Seriously.
Yep. money makes stuff easy but it aint everythin ;) ppl can be hella rich but alone. depresed. so whats the point? :-\ u cant buy happines w/money.
Love isn't subject to the conditions of someone's economic ability, imo, Nero. If the heart holds love, romantic or any other variety, then it's not bounded by a lot of silly chains: money, status, religious affiliation or lack of it, race, color, sex-characteristics, gender, intelligence or its lack or looks.
Love comes only through knowing and feeling. Ay least that's my experience. Anyhting else is peurile nonsense and drives love out.
Nichole
Yes, but to be perfectly honest, I would have trouble loving someone uneducated. Whether officially or self-taught doesn't matter, but I would have trouble getting past poor grammar, illiteracy, and narrowness of thought in order to get to know the person well enough to love them.
Quote from: Nero on July 15, 2008, 01:50:54 AM
Could you love someone poor?
Yes, I could. Money is no object for me nor do I have any educational standards for those I fall in love with. I find that a good soul can always make up for any other deficiencies. Not everyone is well equipped to be thinkers, scientists, money-makers, etc, etc, etc, and in most cases this is no fault of their own. To accept this and still be proud of what they CAN do is worth a lot IMHO.
tink :icon_chick:
Of course.
Love is love. It isn't dependent on money, education, looks, health, station in life. If you love someone, really love them. That is all that matters. The rest can always be worked out.
Love,
Janet
You mean love a poor person?
Of course. But only if they're poor because of some sort of legitimate reason. If they're lazy asses, I can't love someone like that. They're lazy asses.
Hmmm....are you poor, Nero? Sorry, guy, but I'm taken. Also, I'm really old. And I have a partner I love. And oh yeah, I only go for girls.
Nero Hon,
What kind of car do you drive? ;D ::)
Sorry >:D,
Janet
Quote from: Janet Lynn on July 15, 2008, 09:43:21 PM
Nero Hon,
What kind of car do you drive? ;D ::)
Sorry >:D,
Janet
Oooh, you're so rad, Janet. ;D
I know if I were to love someone intimately and with all my heart, I would do my damnest to make sure that they never felt the hardships that poverty causes. And, I would expect the same in return.
And what do you drive, Elwood? :-*
Janet
Quote from: Janet Lynn on July 15, 2008, 10:56:01 PM
And what do you drive, Elwood? :-*
Janet
Right now, I am a new driver, practicing on a learner's permit.
I drive my step-mom's Honda, my dad's Suburban, and my dad's Viper.
That's right. VIPER. ;D Just kidding, I haven't driven it yet, but I will eventually. :)
When you love someone, you have all you ever need. Everything else is superfluous. Souls, hearts, the connections formed between two sentient beings... don't hang on a price tag. What matters is the feeling, the emotion, the bond you share... not the bank balance.
Money can be lost and gained in the blink of an eye. Love can last forever. :)
I would rather be poor and madly in love with someone, truly and deeply in love with them, than rich. I hate money in general and see it as the root of evil. Love is good and ever lasting. As others said, money isn't everything.
And yes, I'm an idealist and a romantic at heart when it comes to love. :icon_love:
Jenn
If I ever had to choose between love and money, I'd never be poor again. I just wouldn't have any money. :)
Quote from: umop ap!sdn on July 15, 2008, 11:24:01 PM
If I ever had to choose between love and money, I'd never be poor again. I just wouldn't have any money. :)
Well said!! :D
Jenn
I did fall in love with a poor man. But he is very smart. He doesn't have a college degree but has saved his whole life for retirement. Yes, very smart indeed.
Cindi
I presume I would. I'd imagine it'd be a tad difficult to establish a romantic relationship with someone whose intellectual capacity were below average, but I'd find it more traumatizing to have feelings for an arrogant, nerdy, know-it-all prick!
I think I could love someone poor. If they have the capacity to take care of them selves physically. But not someone who just lives on the street because they want to or have some issues that keeps them there. I guess if someone is living on the street would be a major problem for me.
Anna
Nero, to me money is a tool to keep you from suffering. Once you have enough to not suffer, having more of it doesn't do anything to make you happy. The amount of money a prospective love has is not even on the list things I think about. Ell and I didn't even get around to talking about money until last night.
And Janet, I don't have a car.
