Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: gravitysrainbow on July 25, 2008, 09:07:00 PM

Title: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: gravitysrainbow on July 25, 2008, 09:07:00 PM
Hey, I'm Michael...I'm brand new here, and looking for help. I graduated from high school in May, and I recently got back in touch with a couple of my teachers. I was involved with the passing of an anti-harassment policy for my school district, and outed myself as trans during a speech to the school board regarding that policy. I think my former English teacher knows I'm trans because of that (in a recent e-mail, she told me to "keep being who you are, and keep believing in who you are") and my Government/US History teacher, who I had for two years and have a giant crush on, likely knows too. Actually, I outed myself to him two years ago via a "getting to know you" notecard he had us fill out, because I trusted him pretty much immediately, but I don't know if he ever read those things. Aaanyway. I want to stay in touch with them, but it kills me to hear the female name/pronouns from them. Any advice on coming out to them?
Title: Re: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: noxdraconis on July 25, 2008, 10:20:01 PM
I know how you feel.  I just graduated this June and as a very popular person (at least among the faculty), I had a lot of requests to keep in touch and visit.  I want to, but I know that it would hurt me to hear them tell me what a bright young "woman" I am and all that stuff.  While there are a few who suspect I am sure, the only person at my school who knew of me being trans was my principal due to a special request I made of him.  I too would appreciate any advice.
Title: Re: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: gravitysrainbow on July 25, 2008, 10:41:10 PM
That's another good thing about my English teacher. In her e-mail, she called me a wonderful "person," not "young woman" or whatever. I can't decide if I'm overthinking things, or if that's another sign she knows. And I hope someone will give us some advice!
Title: Re: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: Elwood on July 26, 2008, 12:44:11 PM
Welcome Michael. I graduated in June, so we're probably around the same age.

I don't know how to you should go about coming out... that's really up to you. I'm probably going to come out to my peers/teachers at the 5 year reunion. I'll probably have started transition by then.
Title: Re: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: tekla on July 26, 2008, 12:47:53 PM
I would hope (though I have little faith) that an English teacher would choose the word they want most carefully.  So assume the English teacher said what they meant, and meant what they said.
Title: Re: Coming out to former teachers
Post by: sneakersjay on July 26, 2008, 03:31:33 PM
I was the quietest, shyest, honor student (read: boring!) in my school.  I'm going to my 30th reunion next year as Jonathan aka Jay.  Won't that cause quite a stir?!  Though no teachers have ever gone to any of the previous reunions, I don't anticipate any this time either.

Jay