't ever accuse anyone of hijacking threads Jaimey.... however if the shoe fits ;) :P >:D
Z
"Is it wrong for a neutral type person to pursue more feminine looks?" No. Your comfort is what matters. Terse enough? :laugh:
Nichole
thanks 4 the complement polymorphic
I would think its OK to go after any look, more or less fem, more or less butch, goth, emo, skatepunk, business drag.
Quote from: Zythyra on May 29, 2008, 06:23:24 AM
Quote from: Jaimey on May 28, 2008, 10:44:37 PM
You call me a thread hijacker, Z? :icon_suspicious: I don't know what you're talking about!
I wouldn't ever accuse anyone of hijacking threads Jaimey.... however if the shoe fits ;) :P >:D
Z
*GASP* :icon_blah:
...all right. so MAYBE i've hijacked a thread here and there... :eusa_whistle:
...okay, so I just read what this is. :icon_female: I totally thought it was a Roman soldier or something...
Quote from: Jaimey on May 29, 2008, 10:12:49 PM
...okay, so I just read what this is. :icon_female: I totally thought it was a Roman soldier or something...
omg it's not? that's exactly what i thought!
Quote from: Nero on May 29, 2008, 10:24:26 PM
Quote from: Jaimey on May 29, 2008, 10:12:49 PM
...okay, so I just read what this is. :icon_female: I totally thought it was a Roman soldier or something...
omg it's not? that's exactly what i thought!
It's not just me!!! YAY! Apparently, it's supposed to be a woman. It says 'icon_female'. What? Really? I don't know...
No, we never stray from a topic... Never, ever, ever, not even a little. Especially Jaimey.
QuoteNo, we never stray from a topic... Never, ever, ever, not even a little. Especially Jaimey.
haha...
Well, duh! Only those weirdos in the other forums do that sort of thing. ::)
By the way, sd, I want to know your two cents about this topic. So, please please, tell all what you think.
Quote from: polymorphic on May 30, 2008, 01:39:56 AM
By the way, sd, I want to know your two cents about this topic. So, please please, tell all what you think.
I don't usually get involved in serious discussions unless I have something significant to add.
As long as you are not hurting anyone else and you are willing to deal with the consequences (what others think), I say go for it. It helps that you are from a generation and at an age where you can get away with an awful lot and no one will think much of it. What I think really doesn't matter, what matters is what you want and are willing to do/deal with. It is up to you, there is no right or wrong on this issue, especially in this forum. Whatever you want to do, most, if not everyone here will support you as long as they think you are sure of what you are doing and not moving too fast.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to do something It might be best only doing easily reversible things first and cheap things like makeup untill you know exactly what you want
QuoteI'll also say you look feminine already, play with your hair style, that should help.
*nodnod* Yeah, it's already quite femme, and if you did something to bring out the curl a little it would look even moreso. Also, have you thought about colouring your hair?
Awww, thanks Lokaeign. I guess my hair is pretty bouncy and wavy. What could I do to make it more curly? To answer your question, I don't really want to change my hair's color. I like my hair the color it is -- which is really really dark brown.
Quote from: Zythyra on May 28, 2008, 03:07:19 PM
former USA president Reagan said ketchup was a vegetable
Takes one to know one? >:D
Nfr
I don't think it's wrong at all. I'd say a few steps more feminine would bring you closer to androgynous.
But you might not need surgery to do this. For instance, maybe a different hair style would help. I also know eyebrow shape makes a BIG difference. I plucked my eyebrows for a while, which looked really feminine. Now I don't so much, except between them, haha.
I say beauty is overrated. All the actors I think are beautiful all my friends seem to think are old/ugly.
Quote from: Seshatneferw on May 30, 2008, 12:52:43 PM
Takes one to know one? >:D
Arg... adding up reagan plus both bushes.... 20 years of my adult life.... not sure I can take much more of this :icon_blah:
Z
Quote from: sd on May 30, 2008, 12:49:33 AM
No, we never stray from a topic... Never, ever, ever, not even a little. Especially Jaimey.
:icon_hahano:
I'd hate to have to come over there, sd... :icon_bat:
Quote from: Elwood on May 30, 2008, 01:38:57 PM
I say beauty is overrated. All the actors I think are beautiful all my friends seem to think are old/ugly.
My tastes seem to be different than most people I know too. Oh well. More for me!
I say beauty is overrated
Beauty is never over-rated in a very ugly world, but what qualifies as beauty, is, at best, subjective.
Quote from: tekla on June 01, 2008, 06:57:52 PM
I say beauty is overrated
but what qualifies as beauty, is, at best, subjective.
That's very true...
Hi polymorphic. The first thing that came to mind when I read your original post was "define true androgyne". There are so many different ways to be an androgyne that we really have to be careful to speak in general terms about what an androgyne is compared to someone else. And that "true" really struck me in the craw, no offense intended. I've seen too many groups play the whole "->-bleeped-<-r than thou" game. All it really does is divides people. If you say you're an androgyne then by god you're an androgyne. No need to qualify that.
Some androgynes want to change their looks, some don't. I know I'd love to. You're talking to a big old 6' rock monster here. That's hardly androgynous looking. I can't decide if I want to do anything about how I look but either way I'm still an androgyne. Unlike transsexuals, there aren't different classifications of androgynes depending on whether you've had anything done or even if you want anything done. Are you not a |man| and not a |woman|? To me, that's all that matters.
Nothing you do regarding your androgyny is right or wrong, at least not in terms of some big rule book. There's only the matter of what's right and wrong for you. If you want to change how you look, fine. If you don't, that's fine too. (If you want to change how someone else looks, that's usually unlawful or illegal.)
Heresy? Hardly. Look at some of the old threads in this forum from 6 months or a year ago. Just about everything was fair game for discussion. There is no heresy in the androgyne forum. There are only honest questions and thoughts.