Quote from: Lisbeth on July 16, 2008, 05:08:23 AM
And Janet, I don't have a car.
I gotta car. I got class. Shows I got money.
I gotta yr.2000 Ford Ranger. I let God wash it in the driveway every time it rains.
It would take someone pretty shallow to not love someone because they were poor.
That was something that never entered my concious mind.
Sarah L.
I guess I would first draw a distinction between being poor and poverty. The first a relative value, the second is far more of an absolute. And real poverty as the people know who have gone through it is a soul-grinding, mind-deadening deal. Its not romantic, uplifting, or empowering - pretty much the exact opposite. It makes love hard indeed.
Second, the most common given reason in marriage breakups is financial problems, and that's very real. You can't be romantic if the phone is always ringing with bill collectors, and you can't sleep because you are worried about making the rent, having your power cut off or tying to choose if you are going to have to put gas in the car or eat next week.
As someone above said 'money can not buy happiness,' and I suppose that is true, but it sure can postpone unhappiness, and no mistake about that either. And unhappy people are not good lovers. So, in a way, it is a bottom line deal.
idealist and a romantic at heart
I think most people are, it gets hard when idealism and romantic notions run head long into reality, which has a very nasty way of rearing its ugly head and inserting itself at exactly the wrong time and place, and in a way that can not be ignored.
And, for the record, I'm not all sure that it has much to do with being intelligent. Outside of rock star/theater/criminal types, who get their money in a strange way - a couple of the richest guys I know never went beyond high school, and I sure know a lot of people with advanced degrees who are barely making it, if that. While I would have a hard time with anyone who used "like" and "hella'
as every other word in every sentence they spoke - "It's you know like dude was hella pissed" makes me cringe. I don't require my lovers to be able to turn over and have a nice discussion about quantum mechanics either, though its good when they can.
I can love someone poor but I hope I can't love someone poorly.
Yes. It's the rich that get on my goat anyway.
Elwood My Man,
A viper?!?! Swing and pick me up. ;D >:D
And I do hope that everyone knows I'm kidding about the type of car a guy drive. Regardless of whether or not he is rich is immaterial. It depends on what type of a person they are. They must be kind, considerate, thoughtfully, honest and open.
Janet
Quote from: tekla on July 16, 2008, 11:21:11 AM
Second, the most common given reason in marriage breakups is financial problems, and that's very real. You can't be romantic if the phone is always ringing with bill collectors, and you can't sleep because you are worried about making the rent, having your power cut off or tying to choose if you are going to have to put gas in the car or eat next week.
The second most common reason for marriage breakups is couples who don't agree on how to manage money. The amount of it is seldom the problem.
Well that two for two in marriage breakups, better to not have money problems then I would guess.
I would think that two people making somewhat equal money might fight less, on the other hand I can't prove that in my own life.
In general, we could love everyone regardless of their education, IQ, EQ, or money. It can be suffocating to be with someone with a different intelligence path or on another frequency channel, but it's also true that some peeps that go to college are not necessarily intelligent, and some of those unable to go to college (or otherwise unwilling to go) can be far more intelligent than a person who has completed some sort of degree.
Quote from: Nero on July 15, 2008, 01:50:54 AM
Could you love someone poor? Seriously.
yes!
poor doesn't mean undereducated and vice versa! the use of hyperboles or embellished language doesn't make anyone "intelligent" ;) you get an f for that sort of thing in college. btw is my syntax ok? ::) blah!
Quote from: Natasha on December 15, 1999, 05:35:07 PM
Quote from: Nero on July 15, 2008, 01:50:54 AM
Could you love someone poor? Seriously.
yes!
poor doesn't mean undereducated and vice versa! the use of hyperboles or embellished language doesn't make anyone "intelligent" ;) you get an f for that sort of thing in college. btw is my syntax ok? ::) blah!
Sure, your syntax is just fine, do ya have any money? >:D
Quote from: Nichole on July 17, 2008, 10:05:48 AM
Quote from: Natasha on December 15, 1999, 05:35:07 PM
Quote from: Nero on July 15, 2008, 01:50:54 AM
Could you love someone poor? Seriously.
yes!
poor doesn't mean undereducated and vice versa! the use of hyperboles or embellished language doesn't make anyone "intelligent" ;) you get an f for that sort of thing in college. btw is my syntax ok? ::) blah!
Sure, your syntax is just fine, do ya have any money? >:D
i do. i have plenty of it. why do you ask? do you want to date me? >:D i'm taken!
Quote from: Jamie-o on July 15, 2008, 05:30:55 AM
Yes, but to be perfectly honest, I would have trouble loving someone uneducated. Whether officially or self-taught doesn't matter, but I would have trouble getting past poor grammar, illiteracy, and narrowness of thought in order to get to know the person well enough to love them.
I would have to agree with Jamie. Finances aren't the question. However, I would need someone who can communicate has been beyond the town boundaries.
Chaunte
Quote from: Jamie-o on July 15, 2008, 05:30:55 AM
Yes, but to be perfectly honest, I would have trouble loving someone uneducated.
QFT
That's a huge hangup for me.
Quote from: Elwood on July 15, 2008, 09:35:44 PM
You mean love a poor person?
Of course. But only if they're poor because of some sort of legitimate reason. If they're lazy asses, I can't love someone like that. They're lazy asses.
QFT
Those I know who can be classed as such economically, are typically there for reasons outside of "just being poor." Dreams, ambitions, aspirations: How does all that factor in? I know an amazing person who, at one time had everything you can materialisically dream for: the house overlooking the ocean, the Porsche Turbo.. but lost it all to tough luck and circumstace. Then I know someone who just doesn't try. They say they do, they believe they do; in the end, they just don't. Today, both share similar W2's, but are entirely different individuals.
Quote from: Leiandra on July 15, 2008, 11:11:43 PM
When you love someone, you have all you ever need. Everything else is superfluous. Souls, hearts, the connections formed between two sentient beings... don't hang on a price tag. What matters is the feeling, the emotion, the bond you share... not the bank balance.
Money can be lost and gained in the blink of an eye. Love can last forever. :)
Call me cynical; call me realistic; call me unrealisic; call me jaded; call me what you will I just can't see it that way. So many other things factor in other than just love. I think love is the foundation on which to build a life but by no means is it the "be all end all." I've been head over heels in love, and still other important elements factor in on which love cannot be expected to compensate for.
But that's just my opinion...
Yep, of course. And I have. My ex was on welfare when I got together with her. I've fallen for another woman who was on welfare. My current boyfriend doesn't have much income. My previous 2 girlfriends didn't make much money. So, yes. I guess I have a pattern of falling for people who might be considered poor (financially).
Hmmm, could I love someone poor? The question takes on new meaning lately as my own financial demographic has shifted...or maybe it hasn't. I don't think I could fall in love with someone who has no ambition, has no goals and no "plan" for where they see their life going. Now, if their "life plan" is not centered around money but teaching people how to change their life or something that I would consider admirable, that could work. I don't really care if I guy has a whole bunch of money, if he is 1) clean 2) attractive to me 3) polite & gets along with my family & friends 4) treats me like he can't imagine his life without me but doesn't smother me 5) has some ambition in life (not necessarily centered around a career and money) 6) can carry on a decent conversation and think at my level (duh, you know what I mean, not like I'm all intellectual or anything, but just be able to talk about things) and 7) is trustworthy and wouldn't break my heart then...I could love them.
And I don't think any of that has anything to do with money.
Quote from: MeghanAndrews on July 18, 2008, 01:13:37 PMI don't really care if I guy has a whole bunch of money, if he is 1) clean 2) attractive to me 3) polite & gets along with my family & friends 4) treats me like he can't imagine his life without me but doesn't smother me 5) has some ambition in life (not necessarily centered around a career and money) 6) can carry on a decent conversation and think at my level (duh, you know what I mean, not like I'm all intellectual or anything, but just be able to talk about things) and 7) is trustworthy and wouldn't break my heart then...I could love them.
I think you just described my boyfriend. :)
Love is love until it comes at you with an implement of destruction.
Quote from: Lisbeth on July 20, 2008, 07:52:26 AM
Quote from: Rebis on July 19, 2008, 09:51:37 PM
Love is love until it comes at you with an implement of destruction.
Unless that's your kink. Then it might be a big sign of love, depending.
I'm beginning to wonder if you need to be watched.
Quote from: Rebis on July 20, 2008, 10:39:58 AM
Quote from: Lisbeth on July 20, 2008, 07:52:26 AM
Quote from: Rebis on July 19, 2008, 09:51:37 PM
Love is love until it comes at you with an implement of destruction.
Unless that's your kink. Then it might be a big sign of love, depending.
I'm beginning to wonder if you need to be watched.
May--be...
Quote from: Rebis on July 20, 2008, 10:39:58 AM
Quote from: Lisbeth on July 20, 2008, 07:52:26 AM
Quote from: Rebis on July 19, 2008, 09:51:37 PM
Love is love until it comes at you with an implement of destruction.
Unless that's your kink. Then it might be a big sign of love, depending.
I'm beginning to wonder if you need to be watched.
Watching such things could also be a kink ;) >:D
Z
Quote from: Rebis on July 20, 2008, 10:39:58 AM
I'm beginning to wonder if you need to be watched.
I should make it clear that edge play (and use of similar implements of destruction) is actually one of my soft limits. I would be too afraid of accidentally harming my partner to play that way.
It's extremely unlikely that a poor person would ever receive the consideration. I expect a man to be able to take me out. HE takes ME to dinner. HE dates ME. After several dates, things MAY go further. HE drives up to my door, and if he's married, HE'S going to pay for the motel.
I LOVE to flirt with men, and I'm VERY GOOD at it. Even though I'm pre-op, I know exactly what to do, what not to do, what to say and how to say it. I'm too old to have any DEPENDENTS!!! And transition is expensive. Why should I allow myself to get involved with someone who is poor? I'm sure that there are some people out there who could make me happy without having any money, but there are many men out there who could make me happy, and can offer things that the poor man can't. Why should I consider allowing anyone to bring me down to his economic level?
I just barely made it through high school. I was sooo incredibly messed up as a teen, to the point of really believing at times that I was genetically complete as a female, plus serious drinking problems from the age of 14. I had no skills to enable me to find work, and I had been socialized as a female to the age of about 16...I had no male social skills. I never could hold a job. I found creative, legal ways to earn a living, and I had to take some VERY serious risks. I made it work, and now I'm retired. I've had a very difficult life, and there is no way that I would allow anyone to compromise my need to fully transition, or to interfere with my post transition goals.
Why should I?
When I had money it was 'hello sugar pie'
now that I'm broke it's 'good-bye country guy'
Quote from: April221 on July 20, 2008, 04:08:11 PM
and if he's married, HE'S going to pay for the motel.
:icon_tenisclap:
Quote from: April221 on July 20, 2008, 04:08:11 PM
and if he's married, HE'S going to pay for the motel.
If he's married, he can take a long walk off a short pier. I could stick it in "I confess," but I got involved with a married man once. It was the fast lane to heartbreak. All I can say about it is "don't." Just "don't."
Money doesnt matter.
I grew up with a mother on sickness pension (she has SLE/lupus)
and I'm used to having less than $1318 a month (might be much many places, but its certainly not enough here in Sweden). I know many people who loves me (even in a partnerdefined sort of way) and I love a lot of people who have same income as me or less.
I think deciding/choosing not to love someone just because they are poor is shallow and stupid.
If we are talking about other people who are poor in the sense of "no life experience whatsoever", then I might think twice before I let them be a part of my life.
Yes. If were even more poor than I am now, I could still love someone.
Quote from: lacitychick21 on July 18, 2008, 12:40:38 PMQFT
Quantum field theory? Yeah, that's HOT!!! :icon_love:
--
Some thoughts from song:
QuoteI'd like to buy you everything
A wooden bird with painted wings
A window full of colored rings
In morning, Morgantown.
But the only thing I have to give
To make you smile, to win you with
Are all the mornings still to live
In morning, Morgantown
... and on another note ...
QuoteNobody loves you when you're down and out.
In your pocket, not one penny,
And as for friends, you don't have any.
When you get back on your feet again
Everybody wants to be your long-lost friend.
I say it's strange, without any doubt,
Nobody knows you when you're down and out.
For me, it's not about the amount of money, but the way it's spent. Living well with what you have is the key.
Could I love someone poor? And why not? Poor is something we can get out of together. Amor vincit omnia ;)
Could I love someone poor? It is a trick question. If I love them, then they are truly wealthy, are they not? :angel:
excellent response. :)